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Thread: How To Get Over Shyness

  1. #51
    Spartan301 Guest

    Default Re: How To Get Over Shyness

    Shyness comes from a certain discomfort in what you're doing. Maybe it's the enviroment, maybe its you, maybe it's the women, maybe it's a combination of both.

    So what can you do? A good first step is to ease the curve a bit by putting yourself in YOUR best enviroment.

    Think of it this way, would you wanna try opening at a salsa club if you can't dance?
    Would you wanna try opening at a bookstore if you can't read?
    Would you wanna try anything with women if you really feel, and seem, out of place?

    I would start by mastering your niche. What's a niche? It's a place, a topic, and/or an enviroment where you are at your most comfortable. Example niches are meeting women at a dance class if you're a dancer, a rock concert if youre a huge fan of the band, or the UFC expo if you're an MMA fighter, student, fan, etc.

    When you go out, go out to places that you see yourself feeling in place with. Do you like the music? Do you like The Vibe? Do you like the theme? There is your niche.

    Why start here? Because you're already in a position of power and authority. This, of course, is assuming you're very passionate and/or knowledgeable about your niche. A comfortable, yet dominant vibe is a huge turn-on for women. They look for potential leaders.

    Hopefully this great first step helps. Best of luck.

  2. #52
    Dave310 Guest

    Default Re: How To Get Over Shyness

    Ragr, sounds like you're doing a good job meeting and connecting with women. Don't get inside your head about why so-and-so didn't call back. It's impossible to know what people are going through or why they act a certain way. The girl at the consulate seemed friendly and flirty with you, but maybe she didn't tell you she had a boyfriend back home. (People on vacation or in a different city will do stuff like that.) It's a numbers game. If you're getting 10 numbers a day you won't dwell on the percentage that aren't calling back. You're not alone, I do the same thing. I don't approach enough woman, so when I get a number it feels like a big deal, which makes it feel like an even bigger deal with I don't get a call back or a date. If I was getting lots of numbers, meeting lot a of ladies, I wouldn't think as much about the ones that blew me off.

    Becareful about thinking someone put a spell on you, that's what your subconscious picks up, it will make that your reality. (If you walk around telling yourself, I'm a loser, there's something wrong with me....that's what your subconsious starts to believe.)

    Hold your head up high, tell yourself "I'm the shit. Women love me." Affirmations are goofy, but there's actual science behind them. Check out a book called "The Power of Your Subconscious Mind" by Dr. Joseph Murphy. It's an old book, but you may find it helpful.

    I think it's okay to anaylze your failures. Think about what you could have done better to create a connection, but don't dwell on it. It's like you're learning a new skill or sport, you'll get better the more you practice. Tiger Woods didn't shoot par the first time he stepped onto the golf course, he had to practice like a motherf-cker. Good luck.

  3. #53
    eodice717 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: How To Get Over Shyness

    Quote Originally Posted by Bill Preston View Post
    I have found that many times 9/10s are easier to talk to then some of the 7/8s that I have opened. Once you give yourself permission to talk to them and are not needy and actually have something interesting to say - they really like it. They are not used to having interesting guys talk to them about interesting 'non-needy' things. Most guys just fawn over them and act stupid. Treat them like a person and show that you are genuinely interested in them as a person and they will open up and show you if they are worth talking to or not. Remember -not all 9/10s are even worth talking to - some are very shallow - but some are truly amazing. Judge each one on their own merits.

    B

    That alone has to be one of the best pieces of advice I've heard in awhile.

  4. #54
    Snakes's Avatar
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    Default Re: How To Get Over Shyness

    There is one main reflex you should carry with you to defeat shyness
    DONT LET THEM FOOL YOU, because if you do, you will know within minutes or hours what you should have said. Know that feeling? Thats because you was too focused on them insulting or intimidating you.

    I know this sound like shit if you have a serious problem as a selfconsious and insecure being. If you do, try out some hypnosis to chill the fuck down
    and know that i have had this problem for years up to the point of cutting my wrists because i was to scared to walk down the streets. I was feeling intimidated by everyone, including my family, people i used to laugh about, friends: everybody. The only cure for this is to walk down that street, smile, greet and talk as much as possible to everyone. You will see progression within a couple of hours, or days. After these days you will feel like a king and you will love that new power, but remember you are not a king yet because if you are gonna relax for too long. You can do it all over again.

    It happened to me time after time after time after time and i was crawling for Gods forgiveness. But he will only give you chances, he won't give you presents.

  5. #55
    ThomasJames29 Guest

    Default Re: How To Get Over Shyness

    Alcohol is NOT the answer
    Pretend like u are in a movie and watch yourself from up above if u get fucked up.....the more u got rejected that way and u look up from above on the situation the more u dont care and keep going! U JUST NEED TO START!

  6. #56
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    Default Re: How To Get Over Shyness

    thx,man

  7. #57
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    Default Re: How To Get Over Shyness

    thx,man

  8. #58
    gumpy90 Guest

    Default Re: How To Get Over Shyness

    Yes, alcohol is not the answer!

  9. #59
    gumpy90 Guest

    Smile Re: How To Get Over Shyness

    I also agree that hotter women can be easier to open sometimes

  10. #60
    gumpy90 Guest

    Default Re: How To Get Over Shyness

    sorry duplicate post


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