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  1. #1
    mackdaddyjacK's Avatar
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    Default Not sure where to go with this HB9 Bartender

    So I have been talking about this chick for a while on here. She is the HB9 bartender I keep bringing up at the Club I go to. Well last weekend we hit it off hard. Well I don't know where to take it with her. I need some advice. I'll give you guys a breakdown and a preview of my game plan and if you guys could tell me what I should do.

    The Breakdown
    Met her last year. Nothing happened. When I first met her kinda flirted with her, told her she was cute, she blew me a kiss, loved watching me dance, and dropped hints that she would be working that following Saturday. Don't know what happened but she wasn't there maybe she meant Saturday in general not sure.

    This year saw her once and was mad at her so didn't approach her even though she was checking me out. Later after I got over myself I re-approached her and we started hitting it off.

    I was working on my game and just thought of her as practice at first since I was in such a PUA mode I didn't care anymore what happened in the past and just kept moving forward. Well come to found out I started to get feelings for her. I asked her if she was seeing anyone and she told me yes and gave me his name. I was very interested in hearing her share about him and sounded very positive about the situation.

    Turning her on
    Coming out of that short convo she showed some very strong IOI's after I simply asked if she was single. She started staring me down hard and wiggled all hot and bothered I was very turned on by that and could tell whatever I said made her wild.

    After confirming BF status
    Realizing the women I have been meeting lately I know most of them have BF's and will tell me right away if they are committed. However many girls have said nothing about their BF, gave me their #, agreed to D2's, and only told me they had a BF when they got sick of me or I made too many mistakes. I realized from this girls are not always stuck on their BF but actually as the story goes just want to have a good time and often just give me a chance in spite of having a BF to see if I can prove myself.

    Knowing this I knew this girl would be the same way showing no signs of interest if she was committed but going wild if she wanted me. Going into with this frame the BF had no value to me and I just started treating her like she was fair game.

    Later down the road
    My theory proved true. She started warming up to me in spite of having a BF proving I either made her wild or she wasn't that committed. She continued to show interest, give me heavy sexy eyes, call me baby, blowing kisses, etc.

    At first I thought this was just all in good fun until last weekend when things got a little more serious.

    The turning point
    So I have been talking to her pretty steady since Feb almost like every weekend and getting really comfortable around her and she is coming around. She talks to me now and actually wants to hold a convo beyond something just friendly.

    Last weekend she turned up the heat though. Bartenders for one never hit on me and part of it is just her personality with all the flirting but now she is starting to invest and admitted that she likes me.

    How to proceed to the next step
    I am beside myself. I have been showing pre-selection up in there like mad. So far she has seen me with over 6 different girls doing all kinds of kino, convos, etc. I was doing this to make her jealous and create a jealousy plot line to which after much avail has succeeded. She is invested now no doubt.

    Last weekend she opened up to me and gave me a long story, showed interest in my activities, was watching me all night, kept checking me out, and lastly did kino on me!

    I can't believe this chick pulling kino out of thin air like that. It got me very hot and bothered. So I was standing there running game on her and she reaches out her hand and played kino on me and we played kino hand pulling.

    Later she pulled this stunt again and looked at me all hardcore and did the kino thing again. She just couldn't get enough of it.

    The Unfortunate Reality
    This is all going on while she is seeing someone which makes it hard for me to know where to take it. If I move in too soon she will shut me out, if I move in too slow she will hate me for it. I need to move at just the right pace or I will be done.

    I really want to spend the Summer with this girl and not sure where to take it too fast or too slow I told her for us to get together this Summer. She soaked it up and was like "So, we are planning out?" (very amused). For the record I told her we should hang out this Summer last time I saw her and she totally blew it off and said nothing. Now she is showing compliance and actually including herself in my suggestions. I was doing this to check compliance and got it like mad.

    Not knowing how to take this I told her I have to get her # sometime and she agreed. I gave her a good line and she was speechless.

    Playing my cards right
    So I am definitely not going to get oneitis for this chick as I am still approaching, going to keep approaching, keep showing pre-selection to her, keep trying to game women, etc. This is not going to slow me down. Usually when I get oneitis I hone in on one chick and forgot about all the rest well not this time. Still going full force all in.

    I want to play my cards right with this girl so I can hook up with her and spend my Summer with her. Basically last weekend blew me away. She is seeing someone and wants me. Now I am pretty sure I could easily bite the bullet over text or make a wrong move and kill the attraction.

