Awhile ago, when I first began my PUA journey, I read about how the dancefloor is a deathtrap. Well I'm here to tell you that it...is...not.
I spent years developing my PUA skills and through my experience I asked a reasonably simple question. Why can't I use pickup on the dancefloor? I mean...women come out to these things to DANCE. Not just drink, hang with the girls and, (if desired) meet guys. So why not use pickup during this situation where they get the most enjoyment out of their night?
I had a friend who I had first learned the power of seductive dance from. He helped me, indirectly, create the foundation that was to be my dance game. He could pull any woman on the dancefloor and actually makeout with them without one single conversation. Except he could never take them home. That was his sticking point. Which is a whole other story. So I had to figure out how he pulled it off. And make it better.
For over a year I slowly tweaked my dancing skills to see how far I could push. Applying basic PUA concepts and using them in my dance. I wanted to see how far I could get with a woman with just dancing, on a consistent basis. And I like to think that I have finally come upon the holy grail of what is Dance Game. Hopefully this will help you, my friends. Let me know what you think.
Rule #1: Use Push/Pull
This is a very common PUA concept, but not really put into the context of dancing. If you are familiar or skilled with push/pull this will be obvious to you, but maybe not so obvious when it comes to using it for dancing.
There is a cycle you have to use. You rotate between pulling her close to you then pushing her away. With every pull you get closer to her than you did last time.
1st Pull: Start by looking into her eyes and smiling while there is space between you two. Then move your bodies closer.
2nd Pull: Work on getting your cheek onto her cheek (on the face you weirdo). You also want to hold her. NOT place your hand on her waist. But GRAB her firmly, not tightly. This will prepare her to follow your lead through dancing which will also help lead to that kiss.
3rd Pull: Here you want to graze your nose against her neck. So she knows you are smelling her. You are going to throw out the soundbite "You smell nice." (more on those later)
4th Pull: Now you want to put your forehead onto hers. Look into her eyes if you can. Once that is done move your mouth to the side of her cheek almost touching the edge of her lips. Now you want to lightly brush your lips right next to her mouth.
5th Pull: And finally the magic. You, again, lightly brush your lips against hers. This is such a tease that if she doesn't kiss you then, she will definitely let you the next time you swing those lips back around. So just GO FOR IT!!
In between each pull you have to push. This builds the tension while you are dancing so that the next time you go back in you will be able to get closer to her. So when you graze your nose on her neck and tell her she smells nice, you push her away. When you come back in again you then work to move your forehead onto hers. Get it? Good.
The way you push is just as important. One tip I actually got from a female friend of mine. She told me that if I pushed her away like I got a boner and had to calm down that it would drive her crazy. Now, that doesn't mean you grab your crotch in order to hide said boner that actually is there or not. What it means is that you have to look like your losing your cool. That she is AFFECTING YOUR GAME.
You do this by blowing air when you push her away. A simple "whew" will suffice. You can even add in "I need a min." The other favorite of mine is waving my finger at her as if saying "No no no. Your charm won't work on me." This implies that SHE is the one gaming US with her provocative dancing.
A push could also be used to grab a drink. Either with or without her. Use your best judgment for that call. If she's totally into you and about to tear your clothes off, then don't be a jerk and buy her a drink! So walk away and tell her you will be back for her. This is more leading and compliance which is what you want. Rinse and repeat everything in this section. This is more of a guideline. You should always feel free to mix things up once you get comfortable with these techniques.
Also, watch the eyes. They never lie. You will get used to it over time. If she looks at you she is comfortable. If she looks at your lips then she's ready. If she looks away then she may have a bf. If she looks at her friends then she is either doing a bet or trying to make her guy friend jealous. Yes it did happen to me once. But don't single anything out. If she is not looking at you that doesn't mean she won't later. Just use it as a general guide.
Rule #2: Never Battle
This is a simple, yet effective tool. It got to a point where I wasn't just being complimented on my dancing from strangers, but I also had guys coming up to BATTLE me. Like I just got into a role in You Got Served! DO NOT fall for this trap. If you enter into a battle then you are no better than a standup comedian putting on a show. You have become the dancing monkey.
There will always be better dancers. I am definitely not the best. But the WAY I do it by using these techniques gets me way more women than any breakdancer who spins on his head for everyone. If you are challenged by a break dancer, simply egg him on to put on a solo performance and cheer for him like the rest. While he does his dance tricks you could be gaming the girl next to you. Maybe his girl. 0
Rule #3: Use Soundbites
Have you ever danced with a woman and tried to ask her 2-3 questions that she just couldn't hear? That is just nails on a chalkboard to me. She is there to dance, not talk and get to know you (At least not yet). I found the best way to talk is to use soundbites. These are essentially short sentences about things you observe. Whether it be the weird chain she has around her neck or the creepy guy sneaking up behind girls to try and dance with them. By the way, DON'T EVER DO THAT. Use short sentences and hand movements to talk with her.
You can even ask them very simple questions such as "Hold old are you?" "Whats your name?" and "Top or bottom?" I'm kidding about the last question. These can seem very uncreative at first, but in an environment of loud music and dancing, these are golden.
If she begins asking YOU too many questions that break the soundbites rule then take it as she is ready for a full blown conversation with you and Isolate her.
Rule #4: Have fun!
Be playful, humorous, high energy. These things are contagious for women on the dance floor. It also makes it easier when you do your approach. If they see you as a social guy who just goes and does what he wants she will NOT refuse you as long as she observed your behavior. You can literally go up to her and grab her hand. I have some opener tips for dancing, but this post has already become longer than intended. I guess there's always something to say.
As a bonus, here's a quick list of dance techniques I use. They are generally not hard to learn and you can find dozens of video tutorials on Youtube. Also, I need to mention that I have never had more women literally run up to me than when I did basic salsa step.
-Basic salsa, merengue, bachata.
-Tutting (still amateur myself)