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  1. #1
    hbprince is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default A little advice with one really pretty girl

    Hello! My name is Denis. I'm new in this forum, but i have registrated because like a newbie I would like to know what to do in one very important situation for me with one pretty girl.We're in the same school and we see each other every day, but I don't know why I can't speak to her, I just get frozen every time, maybe because I really care what would she say to me if i start talking to her and I don't want to screw everything up. Two months ago I wished her happy birthday, but...on facebook. Before that she was looking at me every time I pass near to her. That's why I wrote to her(14th of March).She said thanks, and then I asked her if she is still celebrating or the birthday is going to its end, but she didn't answer. In January I sent her an invitation for friendship but she didn't confirm it. She has been sending me so many ioi's that i'm really confused why would she not want to write to me or confirm my invitation.Obviously when i'm writing here, i still haven't talked to her. And yes, she is still watching me with that look.I have forgotten to say that she is a 9 and she has seen so many guys trying to approach her, so i'm worried if I become one of these who has tried and nothing happened. At 12th of May there's a trip to a monastery near to our city and then to Stob's pyramids. I think that i will be the only boy who will go, so I have to talk to her, but she will be surrounded by her entourage of 3 friends, or even more because she and the girls from my class know each other. So the question is how to open such a whole group and to make her know that I like her and at the end of the day to have her number and a date with her ? I was thinking about the option to go everywhere that she goes and to be always near to her, but one friend of her is always angry(maybe because she's ugly, I don't know ) and she is "her bitch-shield" which can tear down my plans.Her cousin,in fact, is in my class, but I don't know how the situation with introduction goes, because it has never happened to me before.Don't think that i'm one ugly guy, trying to approach the most beautiful girl - no, i'm 8, but i haven't gone out the last years and I have created a low self-evaluation, that's why I'm not confident now - because i don't know my possibilities and I can't estimate the whole thing and my chances right.
    Thanks in advance.
    P.S. I'm not a native speaker, so excuse my bad english

  2. #2
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    Default Re: A little advice with one really pretty girl

    Sounds like you've got a bad cause one one-its. Why do you care what she thinks dude you don't even know her. You've already lost this one because all those needy vibes you're throwing off she can pick up. The point of meeting girls is to get to know them then decide where you're at from there. I was there once in the day you don't want to mess around with this chic. The reason you can't talk to her is because you're so infatuated with her you're afraid to upset her in anyway, so you'll never get anywhere except smack in the friend zone. I suggest you work on your inner game first, then go on and meet new girls and go on dates. Good Luck.
    In life you get what you put into it.

  3. #3
    hbprince is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: A little advice with one really pretty girl

    So you are saying that i have lost my chance with that chick ? I'm not afraid to upset her, i'm afraid to upset everybody - so it's not just about her I'm just that kind of person. Isn't there any way to make her like me then or it isn't ? I really like that girl but i have screwed the things already... By the way from a month i'm trying to throw her vibes that i don't care about her and she started coming to my classroom more. But became one problem - one of my classmates started talking to her in thursday and was trying to talk to her yesterday when she went out from school, but she wasn't giving any vibes(at least I haven't seen such), because she wasn't looking at him and in the middle of their talking she started asking one guy who had a sticking plaster on his head(he is training wrestling) why he had this.The previous day when they were talking, it was about our going to vacation on the sea and her complicated last name(he was making that he can't say her name and she started laughing by force, like she was mocking at his stupidity, after that she went out of the room and didn't say goodbye or sth to him, so I think that she doesn't like him. Months ago she had him in her friends in facebook, but she had removed him.
    P.S. Once it happened that her class wanted me to help them with one test in history, so when i went there, everybody was asking questions, even her best friends, but she didn't say a word, she was just listening to me and watching me all the time(that was after I wished her happy birthday and sent regards to her by her cousin.) Then it happened that I had to go the same day in her classroom again because I had to tell them some more stuff and I went to her friend, because I was writing the things before that at her desk. After she saw me, she came immediately and sat to her friend to be listening to me. I don't understand this whole thing...

  4. #4
    \\\PSY/// is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: A little advice with one really pretty girl

