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Thread: Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

  1. #1
    Bandit's Avatar
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    Cool Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

    If you've read The Game, or have been interacting with other people for more than a month, you know that there are two types of guys. Guys that are good with girls, and guys that aren't. There's no reason for it, they don't have any training and they don't have to be attractive (the most annoying ones are the douchebags that are uglier than you. You know the one's I'm talking about). But they always get the girls. Why? Because they're naturals.

    Naturals, as they're called in the community, refer to the guys who have never heard terms like PUA, neg, cocky funny, dhv, or any other term we use on a daily basis. Nobody's taught them, except maybe a few useful pointers from their older brother or getting "the talk" from their old man. These guys just instinctively know how to get girls. They don't think about it, they don't plan it out, they simply
    do. And that's why they're so successful.

    These guys can be the most frustrating thing in the world for a growing PUA. In fact I'd bet it's safe to say a lot of us harbor resentment towards these guys, even if it is just to hide our respect. But we really shouldn't. We should be thanking them. Cause it's by watching these guys that our forefathers learned how to do what we do. Now I don't know about you, but why would you want to try and get the look-alike, when you can have the original?


    That's one of the problems with the community today. Hell it's been a problem pretty much since pickup started. We've all been trying to be Master Pick Up Artists, the big shots who know all the tricks to getting women. But at that level, picking up women isn't even a conversation anymore. It's a
    Choose Your Own Adventure book where you already know all the right answers. It's all thought, patterns, procedures. It's all artificial.

    Imagine walking up to a girl, being completely comfortable, and having a great time talking to her. She's really into you, and on some level you know that, but you're having too much fun just seeing where thing's lead to give it a second thought. Before you know it, her number's in your phone and you're on the way back to your place. You're not entirely sure how it happened, but you're not complaining.


    Now, which sounds better? I don't know about you, but I'm partial to door number 2.


    In Zen philosophy, there's a term known as
    mushin. It's one of the tenets of Zen, and it's literal interpretation is "no mind". It means to meditate and practice an activity until it can be done without thought, whether it's kung fu or watercolor painting. That's the kind of approach that you should have towards PUA.

    The simple truth is that if the whole time you're talking to a girl you're wondering whether you should have disqualified her already or if you're showing too much attraction or if it's ok to touch her this way, you're going to fail. Not because you're doing it wrong, but she won't feel right about talking to you. At the very least she'll think you're not really paying attention (because you aren't).


    You need to get to the point where you can game a girl without thinking. There's no easy way to do this, the only method is practice. That's what is going to make you great. You have to keep trying and trying until eventually it's just like muscle memory. That's when you can put the conversation on auto-pilot and enjoy the ride.


    Now, you can't just dive into this without knowing anything. The fact is, you have yet to learn what those other guys already know.

    1. Girls love confidence. They go absolutely crazy for it. It's the most attractive quality a man can have. So get your frame right and have your inner game nailed down.
    2. Girls love to laugh. And believe it or not a sense of humor can be learned. But this is another thing that takes practice. It's not something that can be taught.
    3. Girls want what they can't have. You can't just throw yourself at a girl and expect her to appreciate you. You've got to make her work for it, and deep down she wants to work for it, cause it'll be all the more enjoyable when she gets it.
    4. Girls want the best. Whether it's shoes or clothes or even hair, they want the best. That means you have to be the best. The trick is you don't have to actually be the best guy out there, you just have to act like it. And eventually, it'll be true.
    5. Girls love attention. Look them in the eyes, touch them, reward them when they do something you like, and most importantly take it away when they do something you don't. Hell take it away just for the hell of it. Make her appreciate your attention. Make her crave it.

    I could go on, but that's really all you need to know. The trick is how to embody those. And that's why we developed cocky-funny, push pull, DHVs, Kino, body language, and everything else. It all boils down to these 5 ideas. And after all the routines and lines and openers have faded out of your arsenal, this is all that's going to remain.
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “WOW...What a Ride!”

  2. #2
    Autismus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

    Quote Originally Posted by Bandit View Post
    Naturals, ... a lot of us harbor resentment towards these guys,
    Yeah!

    even if it is just to hide our respect.
    ...*sigh* yeah


    Before you know it, her number's in your phone and you're on the way back to your place. You're not entirely sure how it happened, but you're not complaining.
    Great post Bandit! All truth. Reminds me of something a fictional character once said: "I'd rather have luck than skill" lol
    DTF HB's omw 2 LTR

  3. #3
    dgmortal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

    Nice post bandit
    Btw I believe naturals are not born, they are made, go watch some Zan Perrion stuff. Zan Perrion is a natural who most MPUAs dream to be. but he wasn't born a natual, he was a AFC untill his early twenties and then decided to become good with women
    If it frightens you, Do It!

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

    This post needed to happen and it is about time that it did. Not many guys could have written it, but if I expected it out of anyone it was you.

    Guys won't understand. The ones who eventually do won't need to read this anyway, but it's important for the others to know that it's there. When they become "the best" and think that they've done everything required to find happiness, let them remember this post.

    I have trouble believing guys like TD and Julian are actually happy, and if they are it's not from the validation of all the women. I think there has to become a moment that these guys sell out--they start pitching something that sells instead of something that's true. The practice becomes redundant. Sticking to your convictions is an ideal sold rather than kept.

    Or maybe it's just that few guys do actually get there. I always thought they must be keeping it a secret because it wouldn't sell, but the longer I stick around, the more my hope for humanity (and men) dies.

    I think Ciaran got in over his head. That's why he said it was all dark side. Pickup in itself isn't bad, but you've got to know when to get out. Stick around and the mentality will eat you alive. Go beyond natural and you'll hate your life. There's nothing glorious about getting ANY girl you want. Reduce them to science and you might as well die.

