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  1. #1
    Reformd AFC Guest

    Talking Funny Pickup Lines - Use At Your Own Risk!

    Funny Pick Up Lines - Pickup Lines That Work If Done Right!

    Pickup lines that make people laugh, some sparing no expense. Some lines will make them walk away; some may stick around for more of your funny self. There's no denying that there is power in a funny line and that it takes great skill to successfully use it to pick up. Just keep in mind that everyone always has room for a good laugh. If they don't, they're not looking to go home with anyone and you probably won't be interested in them anyway.

    The word of the day is "legs." Let's go back to my place and spread the word.
    I'm not Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bedrock!
    My magic watch says that you don't have on any underwear. (She says yes I do) Damn! it must be minutes fast
    I don't know much about pies but DAMN you make my banana cream.
    I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me?
    Crap. Something is wrong with my cell phone. {Oh Really. What is that?} Its just that...your numbers not in it.
    A cat falls into the water & the rooster laughs. What's the moral of the story??? A wet pu**y alway's makes a happy c*ck.
    What has 148 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My Zipper!
    There are 206 bones in the human body... do you want another one?
    Screw me if I am wrong, but haven't we met before?
    If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.
    You may fall from the sky, you may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall... is in love with me.
    Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
    Was your Dad a baker? Because you've got a nice set of buns.
    See my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I'm cute.
    Do you have a keg in your pants? (No! Why?) Cause I'd like to tap that!
    That shirt is very becoming on you, but if I was on you I'd be coming too!
    You know what would look good on you? Me!
    A boy gives a girl 12 roses. 11 fake, 1 real and he says to her " I will stop loving you when all the roses die"
    If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.
    Do you work at subway? Because you just gave me a footlong!
    If your left leg is Thanksgiving, and your right leg is Christmas, can I visit you between the holidays?
    You're like a prize winning fish. I dont know whether to eat you or mount you.
    Say "I bet I can kiss you on the lips without touching you." and kiss her, then tell her you lost the bet.
    Do you want to do math? Let's add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and multiply!
    If I followed you home, would you keep me?
    Are those space pants? Because your ass is out of this world!
    I've noticed you noticing me and I'm just giving you notice that I've noticed you!
    Do u sleep on your belly at night? If no, can I?
    If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
    Are you a pirate? Cause I want cho booty.
    It's a good thing that I have my library card. Why? Because I am totally checking you out!!
    Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
    I want to tell you your fortune. [Take her hand and write your phone number on it.] Your future is clear.
    Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
    I may not be the best-looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
    Is that a ladder in your pants... or the stairway to heaven?
    My socks are having a party, do your pants want to come down?
    Are you a parking ticket? Because you've got FINE written all over you.
    Let's have breakfast together tomorrow; shall I call you or nudge you?
    Do I know you? Cause you look a lot like my next girlfriend.
    Do you work for Cingular, Cause you're raisen my bar!
    Do you have a mirror in your pocket? 'Cause I could see myself in your pants.
    You turn my software into hardware!
    People call me John, but you can call me Tonight!
    If you were a burger at McDonald's you'd be the McGorgeous.
    Hi, my name's Fred, would you like to test my bed?
    Can you take me to the bakery? Because, I want a Cutiepie like you!
    Hi, will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into this cheap motel room across the street.
    Did you have lucky charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious!
    If you were a booger I would pick you first.
    [man] Excuse me, would you like to dance? [women] NO! [man] Maybe u didn't hear me.... I said u look really fat in those pants!
    Do you know karate? Cause your body's kickin!
    Hey Girl let's play lion get down on all fours and I'll stick my head in your mouth!
    I have a snake and he wants to enter your garden.
    You might as well sleep with me because I'm going to tell everybody we did it anyway.
    Excuse me, if I go straight this way, will I be able to reach your heart?
    If I had a garden I'd put your two lips and my two lips together.
    My love for you is like diarrhea, I just cant hold it in!
    Would you sleep with a stranger? [No] Then Hi, my name is...
    You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.
    Can you kiss me on the cheek so I can at least say a cute girl kissed me tonight?
    I must be in heaven because I'm looking at an angel!
    My name's [your name]. That's so you know what to scream in bed.
    Your eyes are bluer than the Atlantic ocean, and baby I'm lost at sea!
    Roses Are Red, Candle Light Flickers, After The Meal, Its off With The Knickers.
    If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
    Did the sun come up or did you just smile at me?
    You're ugly, but you intrigue me...
    Is your shirt felt? (No?) Do you want it to be?
    You don't sweat much for a fat chick.
    I'm gay, think you can convert me?
    If you were a laser you would be set on stunning.
    Here's $. Drink until I am really good looking, then come and talk to me.
    If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be a McGorgeous.
    Somebody call the cops, because it's got to be illegal to look that good!
    I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you.
    There are angels in the world are playing, are sleeping and of them is standing in front of me.
    Could you please step away from the bar? You're melting all the ice!
    Did it hurt when you fell? [Girl: Huh?] When you fell from heaven?
    Are you a clock? Cause you're ticking me off.
    Polar Bear (HUh) I just wanted to break the ice.
    Bond....James Bond
    Are you form Tennessee? Cause you're the only ten I see!!!
    Lets play house, you be the screandoor and iIll bang you all night long.
    If you were a car, I'd wax and ride you all over town.
    Are you a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you.
    What do you and the weather have in common? You're both Hot!
    Are you a Hurricane [name]? Cause you're blowing me away.
    Can you lick your nipples?
    [No] Can I?
    [Yes] Can you show me?
    Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
    Go up to a girl, ask her: "Do you know what winks and screws like a tiger?" [No] Then wink.
    Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?
    Violets are blue, roses are red, what is it going to take to get you into bed?
    Love is four letters so is what me and you should do (other person: whats that?) F*CK
    I'm the Six, do you want to be the Nine?
    Damn boy there's only things I like riding up my ass, my G-String and you!
    I would die a million deaths if it meant I could be with you!
    Damn girl, you make me feel like a loaf of bread...I wanna rise up in your oven!
    Are you a gardener? I have a bush that needs a trim.
    Can I fish in your pond since all the others seem to be dry or closed?
    I'm going outside to make out... care to join me?
    (To someone working somewhere where a counter seperates you) You're like a drug to me. Good thing you're over the counter.
    We're like Little Ceasar's, we're Hot and Ready.
    (She asks you the time) Its two flirty and the date's with you and me.
    (steps on some ice) Now that the ice is broken, what's your name?
    Girl you so fine I wish I could plant you and grow a whole feild of y'all!
    I'm going to need a tall glass of cold water, cuz baby your making me HOT!
    Hi, Iím Mr. Right--I heard you were looking for me.
    A tall man to a short woman: "You're perfect height for what you want."
    Girl you're like a car accident, cause I just can't look away.
    Is your name mickey? because your so FINE!
    Last edited by Reformd AFC; 02-11-2009 at 11:37 AM.

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