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Thread: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

  1. #1
    Virgil's Avatar
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    Default How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    Since a lot of guys want to know how to get over aa, I figured it'd be a good idea to make a thread in which we explain how we did so.

    I just posted the following in a different thread as well. It's how I got over AA.

    What I personally did was going out there during the day to open women direct (being straight up with them and telling them you think they look good, look cute, look sexy, etc.). It took me quite a few weeks to actually work up the balls, though. But here's how I did it:

    -Read all useful PUA material you can find over and over again, and really get it into your system. Especially on being an alpha male.

    -Choose a specific spot you're going to practise in. Preferably not in your hometown unless it has like 300K+ residents. Walk around there some and get used to that environment and being there. It should start to feel somewhat like a second living room. This will make you feel comfortable being there, which you need to speak up your mind.

    -Walk up to a woman and tell her 'Hi, don't scare up. (pause) I just wanted to say you look very beautiful' (you can replace that with anything else you might think of - you have amazing legs, you look very sexy, etc.).

    -Repeat that over and over again until your AA is gone. Remember that there's a little bit of AA every new day you're going to sarge, so don't freak out the next day. It'll be very easy to get over though, because you've already approached before.

    Remember that you should always come from a position of power. So always be alpha, look her straight into the eye, stand up straight, don't keep your hands in front of you, smile and use a low toned voice.

    Good luck!

  2. #2
    liquid_fun21 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    Nice advice, I personally am approaching but indirectly. I might try the direct method. But hopefully I wont exhaust my supply of girls in the area

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    dgmortal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    I think the Approach Anxiety is always there, but once you warm up you do wonders, I always crash and burn in the first and second openings most of times.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    BTW, when I said 'we' I meant the PUAs on this forum who got over aa. I wanted to gather a series of ways to get over AA so those who are still afraid can have their pick and we can use this thread to refer anyone with questions about AA here. I didn't really make that clear in the OP so I'm hoping for your additions to this thread, guys. Thanks.

  5. #5
    The-Pos is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Question Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    Do I need to get rid of aa whiles approaching HB ladies.? Or I can just act on random selection.?

  6. #6
    Virgil's Avatar
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    If you're going with my method, you're going to have to approach HB7 or higher. You have to be honest when you tell her what you think of her and women can sniff out bullshit. Besides that, if you approach the hottest of women around, it won't be very difficult to approach an HB7 or so anymore.

  7. #7
    Eternal-water is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    Actually thats an interesting plan, I may have to try it out.

    This guys filmed himself doing just that with various girls and he actually got some good responses. Of course he is also good looking so the responses won't be the same for everyone.

    Worth checking out though, they are all about 2 minutes long

    ____________________ ____

    ahh just found out I cant post them, but type into youtube "almost picking up chicks", "almost picking up chicks 2(BYU)" and "almost picking up chicks 3"

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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    Virgil is right the only way you can confront aa is to face it head on, one the things I tell myself is "What if?" what if she is the one, what if this is the moment that transforms the night, what if this is wheer I suddenly materlise into a MPUA, pressure is healthy but treat it as a learning curve the more women be it in a set or alone you open will increase your knwoledge and confidence in how to speak to the opposite sex.

    I tried wearing a mankini and a moustache and standing in a busy area maybe in a shopping mall or somewhee in a different town to where you live to start with and started telling every girl that passed me "I loved them" straight of the bat.

    Its balsy but you get the idea. Hope this helps mate.
    My mantra is simple
    Can I own it? Can I fuck it? Can I kill it?


    DESIRE


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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    Peer pressure is something that is oft ignored when considering aa.

    I find my AA is getting easier to wrestle with if I am alone, or with a wing who is into PUA culture. If, however, I am with a group of friends (AFC) in a pub or club, I find it impossible to approach. Being watched by others you are with is another form of AA - you might have removed the anxiety as to rejection from her, or what she thinks; but embarrassment in front of peers is still quite strong for me.

    This, is of course, exacerbated if this takes the form of them all sitting there saying 'Go on, go on, just go and talk to her.' Mortifying.

    So personally, to combat AA I like to work alone, or as a clued-up two man team, max.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: How we got over Approach Anxiety (AA)

    I like the idea Virgil. I'll share mine.

    I got over my aa before I even knew what it was. Back then it was just "talking to girls". It was the summer before my freshman year of college and I had a lot of free time on my hands. So me and a buddy or two would be hanging out in the historic part of town where everyone walks, and I just started talking to everyone, but mostly girls. It was all about situational topics, really just whatever popped into my head at the time. Eventually my buddies caught on and it just became something we did. We overfished those waters a bit so we did some at the mall too, but mostly it was on the streets.

    The thing that got me over my anxiety was this...I was having fun. I was talking to cute girls and even getting them to friend me on Facebook. It never turned into anything (except once) but it was still fun. I realized I loved meeting people and making new friends. It became a hobby for me.

    I guess the lesson to take from this is that I got over AA by not "getting over AA". It wasn't making my game stronger or practicing techniques or beating AA, it was just talking and having fun. Most of the pressure from AA comes from your expectations. Take those away and all you have left is good ol' fashioned fun.
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “WOW...What a Ride!”


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