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Thread: Should you wait for eye contact before approaching?

  1. #1
    Mystik is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Should you wait for eye contact before approaching?

    I don't post a lot here so please forgive me if this has been covered recently.

    I've heard various opinions on this. Women when giving advice will usually say you must have eye contact first before approaching them otherwise it comes across as being "creepy."

    However, in the pua community I don't usually hear this so much. Some just say it's ok to just walk straight up to them and say "hi" "hello" or whatever. I'm just wondering what the consensus around here is.

    Also, let me say that in my opinion it seems that if I were to wait for a woman to give me sustained eye contact(say EC that is lasting more than a second)I would possibly be waiting the whole night so to me waiting for it doesn't make a lot of sense especially when she might be doing that with a lot of guys.

    Even worse would be to wait for them to smile at me. That happens occasionally but I think EC lasting more than a second would be much more common than the smile.

  2. #2
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    The Red Baron is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Should you wait for eye contact before approaching?

    NO!!!

    If you always wait for eye contact you'll open like 2 sets a day.

    Open open open.

    But that said, if you get eye contact, you MUST approach immediately.

    Here, I cover it here. Somewhere in the second half of the main post, there's a discussion on a warm opener, thats after you get eye contact

    http://www.puaforums.com/how-approac...g-closing.html
    Never need praise, sympathy, or approval



  3. #3
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    Default Re: Should you wait for eye contact before approaching?

    Would you also like to wait for them to say hello before you talk? Be a man and approach her, whether she gives you eye contact or not. It matters not one bit about whether she looks at you. If you do see her checking you out though, then it is a definite go ahead to go and get her. Either way, though, if you see a woman you are interested, go balls to the walls and fire up that first interaction with her.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  4. #4
    Mystik is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should you wait for eye contact before approaching?

    Well a couple of weeks ago two HB9's smiled at me in a bar but I was with someone so I didn't approach. I also didn't approach either one because they were with a group of people. I probably wouldn't normally approach women like that who weren't smiling at me but after that experience I probably will not wait for women to smile at me or look at me. Thanks for affirming what I already suspected.

  5. #5
    stew_ma81 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Should you wait for eye contact before approaching?

    Stop thinking about it. 3 second rule. End of. ANy longer you start arguing with yourself or they think your creepy. Just remember though to let your wingman know whats going on if he isnt aware of the 3 second rule, otherwise he will be a bit unprepared.

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    Mystik is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should you wait for eye contact before approaching?

    I don't use a wingman. Also, I think the 3 second rule is way over emphasized in the community. I can see it's value but I think it's kind of silly. As long as you don't sit there for an hour or even five minutes then it's ok. I say approach as soon as you feel comfortable. You can't just go up to her and not know what to say. You have to have some sort of plan. Yeah, you don't need eye contact from her. I get it now. That said I don't think it's a good idea to sneak up from behind her or should you approach directly. From an angle is the best way to do it from what I understand. I actually had a very attractive woman(about an HB8)tell me not to approach women directly(after I approached her directly)because it was confrontational and made her uncomfortable.

  7. #7
    stew_ma81 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Should you wait for eye contact before approaching?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mystik View Post
    I don't use a wingman. Also, I think the 3 second rule is way over emphasized in the community. I can see it's value but I think it's kind of silly. As long as you don't sit there for an hour or even five minutes then it's ok. I say approach as soon as you feel comfortable. You can't just go up to her and not know what to say. You have to have some sort of plan. Yeah, you don't need eye contact from her. I get it now. That said I don't think it's a good idea to sneak up from behind her or should you approach directly. From an angle is the best way to do it from what I understand. I actually had a very attractive woman(about an HB8)tell me not to approach women directly(after I approached her directly)because it was confrontational and made her uncomfortable.
    I already have a couple of openers already in my mind. I know dont need to think, I just approach and something always comes out. Its the escalting bit which I am working on.

    I see a girl and bam Im chatting, I dont allow myself to think.

    Last night I was just making them up on the spot. Its my personal challenge to just approach and open without a plan and see what happens.

    To be honest the randomer the better, its just an opener nothing more, nothing less. Its where you take it from there that counts.


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