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Thread: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

  1. #11
    DareMe is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    Quote Originally Posted by Entropy View Post
    I find my aa is getting easier to wrestle with if I am alone, or with a wing who is into PUA culture. If, however, I am with a group of friends (AFC) in a pub or club, I find it impossible to approach. This, is of course, exacerbated if this takes the form of them all sitting there saying 'Go on, go on, just go and talk to her.' Mortifying.
    I completely agree and here's my tested solution:

    Don't tell your buddies about Game. Ever...unless they beg for tips.

    Never give unsolicited advice: I learned this the hard way by scolding an AFC who was embarrassing himself by mouth-breathing over a chick. It turned into an argument & later I felt like I had something to prove around him. Huge AA.

    Pleasant surprise is better than disappointed expectation: Now I just bail from the unsuspecting AFC buddies to open a set. It's a huge rush because I know they are watching me. After number closing, those guys were mouth-breathing over me. Haha. If you don't give them high expectations, they will be impressed with any approach outcome because YOU have proven that you are the one with enough confidence to try. This is also why women frequently find men more attractive AFTER the opener than before. Confidence is sexy.

  2. #12
    T-Mal's Avatar
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    I had a realization one day that just clicked...

    After experiencing times when I felt totally bulletproof, & anxiety never even crossed my mind, only to have the crippling "fear" of the approach the next time; I wanted to figure out what was different about those days.

    Eventually it made sense: It's not about the approach itself. Nor is it about the opener or the transition....

    For ME personally, it's about being in state!

    Those days when I was fearless & just talked to anyone & everyone, my state was where I need it to be. It's one of those things where you just know & feel everything.

    It's like I've heard others describe as "seeing the matrix"... and it's true. That's the best analogy for it. When you're in state, you can read people before you even talk to them. You can pick up on their moods or energy levels or whatever.

    It makes it easy to say just the right thing, & then your responses just flow like you're on auto-pilot. Everything makes sense.

    But when I'm not in state, I clam up.... I forget everything I know.... and I fear the approach.

    So, in order to be in state & be able to bring my "A-Game" on a more consistent basis, I try to chat up everyone I see, wherever I go. Even if it's just saying, "Good morning", it begins to get you warmed up & feeling loose & relaxed.

    After a couple minutes, you find yourself actually asking them questions, or making comments to them about whatever...

    And before you know it, you're in that proper Mindset to approach ANYONE, because you don't even care what their response is, or if they respond at all.

    You're just "doin' your thang" and being a positive, upbeat, fun, friendly guy.

    When you quit trying too hard, most of the time things automatically become easier.


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  3. #13
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    The only real key to getting ove aa is to approach until it goes away. Even then on occasion you may feel it creeeping up on you. If that's the case, I usually think of this video and it goes away.


    If you guys ever suffer from Approach Anxiety, just remember this clip. Giant brass balls can work wonders.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jxCvjD42FM& feature=youtu.be

    The next time you feel approach anxiety, just remember these guys.

  4. #14
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    The best way to keep aa at bay is to always approach people, event not so attractive girl, the goal is to keep your game always at its pick condition. It is like when you are a marathon runner, you have to always be running, even if it is not long distances every day! PUAs never get rid of AA, they just learn to live with it...and keep going strong!

  5. #15
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    I agree. Being constantly social creates great habits for picking up woman. Like not hesitating and second guessing what you will say. I feel it is also important to always portray an optimal facade of yourself. If woman see you talking to all other woman they will have uncontrollable urges of desire, self consciousness, and intrigue. For simply being a social person.

  6. #16
    DareMe is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    Quote Originally Posted by Suave Kino View Post
    If you guys ever suffer from Approach Anxiety, just remember this clip. Giant brass balls can work wonders.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jxCvjD42FM& feature=youtu.be

    The next time you feel approach anxiety, just remember these guys.
    Ah- haha! This is awesome, Suave.
    This weekend I'm going to gather a few confident wings & try to scare women away from their food just long enough to steal some & walk away like a badass. Safari Game in full effect!

  7. #17
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    lmao DareME
    "If you don't give them high expectations, they will be impressed with any approach outcome because YOU have proven that you are the one with enough confidence to try."

    I was with an AFC for a week and went he left he said the best thing I had taught him was it was okay to be direct and not care what others might be thinking when you approach them. It was like I had re-wired his train of thought on what was acceptable to women when you open them.

    The problem with someone with no-or poor game is that it's hard to bounce off each other and it makes it almost immposible to improve your own game like that. it's good to have another body to help social proofing but whenever I sarge around AFC's I don't say "Look watch this" as I leave the table to approach a HB I just do it knowing he/they are watching wishing it was them.
    My mantra is simple
    Can I own it? Can I fuck it? Can I kill it?


    DESIRE


  8. #18
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    Quote Originally Posted by DareMe View Post
    Ah- haha! This is awesome, Suave.
    This weekend I'm going to gather a few confident wings & try to scare women away from their food just long enough to steal some & walk away like a badass. Safari Game in full effect!

    LMMFAO.....bravo Dare, that is some funny ish. You better stay away from those big girls though.

  9. #19
    T-Mal's Avatar
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    I laughed hard!
    The look on the first lioness' "face" when she looked up was like "WTF??"

    LOL!!!

    Classic!


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  10. #20
    pualyK is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    Pfff It's easier to approach hungry lions than uninterested women! Haha jk.

    But some of those lions were really checking them out.

    Quote Originally Posted by Suave Kino View Post
    The only real key to getting ove aa is to approach until it goes away. Even then on occasion you may feel it creeeping up on you. If that's the case, I usually think of this video and it goes away.


    If you guys ever suffer from Approach Anxiety, just remember this clip. Giant brass balls can work wonders.

    The next time you feel approach anxiety, just remember these guys.


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