Okay you guys, I have a problem, and it always helps to write it on paper. Thankfully this website is anonymous, so i have nothing to fear. Any help and advice you guys could give would be much appreciated
You see, I'm a very intelligent, social guy in general. Some insecurities and walls, however, have stopped me from interacting with attractive women. I've read all the material anyone could ever want (probably)- (I've read Magic Bullets, 30+ forums here, and 30+ articles on girls chase, and I formulate my own information with my intuition), but it just doesn't replace in-field experience. There's a problem with that, too, however. My aa gets pretty bad sometimes. Sometimes i can manage to approach.
I'm 18, and want to get my game up before I leave high school and go to college. Whenever I'm outside of school, I have less of a problem meeting people and making friends with new people, old or young, men or female. However whenever I'm in a school environment, or even my schools parties (i usually go to other school's parties), I kinda get locked up. Sometimes even with my friends at school and people I know. I guess this is more than just a Girl issue, and its more than just my AA, but for some reason I am more uncomfortable with the people Ive known for 4+ years than a random group of people I just met. Random girls at school Ive only seen walk by- i cant dare to approach them. My AA chokes me up. Guys, I can handle.
P.S. By the way, im very funny. Great at sarcasm, making jokes, turning something serious to something comical. Just a comic at heart i guess.
But sometimes with some people I consider my friends or acquaintances, I have a tougher time speaking to them than I do to a random guy in school i just met. I think this general conversational issue has to do with my AA for women (at school especially) problem.
Yeah, i kinda digressed a bit there. But your advice would really help. Thanks in advance.
Let me reiterate that I usually have NO PROBLEMS making conversation with totally random people. I guess I use the "So what? Who gives a fark if I embarrass myself? They're random people! Everyone has a story and is interesting" (This is all subconscious). But in general, when its with a HB7+, i start to get nervous if I am attracted to her.
I'm thinking a good wingman or a bootcamp or something that would encourage me and give constructive criticism would help. Its all about feeling comfortable for me. Thats what courage is- feeling comfortable with a situation. I feel extremely comfortable with many strangers, as i believe everyone has a good, interesting side. That comfort fades if its a women im attracted to, or im in the school environment. I feel like i have something to prove, i guess. And that feeling is not justified. Being myself will prove more than "trying to prove". People say "be yourself" and you'll get women, too. Of course, there are many alterations you have to make, but most men cant be themselves because of the comfort level they have with flirting and attraction. Experience builds comfort. I have almost no experience with women
However, on the dance floor im an expert. I can hook up, make out, even get a BJ or something. But that is because it doesnt have to do with talking. I feel like there is less options you have. all you have to do is go in there, grind, feel her up, turn her around, and BAM. easy. many people don't get this too, though. Im sure seduction through verbal would be just as easy once I get it.
Anyways, yes, i keep on digressing. Guess im using this as a blog to get my thoughts out on paper.
I need to improve my inner game. and yes, i know of ways to improve it- doing hobbys, things you love, and just having a good time with your life. compliment yourself. experience new things. go out. yada yada yada.
I guess this isnt really the right website for this type of thing. Since one thing leads to another, and now I'm getting into how my motivation levels are really down. I can barely work. I mean, I have the potential to do wonders in this world. But my motivation and my drive are really low. That makes me not feel like going out, doing things. Also, it makes me procrastinate, making me feel like i have no free time, because i waste it all on forums, playing games, or even just walking or listening to music. Yeah, its one big problem, one big slippery slope. My lack of motivation leads to me having AA.
And now that im already this far, might as well list more of my issues to add to my story. You see, my friends, i dont REALLY have toooo strong connections with many of them. i have about 3 really close friends. Buddies, you can call em. People that will stick with you through anything. the rest of my "friends"... i feel... are acquaintances.
I have reaaaally deep conversations with my closer friends, from things about the universe and meaning of life to really personal issues and the future. Also, i can pick up conversations with strangers for HOURS, and i mean HOURS.
Yeah, this one post turned into a psychology report. but hey, one problem leads to another, and this all has to do with me and women.
The only way to get over this is by creating drive. and i guess the Domino Effect would happen.
anyways guys, thanks for listening. digressed much, but any advice would be appreciated i guess