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  • 2 Post By Marbles

Thread: Social Anxiety Tips

  1. #1
    Marbles is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Social Anxiety Tips

    I know a lot of guys on here get the old social anxiety. Here are a few things I've noticed in my own behavior that I work to correct. If anyone else wants to chime in, I'd be glad to read it.

    1. Silence is okay. When I started branching out socially, thoughts would rush through my head like "I'm not talking enough, I'm talking less than other people. What I said wasn't high enough value." etc. etc. It's much better to be silent and projecting confidence and comfort in the situation than to try to hard engaging in the conversation. Let the words come naturally, when you feel good about an input. It's good to strive to be a good conversationalist, but if you're trying too hard you just come across as desperate. When its 3 AM and you're driving someone back from a party, you're both tired. If the person you're with is burned out, observe this. It's more important than interacting with them.

    2. It's okay to hurt people's feelings a little, especially when you can spot their underlying motives. If a girl is clinging to you and makes requests of you like "call me when you get back home," don't cave too much. This shows weakness and a desire to please, and shows you are easy to control. There's nothing wrong with being nice, but don't overdo it. If your neurons are tweaking and you just really want to call her because she gave you attention, stop and look at the situation logically.

    3. Nothing is a big deal, especially arguments. Don't be afraid of them, but don't look for them. There will be many miscommunications in your life, get past them from a place of calm.

  2. #2
    getwell is offline Banned
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety Tips

    Thank you for sharing! I smoke when I am nerveous. It can help me to be more confident surround many people

  3. #3
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    KnightTurner is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety Tips

    I really like your first point. Personally, I don't talk much but when I do, what I have to say is of high value. Doing this will get people more interested and make them want you to say more as opposed to the other side of "God, would he just shut up already" that people will often feel if you're just blabbing on. Once you're isolated with a girl though, you better be talking and keeping her attention

    It's really important though to be a good conversationalist. Learning when and how to say things can make the difference between an f-close and going home alone.
    DOOOOONNNN'TTTT CAAAARREEEEE

    You are the prize. She needs to earn it.

  4. #4
    Insist24 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default My personal way to break approach anxiety.

    When I build up Approach Anxiety in my mind I usually do this one act and I get really relaxed and get into a playful mood so that I can jump right into a conversation with a woman.

    All I do is pull out my cell phone and talk into an empty phone. You can have a fictitious conversation with anybody and talk about anything to get you into the right mood for a real event.

    It might seem a little crazy but as crazy as it is, it really helps me out in many situations. Oh yea, you might want to place the phone on vibrate/silence first though, because it would be very embarrassing if the phone rang while you were supposedly speaking into it.


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