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Thread: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

  1. #51
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Hmm its good that she allowed herself to see you one morning.its a good sign.don't take this personal but i think this woman is feeling attraction for you and is giving you a few sh1ts tests. you seemed to have nailed them which is good but don't forget the part where you must never seek her opinion and the frames

    LMAO......ok hun, you are right <-- It looked like your were seeking approval or had bought into her frame of eating into your days then you cutting for her.A way to handle this is first of all recognize it as a Sh1t Test.Remember we talked about the part where you convey that if you don't spend time with your son some its not a big deal sort of.This will be key to bringing her in.

    On Jul 17, 2013, at 2:37 PM, Carol
    wrote:

    Yes your days are the same. So you are planning to

    cut your vacation short so I can see him?*
    <--This is where the sh1t test is pertinent it looked like she was trying to see whether you will get back at her for cutting through.sounds like someone may want her ex husband to cut thier vacation short on some level too, but its mostly the other.Don't go ahead and feature the the shortening vacation part in an exchange.

    Handling sons sh1t test final parts
    maintain a strong frame she is not really right for sending your son away for 13 days...take son when your time is over text her implying you decided to keep him for a week and if imply if she wants time back she comes and spend time with your son at your place either than that you're keeping him for a while.add smilie face emocon

    say you have been with son till duration of time ends on the day it ends
    ..I decided to keep him for a week woman if you want time you could come spend it with him here either way i may keep him for a while (add smilie face)

    two things may happen either she gets pissed calls or texts you back or be the bigger one so to speak and let go either way text back saying you were messing with her and that she can come back in 3 weeks.then the next line say you got vacation ahead so she can come for him that day.

    lol, well you can come back in 3 weeks..
    vacation ahead so come for him today.

    the goal is to covey your unaffected but won't take that.

    whenever she is on her vacation try not to contact her.at best don't unless she says something.


    Are you ok?....you capitalized HIM....I get that you are still emotional.....The divorce has been a good thing but you are still lashing out and trying to manipulate. *I dont feel a need to contact you so relax. *
    You sensed when something is wrong.you sought her approval.the divorce was not easy don't ask her again.you are both attracted but there are some things you must do.One element i can guarantee is attraction as the father figure in her son life thats HUGE.and we have not talked about the rest yet.but theres still work to be done on this.Don't call your son during vacation if you must call her and talk to her then ask of son see him for a bit talk to mum then hang up.

  2. #52
    Doctodd is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    He is only 2 so he can't talk on phone without her help.....plus it's moot cuz she already had her vacation. Mine starts Wednesday. I've been going to church and getting stronger spiritually....it's the same church she goes to, but I go earlier than she does so she doesn't know it yet. She will eventually find out....turns out i saw her divorce attorney there this morning. No problem.

  3. #53
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    It can be implemented anytime you have him as it was designed.it can be spun as a way to mess with her next time she shits tests you on your son.The points of the last line really is to not act as if its all about your son.the best way to do this is to not be overt about son relations.you must have spoken to her then

  4. #54
    Doctodd is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    The "LMAO....ok hun, you are right" comment was because I wasn't going to get sucked into defending myself about something she accused me of. Instead I just said ok. But I see how I could have said it better.

  5. #55
    Rod27 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    my son's birthday is early september.....going to take a leap and say "lets put aside our differences and make great memories for our son with both of us in the pictures". If she doesnt answer the door and i cant say it in person at wednesday morning exchange, will have to do it by phone.

    Why do you think she wont face me and continues to avoid me? Fear and pain on her part? She seems very defensive. FYI still no contact by any means....but i will initiate the above before Disney Cruise while also conveying that i am working on becoming a better Christian man even if we dont reconcile, and that i turned my back on her during the marriage and her needs and that was a mistake, but it's the past and lets work on the future. I will be raising our son in Christian faith like we/she always wanted.