    Hello Denis. I am new to this forum/art as well; however, I do have a little bit of experience with the sort of situation that you are talking about. First, let me say that I agree, at least in part, with what Yolo said. You really don't want to get caught in the trap of idolizing some girl or thinking that she is "the one". Even men who are otherwise confident can get a serious sense of the jitters when that happens. Of course, being told to give up and seek other women is not why you came to this forum
    Let's start by getting a read on this girl, how she interacts, and what she expects from those interactions. Before we begin, though, I think you should be aware that I only have your statements and perceptions to go on, and those could very well be colored by the hopes and fears that you have regarding this girl. However, for the purposes of this post, I will assume that you are being objective.
    You said that this girl is about a 9 and often surrounded by groups of friends. As well, you mentioned that she approached several guys but didn't show any lasting interest. She even went to the extent of de-friending a guy on facebook, which is considered very harsh in today's social media-dominated society. From these items, which really aren't that much to go on, it sounds to me that this girl is a sort of social queen. That is, she holds a high social status and takes great pleasure in being desired by men.
    The above analysis may seem obvious, but there is a key subtlety here. Namely, she enjoys being desired, not had. The desire and interest that men express towards her are confirmations of her social status and only serve to cement her position in the social hierarchy and inflate her ego. Were she to actually go out/sleep with the men who expressed interest in her, it might lower her social status (i.e. she would be "easy") unless the man had equally high social standing. It is for this reason that she feels comfortable being generally unkind (if, in fact, she is) to men, and it is why she seems to lose interest once she has gained the validation of their IOIs. As a result, I would say that any sort of direct approach is definitely not the way that you want to go here. Of course, explicitly not expressing interest probably won't work either since, by your own indication, you are not someone of high social standing whom she would seek validation from. Instead, I suggest the following plan.
    First, you need to develop your social position and social skills. So forget about this girl for a while and just practice being comfortable with people. Try approaching many different people, even if you don't have any particular interest in being friends with them, and enjoy some light-hearted, fun conversation and interaction. I know that this can be harder than it sounds, especially if you are shy to begin with. I therefore suggest that you come up with some interesting conversation topics/jokes beforehand that you can use or fallback on (there are many right here on this forum). It's ok to use canned material; the best do it all the time. And if you start running out of pre-planned material and can't come up with anything else, make an excuse to leave, and leave them wanting more. By practicing your social skills in this way, not only will your ability to interact socially improve, but your social standing will improve as well.
    Once your social skills and standing have improved, however, I would still not attempt a direct approach of this girl. Instead, I think that it would be more fruitful for you to open her friends. As you become friends with her friends, you will find yourself around her often, but you will have a perfectly valid excuse for why you are there that denies her the validation that would cause a loss of interest. As well, this will allow you to make demonstrations of higher value without appearing to be trying to win her attraction. In fact, considering that a great deal of her self-esteem depends on her social standing, it may be very effective to express interest in her friends while negging her slightly (but not so hard that you become a jerk and get blown out of the group). Also, be sure not to (or at least appear not to) limit your romantic interactions to her since a little jealousy can be a huge motivator. If you play your cards right, I think you will find that she will ask you out.

    Good Hunting
    \\\PSY///

  5. #5
    hbprince is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: A little advice with one really pretty girl

    Thank you for the answer. By the way I know all the guys in her class whom she talks to and she has seen me talking with them. In Friday it happened that I was walking exactly behind her and I was with her classmates and one of her best friends. Her BFF was asking me why I was always near to her class and I told her that I know my friend from long years and etc. She allowed me to stay with them(but she said that I have to tell her always why I'm in her group ) in the whole way and that's the angry bestfriend She didn't say anything about that, but after that she said that she has to do something and went fast with her friend and in the first meters she was swinging her hips expressly because (I think like that) she saw me just before that i'm walking behind her(but she was with glasses and I didn't see her eyes to understand what is going on). You're definitely right that she just likes to be liked by the other guys and she's really kind of social queen.I think in some way that she doesn't do anything about me and her(and she is still just looking) because when somebody knows that you're smart, he thinks that you have lower value. So can talking to other unknown people make me look with a higher value in her eyes ?

  6. #6
    hbprince is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: A little advice with one really pretty girl

    Hello people. I got something new from these weeks. The things have become even stranger now. We went on that trip to one monastery and there the cousin of the girl I like invited me on their table. The girl I like moved her bag to sit next to her and I was talking to everybody in the group, she was with all her friends there..the entourage . I think that they accepted me well, but that was on the 12th of May. In friday(18th) I said hello to that girl and she answered immediately by saying Hi and shaking her hand. Yesterday I think I screwed the things a little because she was with her friends and two guys from their class whom I know from a long time, but I didn't say hello to anybody. At 16th of May I sent her a invitation for friendship in facebook, but she still hasn't accepted it or refused it. One of her friends accepted it immediately(but she accepts to everybody), but the other friend didn't refuse it or accept it too. Why would they do that? My other question is what should I do now ? I was almost the only guy on that trip, so I think that they invited me just of humanity, I mean not to be alone. The girl was talking about how she has to give to some other guys bracelets that she bought from the monastery, so I think that she was trying to demonstrate high value. On the way back to the autobus she was walking at some time exactly near to me, but she didn't so anything right to me, didn't ask me anything so that bothers me. Her cousin likes one other guy, so I know that this invitation wasn't from her, her other friends have boyfriends so the only explanation is that she invited me indirect. What do you think ? What's my next step now ? And why would she not accept my invitation in facebook ? Please give me some answers because i'm really confused now :|

  7. #7
    hbprince is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: A little advice with one really pretty girl

    C'mon people, I really need some help

  8. #8
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    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: A little advice with one really pretty girl

    There is just too many things to say about this that it would take a book size. So my recommendation is to cut your losses and start reading about this field. You can always come back in a few months and use what youve learned on her. She may even forget all the negative vibes you've sent to her. Good luck.

  9. #9
    hbprince is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: A little advice with one really pretty girl

    So should I stop even saying "Hi" to her or what ? Because I didn't really understand you. By the way I deleted my facebook, so this is not a factor anymore.

  10. #10
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    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: A little advice with one really pretty girl

    I suggest you keep it casual until you get familiar with the game


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