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Thread: Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

  1. #1
    SteadySargin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Smile Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

    Hey guys, I'm new here and getting into pua, but I'll make this as detailed as possible...

    Here's what's been going on...

    At my job there's this girl who's new and has been there for a few weeks now and I'm not sure what I should do exactly.

    When I first met her she had been working for a few days and I didn't know what her name was so I asked her and she smiled when she gave me her name and I gave her mine then later I went over and talked to her, but the convo was kinda f-ed up because we didn't really talk about much except where we went to school and then after that there was an awkward silence before we had to get back to work. Also keep in mind she's the "quiet type" of girl that doesn't really talk much (she told me that her family is loud and that she's the quiet one lol) Later when she was leaving I said "bye" to her and said "I wish we had more time to talk" and she asked whether I worked the next day or not and I told her yea (sounded like she was still interested) and I planned on talking to her the next day, but we were so busy that we didn't have time to talk and at the end of the day she left without saying anything to me so I wasn't on her mind.

    Recently when I come in during the day and she sees me she says "hi" and smiles and I do the same back to her, but I don't say anything to her if she's busy or not looking at me and I wait until she acknowledges me. After a couple of weeks I gave her a hug once after I she said "hi" to me one day and she hugged back so it seems like a good response, but I haven't done much else since then. I also showed her a video of me on my cell phone of me at the shore showing her what she missed out on since she didn't want to go with me and laughed, but didn't say anything else (showed dhv since I like to go places???) She also looks back in my direction periodically during the day (for whatever reason and I doubt its work related) and she smiles every time she sees me whenever I come into her area whether I talk to her or not. And she also comes back to my area to say "goodbye" when its time to leave while smiling and I say the same and smile back.

    What I've been doing around this time was slightly negging her a bit (in a funny way like talking about her height), talking to the other girls in her area instead of her when shes there or not, being playful with the other girls in my work station and hers when or not, but not with her, and used one push-pull tactic on her (last week). Got a good emotional response from the Push Pull tactic. I'm also alittle playful with her from time to time and might do something subtle but that's about it and we go our separate ways.

    IDK what I should do since as you can see I've been going all over the place with different tactics, but I definitely messed up when I first started talking to her and didn't build much of a rapport, but I sense a little bit of comfort between me and her. Thing is I think I should try to go back to step 1 and start talking to her again to build a rapport when we have time or should I keep going from where I am and either keep building attraction by doing the same stuff or just step to her and either build a rapport or N-close. I could straight up get her alone and ask her out, but it doesn't sound like a good idea.

    Also keep in mind (didn't know where to put this.)

    We only work a couple of days a week and some of those days we're both at the job together and we see each other a quite a few times a day, but we don't work directly with each other but we're in close proximity. She's also the quiet type and doesn't really say anything to anybody and I even asked other people if she was quiet and didn't talk much to them and they said she's the same way so I know she's not only like this with me. I also don't know if she's single or not, but I'm assuming she is for the time being.

    Thanks please help

  2. #2
    Zeus101's Avatar
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    Default Re: Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

    If she is shy then it will normally take longer to build comfort with her, especially at work during which there will be other people around watching. Ask her harmlessly if she wants to grab a coffee before work sometime - that way you can take her number so to arrange where it is your are going and what time etc. Then you'll have her number so can talk to her outside of work also. You may find she opens up more outside of work as its just you and her, not lots of other people watching and listening.

    -Zeus
    Wise men don't need advice, Fools wont take it - Benjamin Franklin

    Stick a 50 note onto your forehead and talk to a stripper.. If you can get her to not think about the note, you are gold.

  3. #3
    SteadySargin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

    Quote Originally Posted by Zeus101 View Post
    If she is shy then it will normally take longer to build comfort with her, especially at work during which there will be other people around watching. Ask her harmlessly if she wants to grab a coffee before work sometime - that way you can take her number so to arrange where it is your are going and what time etc. Then you'll have her number so can talk to her outside of work also. You may find she opens up more outside of work as its just you and her, not lots of other people watching and listening.