    Reminds me of the book Flowers for Algernon. When you're retarded (an AFC) life is still fun because you're too stupid to know that people are making fun of you, but when your a genius (an MPUA) you see the light, or rather the darkness. Hope dies when you see humanity for what it really is.

    Get good, but not THAT good. It's too bad RSD and PUA Training don't promote this, but business is business. With great power comes great responsibility, but few and far between are great men.
    Wondering where I am now? Check out my latest project:


  5. #5
    TheManSohan is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

    After reading this and have conversations with friends last night who I actually do care about and I am grateful to have in my life. I decided to actually write a statement of what I want out of all of this and what I have gained and how to further myself in it. Having a direction is good and without direction we as humans are lost, anyway here is what I have written and even though I'm still learning I believe this is worth reading everyday for myself.

    What do I want?

    What I want is to go out and approach as many times as I can but not to make it my life. Go to a club and gain numbers then find someone I want to take home. There needs to be more conviction and there needs to be a point where I wouldn’t be afraid to throw myself into the deep end and there shouldn’t be this fear, this fear is going away and I will shove that fear out. Just do it, it’s not hard, no one will judge you if you fail and if you do all you will do is learn to do it better next time.

    demonstrate higher value, gain social proof, and make friends with people you don’t even like because you can make them leave when you want them to but they will serve you in the short term. Remember this is your reality. Be happy with what you have and don’t take shit. Be the dominant, be the one who’s always in charge. Treat people how they should be treated. If they don’t like what’s happening then you don’t need their approval, just carry on because you know you’re doing it right.

    You have that cocky-funny persona; you know how to Disarm obstacles, you know how to Push-Pull, you know how to lead. You have practised body language for so long that it has become natural to you, the same applies for touching. If you feel that a girl is hooked to you then you have the freedom to do as you please. If you fuck up you fuck up, nothing bad is going to happen and there are plenty more women out there to practise on.

    Be yourself but be your best self. Don’t settle for mediocrity. Some nights will be bad, some nights will be awesome. Accept that sometimes it’s just a matter of chance. Have that passion and charisma because you know you have that and it can be replicated. You are the best out there and any woman who shuts you off is an idiot and has blown it with you. Have fun and play, after all it is just a game. I would much rather be a one hit wonder than a phony.

    P.S. I didn't mean to hi-jack this thread. I just wanted to share how I felt on this whole matter.
    I am only responsible for what I say, not what you understand - The proverb of a true activist.

    I'm not driven by fear, I'm driven by Danger

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

    Awesome post. I think the point about 'no mind' is especially important. Since I've started a meditation practice, I've noticed it's much easier to talk to people without my mind wandering or becoming self-conscious. Essentially, I have become more present in my everyday life.

    Practicing mindfulness in whatever you're doing is essential to success. I highly recommend starting a meditation practice. You can do it at home but I think you will get more from it if you get instruction from local practitioners. If you search 'meditation' and 'your city' you'll likely find lots of free meditation sittings to go to. The people there are usually very cool and have great attitudes on life.

  7. #7
    sidewinder89 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

    Ok I'm hearing what you're saying and I do agree. My goal is to become so natural that I don't need to think of things to say, routines etc etc.

    But - seeing as how I'm just starting out - is it not the case that I am naturally going to have to start in the scripted non-natural fashion? I feel I need to learn the meta-physics of why these artificial tactics work and internalise that knowledge before I become more natural.

    The key to becoming a natural is to practice... my battle is with my inner game that keeps telling me I need rountines to be interesting... If I go purely natural I just run out of stuff to say ; S

  8. #8
    brodeisel is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

    Maybe i am an oddball out there. I a new to PU, but no way do i wanna memorize lines. I Just wanna learn the outline and fill it in with my own words. Night game seems meh to me. I would much rather do day game and have no competition. I just need to get over some aa i have and i feel like i will be golden. Kinda went a little off topic, but I hope i can help prove to some of you that not all of us newbs wanna be a robot.

  9. #9
    Suave Kino's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

    Why all the melodrama? This topic seems so incredibly overblown. In any other area of life the "best" play to their strengths. Think Mike Tyson vs Muhammed Ali; vastly different styles, same results.

    I am naturally cocky funny, but cocky funny doesn't work as a pickup style for me. Sure, I have the natural elements but it isn't the path I choose to travel when I'm melting women. I prefer connecting on a deeper more personal level with strong sexuality because that's my strength.

    I have a friend that is an amazing natural PUA. When he is in the zone he is breath taking. He is freaking mind blowing his style is so fluid but sometimes he just isn't in the zone. When he isn't in the proper state man I have seen him struggle.

    My style is consistent, on any given day regardless of mood I can connect with a woman on a deeper level and I'm perfectly ok with that. My buddy tried to convince me that routines were somehow inferior to his method, but the truth be told on those nights were he was struggling I wasn't. I'm consistenly lethal. He learned to respect my style, even if he was never going to use it.


    If you want to learn to run natural game, great more power to you, I do it quite often. If you choose to run routines, more power to you, I do it quite often. The bottom line is as an aspiring PUA, choose the path that best fits who you are and stick to it. There is no right way to game except the effective way.

  10. #10
    Bandit's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bandit- The Importance of Being a Natural

    I'm not talking about Natural as a style, I'm talking about Natural as a level of game. It has nothing to do with how you do things or what kind of game you run. Kino, you've been in the game for a while and you're one of the best I know. You can't tell me that your routines and lines and tactics don't come naturally to you by now. You don't have to think "ok, time to dhv, now which one should I use?" You just know it and do it. That's what I was getting at.
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “WOW...What a Ride!”


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