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  1. #1
    mackdaddyjacK's Avatar
    mackdaddyjacK is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Pointers for pick up and how to not be all commando style

    I know a lot of the things we hear in the pick up community is about commando style and sarging like a boss but I have a few words to share on these concepts since I have started having success breaking the rules and had no luck following everything by the book so to speak.

    1. aa:
    It's there it doesn't go away but there are some things you can do to ease the pressure. Have a ladiback approach to pickup. Don't go commando style since those guys are all about big talk and having flair. Not everyone is a real charmer like myself (I am not a real charmer) so often we need to improvise. Following the proverbial book on pick up I found myself failing time after time and becoming overly frustrated with girls I hit on dancing with other guys (jealousy), seeing other guys win with women I wanted to approach (envy), or just being plain overly assertive (insecurity). Here's some pointers for overcoming AA.

    Don't be the washboy who begs the girl for the number, or begs her for a first date, etc. You will set yourself in a trap where you are stuck begging for her affection which is giving away your power and making you the victim not the conquerer. Make it subtle. I noticed going for the number sometimes is never subtle but if you build momentum rejection is like water off a duck's back. To further explain this if you find yourself begging like a poor boy for the girl's number, or asking her to go out with you when you first met she will run for the hills guaranteed. I have made this mistake so many times where I got needy and was like "Uhh can I have your number and we'll talk?" all whiney or "Can I take you out sometime?" all immature and it backfired terribly in my thoughts and future interactions with these women. I either pissed them off or scared them away. Because after acting like that it didn't stop I was still acting needy in my texts, vm's, etc still begging for their affection. We must demand not ask! Never ask for a women's advice or permission, presume the sale and close the deal! By doing this you won't be so needy later on to be texting her multiple times a day after she stops getting back to you or whatever and your texts being all about impressing her with funny, cute, or silly. This never worked for me so don't try it. Just be cool and be different with your texts but don't be all trying to make her laugh or make her flirt with you because it will backfire and create a "always try to please her attitude" which is very bad!

    2. Kino: One word of advice, Don't! My biggest barriers to success with women has been trying to do kino and everytime I screw it up and the girls get weirded the heck out and hate my guts for it in the end. They give me major beef for it later, give me the cold shoulder, etc. Don't do kino unless you are a super pro who is like a natural Don Juan. I don't know why Kino is so awkward for me but it creeps girls the heck out! For me it is one of the worst ways to pick up women and maybe the most frustrating when first meeting women. Keep it casual and don't attempt kino till the first date and even then keep it very lighthearted. Be ready for girls to do kino on you though since when that happened it shocked the heck out of me and I wasn't ready so I rejected her which caused this girl to blow me out afterwards since I was acting like a creep. Be ready for their kino! Oh I wish I would have been ready for kino since a HB9 tried to do a makeout session with me when I didn't even think she would talk to me and it cuaght me off guard and because I wasn't ready to have sex she ran for the hills! Oh how I will always regret that!


    3. Gaming: Whatever you do keep it light. Don't try to be funny, don't try to be macho, just try for goodness sakes to be normal! Girls hate weirdness so go with the flow and try with all your might to be as natural as possible when talking to women. The hottest HB's boyfriends don't act like weirdos so neither should we to win their affections. Just be laidback. Don't make your night out to be all about approaching women because you will be thought of as a scumbag. Just be cool and calm and try not to draw too much attention to yourself. Make it seem like you are just seeking advice for something or just making a comment about something.

    My best approaches work when they are in the moment and situational. I never use lines and always go on the spur of the moment. Always think before you speak. Don't approach a girl just to prove something to yourself, think first about what to say to her then act. My worst approaches have been when I was anxoius about her leaving or rejecting me and approached with nothing to say and said something completely stupid. The times I have succeeded were when I was thinking about what to say then went out and acted on that instinct and it flowed much more smoothly with less regret. If you got nothing nice to say don't say anything at all and even if you see your perfect 10 don't approach unless you got something cute to say. Obey your instincts and don't be all commando style about it be cool! You will feel better about yourself in the end.
    Last edited by mackdaddyjacK; 01-27-2013 at 12:39 AM. Reason: Revising my thoughts

  2. #2
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Pointers for pick up and how to not be all commando style

    I have to disagree about the Kino part. I think it is an essential part of game. If a woman gets creeped out, then you you simply did it wrong. Women don't get creeped out if you shove them by pushing their shoulder. Or when you do a palm read. That's all kino. Now if your going straight in to hold her hips and rubbing her back, then you jumped way too far ahead.

    You do make some good points about the approaching. aa doesn't go away. You just have to deal with it and push forward. And we do need more of a reason to get her number than to just "hang out sometime." That's just pitiful.

    I know what you mean about acting natural while gaming. Beginners do a lot of over the top kind of things. But that's it right there. They're beginners. It took me nearly 3 years to get comfortable with my game fully and I think I stopped the over the top stuff after 2 years. It's a process that should be respected and not rushed. If they are doing over the top stuff, they'll understand eventually. They are learning to calibrate to how social settings work. Some of these guys have barely talked to a woman before so of course they have no idea how to actually control their nervousness and not do over the top things. But their goal SHOULD be to become more natural and not try so hard.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  3. #3
    azzmanforever's Avatar
    azzmanforever is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Pointers for pick up and how to not be all commando style

    MackDaddyJon, I'm a relative newbie but I find that your approach usually works REALLY well, especially with daygame and quieter environments. In the evening, at high energy environments like crowded bars/clubs, I find that your approach still works, but when you see a girl you like, you need to go more into sarge mode because you don't have that much time to interact.


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