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  • 1 Post By meteora
  • 1 Post By jtorres2_1

Thread: I crash n' burned first time

  1. #1
    Newbee is offline PUA in Training
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    Default I crash n' burned first time

    Some background: Im 23 years old dude who plays bout 24/7 pc games. Ive never got laid and i have not much friends. I started new hobby, martial arts i wanted to improve my life. My new hobby has given me lot of confidence. My confidence has been always radically on/off stuff. (just like my lyuck with ladies)

    I just decided to approach lady directly in club first time. I wanted to approach her because i wanted to win my approaching anxiety fear. My line was "Wanna dance?" reply was no according to reactions. I approached with "30 s rule" x) Now it feels bad and I dont know how to continue my pickup career, somehow i feel great and bad.... Have you gt any tips for guys like me? what have u experienced?

  2. #2
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    meteora is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: I crash n' burned first time

    getting blown out of sets is expected, like you i too used martial arts to build my confidence (i quit about a year ago because of financial issues)(that was before i was very big into pua) i know that feeling of both remorse and satisfaction that comes from getting blown out of sets. it feels both good and bad. eventually it will just feel good to talk to girls weather you get anywhere or not. your approach was way too direct for overcoming aa, you can't pull off a feat like that unless you are very alpha and have already established alot of social proof/pre-selection, don't feel bad rejection is a normal part of your learning curve, you have to learn to improvise, adapt to and overcome any problem you have in the feild, i recomend using a less direct approach and not bothering to try to get her to "dance" until you've created rapport with her. always remember, "rejection is the key to sexual prosperity" say it to yourself every time you get blown out of a set, it is true and will make you feel better about rejection, always try to learn something from every rejection and once you've been rejected enough times, you will know alot of "what not to do", learning to be good with wemon is a skill that takes lots of practice and persistance,but is well worth the effort

  3. #3
    jtorres2_1 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: I crash n' burned first time

    Hey man, everyone here knows how bad it feels when you crash and burn in the field, especially at first. I just have two tips for you:

    1. You're always going to be continually rejected as a PUA, even the biggest pros get rejected every once and a while. Don't let it get to you, as you keep progressing you will see how the rejections will be less and less and less and more calmer each time. The difference between a PUA and an AFC is that the PUA shrugs it off and goes on to the next set, the AFC sulks in the corner and leaves empty handed.

    2. It seems you're pretty new to the seduction community, that really great, so much to learn, so many opportunities await. Are you smart and motivated? If so, you have what it takes to be a PUA. Have you read "the game" by Neill Strauss? Its an awesome book and should be step #1 for anyone interested, thats my advice. Go get the book and start reading.

  4. #4
    Newbee is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: I crash n' burned first time

    Thanks for replies! I've been reading lot of pickup stuff. I find it best to learn at field what works. I also learned about my incident.

    I felt horrible and good as you mentioned. It was soooo horrible feeling (even though that was no personal!).

    I have got guts to approach people. If my opener fits in situation 'naturally' opening is easy! If i got plans/or not what to say I will crash and burn!

    Im really confused this is so paradoxal! I bet that there will be lots of crash n burn before Im pro.

    Have you got more tips for newbies or even own stories what you did wrong?

  5. #5
    jtorres2_1 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: I crash n' burned first time

    One cool tip i could share is about how I've learned that attraction needs to be the complete package, evolution has good tools to weed out fakers, it only takes something a little bit suspicious to trigger a girls alarm and make her flake.

    I remember one time before i was into PUA in which me and a buddy approached and i opened this two set with this direct gem: "Hey, hows it going? Help me settle out a bet here, i told my friends i could totally figure out your name by guessing, help me out here *wink*". As far as openers go, her reaction was as good as i've got, she had a big smile and was really into it... at first at least. Because as soon as me and my wing starting talking, it all fell piece by piece, 20 minutes into the set both girls completely shut us down.

    Openers i'd say are 90% about the how you project yourlself, the energy, the body language. Really don't sweat the details on the opener, just learn one you like and stick to it.

    Keep learning, keep practicing and best of luck

  6. #6
    afh81 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I crash n' burned first time

    I think your opener was too direct. I know you're in a club, and people dance in clubs, but you are also probably the 5th or 12th person to ask her to dance. It's right up there with asking "hey, can I buy you a drink?".

    Keep reading through this forum, there is soo much info here. Also, read the game, check out Mysteries stuff. Look up PUA videos on youtube etc... But you are on the right track, and getting blown out is the best way to learn. It's the classic case of the stand up comic. You don't really get better until you bomb.

    Keep at it


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