    My Struggle
    *So how do I stay on good terms with her without being Mr. Nice Guy waiting all patient for her to break it off with her BF which won't happen.
    *Can't ask for her # before Summer or I will get a definite sh!t test as I have tried doing other stuff that wasn't congruent and got the shaft. Sometimes I pass but more times I fail
    *Can I get her email as I can try to keep gaming her?
    *I don't want anything to do with her before Summer because that is when I have everything going on.
    *I don't want to take her out before that because I won't be congruent and will almost 100% get oneitis by not polishing my game
    *How can I escalate this situation to a deeper level?

    My Game Plan
    *Once I get her # during Summer have my first text will say
    "Babe it's time for summer fun I saved your # as "Hot Babe" -MackDaddyJon" (I plan on calling her babe, hot babe before this)
    I have already gotten away with calling her Hottie, Hot Stuff, and she calls me Baby.
    *If I get her email I have no idea how to handle that.
    *During Summer if I get her # if she texts me back before I leave the Club should I ask her if she wants to talk after work?
    *Or should I go for the first date which will be a Beer Fest?

  2. #2
    Icarus's Avatar
    Icarus is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Not sure where to go with this HB9 Bartender

    You have a text planned for a number you don't even have yet...

    Just let that sink in.

    You are way over thinking this, and honestly taking all of the fun out of dating; and you won't get oneitis with this girl because you already have it.

    This girl has a home court advantage; you are going into her bar, she knows you are seeking her out. If you really want this girl, you need to push for an interaction outside of her bar because I don't see this relationship advancing much at her place of employment...

    Also keep in mind that she gets hit on 100s of times a week by 100s of different guys; she's used to it by now. Her job is to flirt and sell more drinks, I know the thought hurts but keep that in mind.
    Rule Number 1: You are not a PUA.

  3. #3
    mackdaddyjacK's Avatar
    mackdaddyjacK is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Not sure where to go with this HB9 Bartender

    Quote Originally Posted by Icarus View Post
    You have a text planned for a number you don't even have yet...

    Just let that sink in.
    LOL you're funny. Just letting you know I totally agree with you and you have a very good point. But I have some questions. Don't you think this is okay since I am just trying to create canned material? I mean I use texting templates all the time. Like for first texts and the like.

    As you may know my friend the texting game is way hard to play and win. Out of the 12 #'s I have gotten I have lost every time. I either never get a response the 1st time, stop getting responses after a while, get next-ed, etc.

    This is why I am putting so much energy into learning because it is very hard to predict the outcome. More times than not I play to win and try to just have fun but end up in the ditch.

    Quote Originally Posted by Icarus View Post

    You are way over thinking this, and honestly taking all of the fun out of dating; and you won't get oneitis with this girl because you already have it.
    True that yes I need to try harder. You are totally spot on because there was this HB9 I saw upstairs in the same room as the Bartender and even though I approached her I could have pushed it and I didn't. This HB9 on the dance floor I approached was very quiet and talked to her twice and she just looked at me very unamused. But I have seen this hot and cold behavior before and I know it means nothing. Man I should have asked her to dance, or talk, or something but I was stiffled by the bartender like you said.

    Hopefully I won't back down again like this major AFC move I made here. I need to keep pushing it like you said, get over my oneitis, and just let the HB9 bartender be like my side project.

    Quote Originally Posted by Icarus View Post
    This girl has a home court advantage; you are going into her bar, she knows you are seeking her out. If you really want this girl, you need to push for an interaction outside of her bar because I don't see this relationship advancing much at her place of employment...
    Wow that's funny you call it a relationship I was afraid to say that but yeah I felt the same way. Well anyway I think I understand the dynamics a little and that's why I have been showing pre-selection, creating a jealousy plot line, gaming her hardcore, etc.

    Now I did tell her already about doing something this Summer and she agreed. Wouldn't that essentially meet your expectation to get her outside the venue? Or are you being a little more suggestive, just maybe you are saying I should be more suggestive?

    Quote Originally Posted by Icarus View Post
    Also keep in mind that she gets hit on 100s of times a week by 100s of different guys; she's used to it by now. Her job is to flirt and sell more drinks, I know the thought hurts but keep that in mind.
    Thanks for the pointer but again I think I just need to do what you said and forget about her and focus on my game and let things develop naturally. Thanks for your help I feel a little less obsessed with her now. That helps me cope with my oneitis now I feel better about my inner game. Now I can focus on pushing it!


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