My success in recent times has been considerable. My text game has broken many bounds, and I am now efficiently shooting game over Facebook while feeling natural, yet calculated. Overall, I am transforming into the person that I have always wanted to be.
However, I am having a new problem coming up when approaching women. I find myself rapidly imagining great approaches and conversations when I am in vicinity of initiating one, but that is the problem. They end up remaining thoughts and plans, but they never pull through in physical form. If I take that first step, I can easily roll from there, but many years of being forced and programmed into filtering my thoughts and keeping them to myself has created something that now hurts me instead of helps me.
Coincidentally, just as this problem has come up, an answer has come along with it at the same time, and I have been field testing this and have found considerable improvement in my ability to take the first step.
For those of you who are not familiar with it, TED Talks is basically spreading and talking about unique and interesting ideas. One of the speakers on the site, A.J. Jacobs, often likes to experiment on himself. From acting out the bible, to living healthy, he has done some very absurd things.
One thing that Jacobs did was for one month he said the truth... All the time. He did this in response to an article that said that you should never lie. His response to this adventure is appropriately labeled "I think You're Fat".
As I was listening to this, I thought about something. For this guy to basically tell someone if they looked ugly or if he didn't like them must have taken a lot of balls. And then I began to think about the idea of social conditioning. If you do something over and over again, it will eventually click in as natural and instinct. So that's where I got my grand idea of how to cure my inability to act on my thoughts:
Tell the truth.
I decided to basically force myself to say whatever was on my mind, whether it was bad or not. The goal of doing this was to break down the machine of conditioning I had built up for a decade. In turn, this would allow me to act on a heartbeat instead of imagining me acting on a heartbeat.
Here's an example of what I put myself through.
The other day, I was sitting in the caf having lunch with a group of girls that I usually have lunch with. They were babbling on about emails and such, but I really wasn't listening. I wasn't paying attention because I was focused on my kickass shrimp and lobster stir fry, and frankly I couldn't care less about the boring topic they were talking about. Eventually, one of the girls goes.
"Wow Swagman, you're awfully quiet today, what's up?"
Taking this as an opportunity to break down my walls, I said:
"Well frankly your conversation is extremely boring and I have no interest in it because it is not on anything that I would be dying to know about, so I have taken to myself and my shrimp."
The girls were shocked. One of them goes "Wow, well ummm, what should we talk about?"
I could have gone into Nice Swagman mode here, but I'm working on trying to kill that sneaky bastard too. Already having jumped off the cliff, I decided that a trick or two wouldn't hurt, so I whipped out Sassy Swagman.
"I don't know, do you have anything that would be interesting to me whatsoever?"
These girls at this point were just literally like "Who the f--- is sitting across the table from us?" One of the two was laughing though at my "out of sorts" display. I decided at this point to pull the parachute chord since I accomplished what I wanted to and I initiated the conversation, controlling it from there. I taunted one of the girls at a point on eating disorders and releasing her inner fat person, and that making love was a form of burning calories. They both couldn't stop laughing on that one.
I learned another thing in that episode right there besides furthering the destruction of my old social machine. I learned that even a bad thing, if said in boldness, strength, and a lot of confidence won't hurt your chances. In fact, it may even help you by showing you are a man who doesn't take crap for nothing.
My success has been considerable. I am finding it much easier to say what is on my mind, and initiating conversation is becoming easier. I'm also slowly starting to speak in the manner that I would love to speak in. Overall, I must say that this approach to fixing my action ineptness is working.
If you're having issues saying what you want to say, and doing what you want to do, take a shot at this. Just don't do it on your boss or teacher