This is my conversation blueprint.
You have to ask yourself what makes a good conversation. This blueprint should be done at all times with people. Make it a natural part of your thinking and it will flow with out effort and you will master the art of conversation. Don't believe me? Try it. You can build tons of comfort within minutes.
Three things that make good conversation.
Lets start with the first.
Nationalism is people identifying with where they live. People root for the home sports team. People are proud of where they live. This is because their sense of identity is tied up with these things.
Culture shock is the effect of things that we don't identify with that we come into contact with. When something not what we are used to it makes us feel uncomfortable. The familiar is comforting to us because our sense of identity is tied up in it. Just remember if it is like me then I will like it.
You meet a girl from the U.K
I say: I was in the U.K before. It was lovely I got fish and chips in Kings Cross in the west end of London. It was amazing!! I crave it sometimes but no fish and chips can compare. The U,K is super cool I had a great time their.
Instant comfort. You identified with them and made them feel good about themselves. People love to feel good about themselves. And yes people from the U. K do love their fish and chips. They are quite proud of it and talking about it connects with a deep sense of identity.
Notice I did not say England I said the U.K. That's because people from the U.K say U.K not England. Do as they do.
Second aspect fun.
Talk about things other people are interested in. Don't ramble on about your pet cat unless they really love cats too. Always keep the conversation on things that interest the other person. Be fun.
The third aspect compliments.
Don't compliment people on their looks or something that is effortless. Do it on the things that they identify with. Do it on things that they have worked really hard on. Be giving and make them feel good.
I see a very stylish cute girl.
I say: Your sweater is super cute. A girl I am kinda dating would love that. Where did you get it? You have the sense of style that the girl I was talking about wishes she had. Or at least I do.
I didn't say I was taken but I didn't say I was free either. Her style is something that is part of her identity. It is something she would want to talk about. I gave her compliments.
conversational blueprint openers.
Molly? That sounds Irish are you Irish? I went on vacation there it is magical there.
The blueprint here is heritage. People like talking about this. And it is an instant conversation starter.
Learn cool facts about the world around you. Always talk about the positive. You should be warned with out some neging this will put you in the friend zone faster than you can imagine. Tease and be playful. Make the girl laugh a lot. Smile and make eye contact as much as you can.
Try it out and let me know what you guys think.