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Thread: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

  1. #101
    Rod27 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    She specifically said i misinterpreted the comment on the Alaska cruise and apologized. Just like she said we can do the birthday next year but not now. She meant she hoped we would be friends next year to do those things. As far as the flowers.....if some other guy sent flowers, I won't. You are right.

    I can't text her that....first I have a son and can't get away anywhere. Second it will validate any mistrust she has about me being selfish, as well as validate her decision that I'm not the responsible, quality man she thought I was. She definitely has trust issues...she told me and her friend told me. It will be a very slow process to regain trust.

    You should get rid of the jealousy strategy with this woman. All it did in the past was make her really angry, and I don't want her to rehash the past....plus it validates the mistrust. She isn't a young college chick.

    I haven't apologized any more or acted needy or angry.....those things I have going for me.

    I already spoke with her friend Maria, another head nurse on the same floor. Maria helped me a few years ago when we had a breakup. She has a family as well and can relate that we all want the same thing. She said to not give up on Carol, but don't push her away. Carol is feeling like I may "pull the rug out from her again" and doesn't trust me. She is just expecting for me to fail her again. Carol is trying to fix and find herself these days....before I could get clarification on that, there was a code blue(dying) and she had to hang up.

    I don't want to sound harsh or ungrateful.....I am extremely grateful. I just need to communicate to you as much as I can about her character since you can't see her or know her.

  2. #102
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Rod there you go again making the same mistakes over and over.You shouldn't have spoken to maria.
    did you really understand what she told you.yur woman decides who comes in or goes therefore seeking her colleagues help is dlv to me.


    first I have a son and can't get away anywhere.

    You were being invited out in this dyn whether you liked it or not.it was almost you were specifically requested for.you don't need to show her proof.

    Second it will validate any mistrust she has about me being selfish, as well as validate her decision that I'm not the responsible, quality man she thought I was.
    To her currently you have shown a wussy side of you and maria must have heard it.she probably saw some indicators from her. but due to recent happenings she is deducing you slow yur role.If her reaction or observation is based on what shes sees you have garnered or haven't garnered why focus on that too much

    She definitely has trust issues...she told me and her friend told me. It will be a very slow process to regain trust.
    Attraction is a faster route.you know that.

    She specifically said i misinterpreted the comment on the Alaska cruise and apologized. Just like she said we can do the birthday next year but not now.

    You made her loose attraction today.thats what an unattracted woman may do.it doesn't mean it can't be salvaged.Lokk today you messed up.Period

    She isn't a young college chick.
    SHE IS A WOMAN.you just put a ring on it.they are just that awesome get over it.

    She said to not give up on Carol, but don't push her away. Carol is feeling like I may "pull the rug out from her again" and doesn't trust me. She is just expecting for me to fail her again. Carol is trying to fix and find herself these days
    Am not going to go deep into what exactly that means but you don't have time.the opportunity lies in that piece.

    FYI:You do not know your wife at all never act like you do rem frames

    Send her that if you may this a new slate text just copy and paste.it won't make her jealous it does many things on loads of levels. i can guarantee if you send her that you will amp attraction.Period.

  3. #103
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    One more thing that story actually happened to me and thats where i got the line from. i included other elements for you cause i thought you deserve this girl in your life
    yes i had a group of friends we slept over at one of theirs and invited girls.and there was this brazillian HB babe very hippy who used to ask of me.it think it started when i had a conversation with her mum(she was moving up and about at that time).i was friends with her bro.she was in town for a bit.

    I have used some dhvs for some friends(in life) and on this forum that actually happened to me.i did not want you to look like me when i first started and was unsuccessful a few times.i believe in your ...but know your a taking action kind of guy and ..

    Since i have had affairs n i can tell the direction you are going and the outcome and i must tell you can salvage this.

    You know what seek that nurses help even though its dlv and pursue her with flowers even though you said you won't.remember her reaction this morinin she could actually put distance between you.Probably it may not get to that but if you want to create RED HOT ATTRACTION and acknowledge you made a huge mistake and must fall on this route you may update this thread.yep its starting all over from the point of the morning after yur done with the new slate text if you may.

  4. #104
    Rod27 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    So you are from across the pond?(mum)....explai ns why I can't understand some of the messages you type, as well as this forum might reformat sentences wrong. There are also spaces or periods .....in the middle of the sentence that throw me off.

    Quote Originally Posted by HardRock View Post
    unsuccessful a few times.i believe in your ...but know your a taking action kind of guy and ..

    Since i have had affairs n i can tell the direction you are going and the outcome and i must tell you can salvage this.
    Yesterday I finally know where she is at. We never communicated for the year(text and email and lawyers are a sh1tty way to communicate).....it' s very easy to misinterpret things. I finally know and it's CLEAR.

