One of the questions I've been getting most often lately is, "What is flirting?" or "How do you flirt?"
Here's what flirting ISN'T:
Having a great conversation with a girl.
When a guy talks to a girl about all the things he has in common with her, a lot of times he thinks things are going great & the girl is "really into him".
But that's not necessarily the case.
That's called, "Building rapport".
Yes, rapport IS important, but it's NOT what you want to focus on in the beginning stages after you meet a girl.
When you understand this, it can help accomplish two major things:
It can help keep you OUT OF the "friend zone"... and it can eliminate the problem of trying to think of "what to talk about".
A lot of guys worry about keeping a conversation going, or running out of things to say. That's usually because they're unknowingly trying to FORCE rapport too early.
It feels unnatural, so it becomes difficult.
Here's the thing; it IS unnatural to work on rapport that soon. That puzzle piece doesn't fit there.
That's why you have to build ATTRACTION by flirting.
So, what is "flirting"?
Flirting is being playful & silly... & using teasing / bantering.
Razz her, joke with her, make her have FUN.
Playfully bust on her about her awkwardness or inexperience with specific things.
If she sucks at bowling, then give her a hard time about it.
If she spills a drink, make a comment like "Oh that's cool... I can't take you anywhere nice." & wink at her with a playful smile.
If she likes to dance, (whether she's good or bad at it) tease her about forgetting the moves to 'Dance Central'
If she's having a bad game of pool or darts or whatever, bust on her & tell her she's "never gonna make the next shot".
Make little "bets" with her...
"If you make this next shot, I'll buy the next round... but if you miss, YOU'RE buying!"
Poke at her, give her a playful elbow nudge or hip-check/bump... flick her on the forehead with your finger.
If she says something ridiculous, look at her with a puzzled look & say something like, "Did that make sense in your head?" or "Hmmmm... you may want to think about NOT speaking for a while..." *then give her a devilish, cheeky smile & gently shove her away on her shoulder.
THAT is flirting.
THAT is how you're gonna stand out from most other guys & build attraction.
THAT is what's gonna make her want to see you again... as well as, keep seeing you in the future.
THAT is going to keep you out of the friend zone.
So, don't confuse "having a great conversation" with flirting... because they're not the same thing.