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  • 1 Post By Fesaz
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Thread: Approach. Stay there. Don't move.

  1. #1
    Fesaz is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Approach. Stay there. Don't move.

    Went for a walkabout around my area and stumbled across a park that basically didn't look like a park from the outside. I wasn't really in state, had been studying and needed a quick break.

    Hot girl walks out and I immediately ask her
    Me: 'Hey, what is this?'
    Her: 'Its [name] Park!'
    Me: 'really? it looks more like a private mansion to me..'
    Her: *laughs*

    Silence followed as we held eye contact for a good while.
    I eventually walked away (gave in to the pressure from awkward silence ) into the park but SHE REMAINED STOOD RIGHT THERE. I'm thinking I should have stayed right there and made an assumption about her to keep the conversation going.

    I dubiously re-approached asking whether she was waiting for someone to which she replied her dad. Here I could have reframed it into me keeping her company while she waited and got her number in that time.
    But again I walked away, I didn't know what to do next at the time.



    The main lesson imo was don't leave until she leaves or she gives thorough DOIs.

    Would appreciate any feedback on this
    thanks
    If you want something you've never had before you've got to do something you've never done before
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MzpWT66Km8E

  2. #2
    Swagman's Avatar
    Swagman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Approach. Stay there. Don't move.

    Ahh, I remember when I had this problem. It's now minor and I'm rapidly improving on it. All it requires is:

    A. Lots of conversation
    B. Lots of studying

    The more you talk, the easier you discover it is to just go with the flow when you are in front of someone. Being autistic, it was an extremely difficult problem for me to just maintain a random one-on-one conversation. Now, it isn't as hard, and I get more enjoyment out of it. However, I have my occasional moments where I still have trouble. My usual problem is when the person I'm talking to becomes distracted by something else. I feel that in time, this problem will go away too

    As for studying, check out the videos on youtubes. Sasha Daygame is a favorite of mine. As for books, check out How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  3. #3
    Bballking is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Approach. Stay there. Don't move.

    Don't over think this one. You had the guts to re-approach, something I may not have been able to do. Tell yourself you didn't know what to do but you've seen the results, which are nothing more than a little remorse, and will change it for next time. Hindsight is always 20/20. At best she may have enjoyed a few minutes of convo with you but then her dad shows up and your stuck feeling awkward about asking for her number and have to make a quick exit. You've seen the negative, now you can change it.

  4. #4
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    Devil_dog is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Approach. Stay there. Don't move.

    Just go out in a park one day and talk to many many girls. Maybe you will answer your own question
    What you need will not come quickly. WHAT YOU NEED TO DO IS WHAT YOU FEAR. Take comfort that what you seek is there. But you will NEVER have it if you keep being a p$ssy.

  5. #5
    JafariFTW's Avatar
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    Default Re: Approach. Stay there. Don't move.

    That sounds painfully awkward...and ive totally been there.

    The answer though is simple;

    First theres you...then theres the unknown girl...then theres the park.

    Since its your first time meeting you freeze up thinking about what to talk about, but if you stop thinking and absorb your surroundings you realize the park is what you two have in common!

    And thats how you establish a connection, by talking about things you have in common...You could have asked "How long you been comin here?" or "what do you do at this park?" or "when did you stumble upon this park?"

    Options are endlesss and if you just stop thinking so can be the conversations.
    -"Dependence is only a state of mind, Independence is a state of being, because in the end all we really have in the world is ourselves"

  6. #6
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Approach. Stay there. Don't move.

    you got her number ~ how did it go? you should be hooked up by now.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Approach. Stay there. Don't move.

    I don't know man I will have to try it out that is the approach, stay there, don't move method. This sounds pretty Alpha to me. I think there would be a point where you should walk away so you don't hover or look weak but a point where you leave early too that could frustrate some women. And again always about having that perfect balance of attraction of knowing when to walk away and when to stay. If you applied that idea on every approach you would definitely go AFC but if you applied it to say the girls that are a little harder to win over you might be golden.

    I will try spicing up my game this weekend by trying this out and seeing what I can do to improve on it. Also I usually jet when I get an IOD or run out of things to say but maybe I should try something different for a change, who knows?

  8. #8
    Fesaz is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Approach. Stay there. Don't move.

    Quote Originally Posted by mackdaddyjon View Post
    I don't know man I will have to try it out that is the approach, stay there, don't move method. This sounds pretty Alpha to me. I think there would be a point where you should walk away so you don't hover or look weak but a point where you leave early too that could frustrate some women. And again always about having that perfect balance of attraction of knowing when to walk away and when to stay.
    I see what you mean. The main idea was making sure the reason I jet off ISN'T because of the pressure of the situation, I'd need to work through it if I ever want to get comfortable with approaching hot girls at random in the day.

    Thanks guys
    If you want something you've never had before you've got to do something you've never done before
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