    Today is the first day of the rest of my marriage and family. I need to give her space. I will try attraction but it has to be very subtle.....it can't make her feel uncomfortable. Dressing up and looking good at the door, being fit, and being strong and consistent are the ways I do this. I am agreeing with her by just saying i want friendship. I've screwed up plenty of times too with other women.....they never came back until I stopped pursuing them.

  5. #105
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Dynamics change and if you feel like there has been a shift the situation must be adaptable.

    Going the friend route is not really bad but attraction starts now.you must take game serious if you don't mind creating attraction in this woman.FAST

    i was actually waiting for her bro and her mum engaged me.the girl was not too far from where we were.at first she was moving up and down about her business then ,i saw her pick and magazine deep into the conversation(with her mum) and sit and not far way from us. am not from brazil.

    Attraction starts now

    The truth is what you may be delaying and can do another person may ignite in less than 30 secs.thats the power of what your currently on.

    As long as you are pursuing her without coming across as needy in yur situation its okay.remember you will be seeing this woman often.BE PREPARED

    its not shocking you like girls and they like you too you are very adaptable and even though sometimes you are very cautious you sound like you will DO WHAT MUST BE DONE by FOLLOWING STRUCTURES overall do not delay.
    Most dynamics i have run into have forced me to be a bit adaptable becos you hit them with one they hit you with another question.Its like they want a bit more details.
    The friendship frame is great for now but it means you are also telling her it ok to see other guys.its almost like giving a green light subtly.if this is not coupled with attraction soon enough you may get relegated.

    If you have agreed verbally it ok
    its best to accept the frame and get in character if you haven't actually said it loud out.

    either ways it good. but the key is what you do with the momentum built.girls have told me why did i take so long.some have gotten angry at me somewhat.

    i still pickup hardcore though(just love meeting people)a girl had the gut to tell me that "aint she special to me huh" well i guess the attraction model has gotten her so confident that she believes its part of the relation and it required. there are level as always stated never keep or delay attraction phase.

    now you have wiped a clean slate sort of even though the previous issues pertain you will handle them later.good frame do not stop pushing ahead...

  6. #106
    Rod27 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Ok so let's start from scratch.......what's your structure for attraction? Let me clarify on making her jealous......I don't mind if she sees me or hears about me being out and about with a woman FROM SOMEONE ELSE. But I can't be the one telling her.

  7. #107
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Hmm


    "Hey carol, i thought quickly about what you said and considered a few options.
    you enabled the side of me that doesn't like to force women into doing what they may not.i think i acted this way for different reasons.currently a friend of mine wants me join him and a group of his friends for an activity.he recommended me to one of his female friends ..just a 23 year old braziilian.
    he does not know much but he said he mentioned me in one of his convos and now she doesn't mind a meetup.few days ago he hinted the girl keeps asking about when the date is coming on.. and that reminded me of you.i would have gone into details but then..i take back the mojo comments plus all the friendly text i sent you.i have a clear..noticed something about you."

    In the course of attracting her you never stated you wanted to date another woman.remember that nurse told you she was finding herself.when a woman is finding herself she may be trying to sort out her feelings and don't be surprised she took those flowers.you need to meet her halfway.you have been missing in action for a bit sort of.this enables many things on loads of levels jealousy wont be one of them because you are not even stating you like the "23 yr old girl" here a nice friend who deosn't know much about your private life recommended you

    "he does not know much "
    you are not going about telling people your divorced and you need a woman.this guy thinks ur.. and just threw your name into a conversation.

    the date refers to the meetup with your friend and the girl then you.totally innocent

    Attraction struct according to your dynamic(some)
    Rebuilding and solidification of structures in relation etc.


    dhvs are a dangerous subject and if done improperly may lead to poor results.to me when you tell a girl about how much fun you had at a place saying people are really friendly especially the females you are are showing higher value.if you must use copy exactly as you see in the way it was written.get that out of the way and lets focus on something else. i don't think going out to sarge girls which you can its best give her a fair shot.you could just talk to girls innocently though

    lastly if someone breaks the news your seeing someone in a way that implies you are really passionate about that girl it could break her take control of the process yourself by using a 'friendly' dhv...its more powerful.you may have done enough damage.no seeing of girls explicitly yet but you can talk to other girls innocently if you may..

  8. #108
    Rod27 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Today her mom came to the door to pick up the baby. Looks like I need to lay low.

  9. #109
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Be non reactive never ask of her.you can't say you wont see her but if she realizes this affect you she can stretch it for the long term.(think Sh1t Test)

    yur problem seems to be compounding currently she probably sees you as the guy who 'tried to ask her out' you need to capture her attention.

  10. #110
    Rod27 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    i think sending her mom means she sees me as pushing her.....to me it shows decreased trust or she thinks i wanted to talk to her or bring up another conversation which will bring bad memories or a possible argument or whatever worst case she thinks that she would rather not deal with. So it is easier to not see me. I am going to respect what she said about giving her space and letting her regain trust.

    We took a step back today....but i will be patient. No contact.


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