    -Zeus
    Ok good tip, but the thing is She's always scheduled to work earlier in the day goes on break way before I get there and when I'm on break shes normally working and doesn't have time to talk (unless its for some small talk or teasing) and shes around other people too. She usually comes back to my area to say bye to me later in the night so I'm thinking I should go ahead and make a move and ask for her number then and there. High risk/reward but it seems like the only shot I have while we're there even though there might be some people around or stay near the exit around that time but I doubt my timing will be right so I'll probably go for the former instead of the latter.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

    In that case then go for your approach, when she says bye, just say something like "Oh are you finished now? I was meaning to come find you but have been too busy - i was going to ask if you wanted to grab a coffee sometime?" or something similar. see how that goes

    -Zeus
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  5. #5
    SteadySargin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

    Yea I'll go for the approach, but I'm still thinking about whether I should just ask for her number right then and there and start texting her or just do what you just said?

  6. #6
    Zeus101's Avatar
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    Default Re: Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

    All i can do is offer you advice bro, i cant tell/make you do anything! I've told you what i would do give your situation, but make your own decision.
    If you do take my advice, once you get her number you can still text her that night, your first and only text doesnt have to be about coffee - this was just an excuse to get her number. But arranging for coffee at some point would be a good idea.

    -Zeus
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    Stick a 50 note onto your forehead and talk to a stripper.. If you can get her to not think about the note, you are gold.

  7. #7
    SteadySargin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

    Alright cool thanks

  8. #8
    cesar3003 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

    Quote Originally Posted by Zeus101 View Post
    In that case then go for your approach, when she says bye, just say something like "Oh are you finished now? I was meaning to come find you but have been too busy - i was going to ask if you wanted to grab a coffee sometime?" or something similar. see how that goes

    -Zeus
    +1

    Ok guys, as we're already in work related topic I have a question. I've used to see a girl at lunch time at work now and then, seemed a bit shy, possibly stressed as always seemed to be in the rush and always on her phone at the table. I don't know if she still works there as haven't seen her for a while but if I do it might be my last chance for a while to do anything, so any advice you could guys give? I was thinking of saying 'Smile, life's not that bad opener' but I think I might need something better?

    thanks

    C.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

    Quote Originally Posted by cesar3003 View Post
    +1

    Ok guys, as we're already in work related topic I have a question. I've used to see a girl at lunch time at work now and then, seemed a bit shy, possibly stressed as always seemed to be in the rush and always on her phone at the table. I don't know if she still works there as haven't seen her for a while but if I do it might be my last chance for a while to do anything, so any advice you could guys give? I was thinking of saying 'Smile, life's not that bad opener' but I think I might need something better?

    thanks

    C.
    An opener just has to get the conversation flowing without being too boring. With your opener she could just smile/laugh it off then thats it - end of convo. One i use to open girls that are working in shops is "I fancy myself as quite a magician but you dont have to be a mind-reader to know exactly what you are thinking right now" - to which she responds "what am i thinking" or "go on then" , then i follow up with "When on earth is it time for my lunch break". Nice little convo starter i find. But experiment and you will find your own that work for you

    -Zeus
    Wise men don't need advice, Fools wont take it - Benjamin Franklin

    Stick a 50 note onto your forehead and talk to a stripper.. If you can get her to not think about the note, you are gold.

  10. #10
    SteadySargin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Quiet/shy girl at work....Need Advice/Help

    Ok update....I got her number tonight when she said bye to me and then text'd her about an hour and a half later using T-MAL's texting guide (Texting Do’s & Don’ts: “The Conversational Bible”) to send the first text to her. I botched the text slightly because I left out a word but the message still makes some sense it just sounds like broken English and if she asks what I was saying I'll just tell her again. Either way it'll reach her emotions.

    Anyway she didn't text back yet since it was already late at night when she left and when I sent the text so she'll probably get back to me tomorrow then and I'll keep running the text game on her.


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