When you’re out & about & you see a girl you want to approach, how do you feel? Do you get nervous? Do you struggle with what to say or how to act?
The key to a successful approach is to have fun! Don’t worry about the outcome.
Here’s a technique I’ve used that has been very successful: “Assuming Familiarity”.
What I mean by that is, when I go to approach a girl, I act as if I already know her… kinda like we’re old friends. (Or at least have been previously acquainted in some way. ) Smile big! Have lots of upbeat, positive energy… and have fun!
One way I’ve done this is to walk up & outstretch my arms to give her a hug while I look her in the eyes, & smile… & say “Heeeeey You!!!”
In a club setting this works amazingly well! It’s flirty, it’s bold, it’s direct. It expresses confidence & fun. And you can get pretty much any girl to give you a hug at pretty much any time, as long as you don’t come off as creepy or unsure of yourself.
After that, I go into teasing & bantering… just making a playful interaction.
What happens is, the girl either thinks that she knows me but can’t remember where from, or she’ll play along with me knowing I’m flirting… & sometimes they’ll ask if we’ve ever met.
If they happen to ask if we’ve ever met… I’ll say, “Of course silly! You couldn’t have possibly forgotten already… We just met like 10 seconds ago, when I came over here & hugged you… Your short-term memory is either terrible, or you were just completely caught up in the moment I guess.” & then wink at her & give her a playful nudge with your elbow.
Also- if she doesn’t ask if you’ve ever met before, you can always ask HER & use the same idea… “So, do you remember when we met? …..You DON’T? Ohhh my! Well it was like 10 seconds ago when I came over & hugged you. What’s up with your memory?? “ *wink, nudge, smile
The thing is, you’re NOT trying to pick her up! You’re being fun & friendly… sociable, flirty & just goofing around.
There’s no pre-determined outcome. You are JUST meeting people & having a good time.
However; this technique CAN produce rapid attraction & allow you to “pick her up” if you maintain that same fun vibe & continue being flirty.
People feel more comfortable around other people they already know.
So, when you “assume familiarity” it has a subconscious effect on both you AND her, which puts you both more at ease. It disrupts her defense mechanism / b!tch shield & lets you glide in under the radar.
Now, what happens if she doesn't react positively?
You keep moving on to other girls nearby & do the same thing.
She’s gonna see you hugging all these different girls & think you must have a high Social Status / social value. (And so will all the other girls!)
When girls see other women accepting you, it makes you more attractive because they become curious about you.
And chances are, if a girl DOES happen to respond negatively at first, she’ll track you down a little later to ask for a hug! (Seriously! That’s happened before!)
The girl was in a bit of a pissy mood earlier in the night… but later on she tracked me down & talked to me, asked me for a hug & bought me a drink! All because I didn’t let one silly girl ruin my state.
Notice that I didn’t use some big scripted opener/routine… I didn’t ask for a “girl’s opinion”. I didn’t beat around the bush & pretend I wasn’t interested…
I said TWO WORDS & hugged her. That’s all. THAT was my opener.
From there, I wasn’t worried about transitioning into a conversation… I was just being fun & flirty. It didn’t matter what I said... All that mattered was, my body language & attitude.
So the next time you’re nervous about meeting a “stranger” change the way you think about it. Assume familiarity & act as if you already know her.