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Thread: Dates!

  1. #1
    Philboss is offline PUA in Training
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    Exclamation Dates!

    When should I ask a girl on a date?
    (how many days should I wait until meeting and getting her number)
    Should I call or text her for a date?
    And how should I ask her? So it does NOT sound needy?
    Thanks to everyone

  2. #2
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dates!

    It depends on the girl, how busy you both are and how confident you are really. I have asked girls on the spot if they would like to go out many times. Usually I have talked a bit first, harnessed some attraction, am feeling confident they like me (by observing her body language) but rather than leaving and just getting a number I will completely ask them out (for a coffee or drink) and if they say yes naturally I get the number as a matter of course.

    But lets say you meet a girl at a bar saturday have a good convo and get her number. Wait a day or two (maybe monday or tuesday) and then send a happy text. See if she is still as responsive as she was at the bar. If she seems pleased to hear from me I start texting more, making sure I subtly drop in some ace but humble stories about myself and my virtues, or rekindling the connection we had at the bar and gathering intel on her too. If the person is really special and quite talkative I might ask to call them up. Otherwise I will wait until thursday or friday for a date. If she cannot clear a space in her weekend schedule for me, I gain valuable intel that she may not be fully into me, or not just yet (usually however girls decide whether they will make the effort with you quickly). If she has genuine reasons she cannot meet up fair enough. I will send her the odd text and re-organise the date for early the next week. Everything wrapped up in no more than a week. If she cannot meet me early next week I stop texting. It is not a good sign and Ive done all I can. Its up to her if she is truly interested. I will have arranged another date with someone else naturally.

    How I ask for a date is a composition of a statement, attractive offer and making it ultra easy for her to commit. Usually something along the lines of 'hey why don't we grab a quick drink thursday night, I know a really good spot. I like chatting to you so it would be fun to meet (again)'. or 'Lets go out for a quick bite to eat you know Roberto's cafe? It has the best pasta in town and a quaint atmosphere overlooking the harbour. It will be fun!'.

    Offering it as a quick thing makes it attractive because it is less hassle. You're not locking her in for the night and implies you too are not going to invest a great deal of time. Offering what you will do on the date (conversation and good food) gives her a reason to say yes. Most women want good conversation and a casual meal. Saying it will be fun or interesting amplifies this. Offering it as a statement shows enthusiastic leadership and confidence as does having a knowledge about where to take a girl on a date - or knowledge of good food or places.

    In most cases you really dont have to wait long to get a number or ask them out. As long as they know who are physically and you have built some attraction. That could be done in 5 minutes talking to someone on the street or over a week texting. Its really up to you and the girl. If you ask someone out on the street and they are a little nervous saying 'but I dont know you yet?' (this rarely happens) you say 'well thats why we should go out and get to know each other...look at me (smile) I am a happy cute guy'.

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