  6. #56
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    my son's birthday is early september.....going to take a leap and say "lets put aside our differences and make great memories for our son with both of us in the pictures".
    This will barely work if not at all.infact she may frame it as go have fun with your kid then ill have mine or spilt the day know why?even if she feels like going this not the best time.play your cool. this may not be easy but you can't coil now.remember attraction first.you are on the right path

    If she doesnt answer the door and i cant say it in person at wednesday morning exchange, will have to do it by phone.

    if she answers your calls it a sign sort of even if its about kid.with time she will come see you.

    Why do you think she wont face me and continues to avoid me?
    We are going to get to that soon.it ties in with the attraction FINAL phase, before on going.
    Fear and pain on her part? She seems very defensive.
    If she felt that shes being through all that.once again don't bother or feature it yet.infact not at all.theres another way.

    FYI still no contact by any means....but i will initiate the above before Disney Cruise while also conveying that i am working on becoming a better Christian man even if we dont reconcile, and that i turned my back on her during the marriage and her needs and that was a mistake, but it's the past and lets work on the future.
    Tread cautiously this may hurt you more than you think.Don't tell her you are working on being a better Christain just be one and sure you may raise your child however but if you feature it in this way she may see it as a way to get back to her.In a nutshell why now.if you will do that just go ahead and do that do not feature it.you can't just put memories like that behind,there are no differences you may be thinking too hard.its normal.focus more on the task at hand.if you make it a big deal well it could become a big deal.

    What one other thing from here
    She likes you still.what i think you feel is high Tension.as said not coming out to see you often is normal.you remind her of the divorce.don't go telling her that, we don't want her thinking along that line caused by you again.it will fade soon.

    The only problem you have right now is why did that happen - in her mind.
    she may feel emotions towards you but..etc.

    Hey 'name of x wife here'
    I am on this morning(time of day) about to let out some deep revelations.it has come to my notice that you may have ... therefore i must tell you this.made some huge decisions for my life and almost everything.i took care of mediation because i knew you are a great mother, very nurturing and supportive.infact i had made the decision earlier on even before but then i just had to be sure you didn't mind urs.you come off as a strong woman..i had a clear..u may not go there on why the divorce happened because you may have won.it doesn't matter all i want is my kid to grow up well and we seem to share that passion.sort of like teammates working towards a common goal.
    you must take a journey with me

    to be honest its best not to take Disney cruise and focus more on your relationship with ex wife.How about you invite her over after you text her.think barbacue with son or you cooked something and you want her input /her opinion on it.tip: order chinese or something put it in the fridge and serve.the text is key it should help more with attraction phase.the learning curve is comprehensive and since we are a bit pressed for time and you have been in touch with this side of you remember handling Sh1t Test it won't be hard for her to associate that with you.its tied in your character.PEACE

  7. #57
    Doctodd is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Where are u from Hardrock? Curious where your English is from.

  8. #58
    Rod27 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Here is what I have been rehearsing if she answers the door cuz I want to be prepared....

    (heavy eye contact and body language, in deep calm voice) Good morning Carol.....I wanted to say face to face that I'm sorry I lost you. I made many mistakes during the marriage because I'm not perfect, but I take responsibility for them and am willing to work past them and be a better man. (heavy eye contact and MAYBE kiss on the forehead at exit)

    That's it...short and sweet. Do i mention anything about family to try and trigger a positive emotion in her?

    Baby will be in my arms sucking on some juice that I will bring to keep him calm. Will bring up baby's birthday party later in the week....hopefully building on this.

  9. #59
    Rod27 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Wow it went pretty well.....i added a couple words here and there such as at the end i said i was working to be a better Christian man. She was startled, actually shook her head in disbelief or whatever. But she was not as emotional as I had hoped....she was cool about it. She said thanks It meant alot, she wasnt expecting that, and also apologized for her mistakes. I told her we should have a joint birthday for our son which is in early September, but she said she wasn't there yet. Went to kiss on her forehead and she leaned her cheek instead.

    Text later was "the queen still looks pretty cute in the mornings". She said "thx U! have a safe and fun trip."

    I later validated what she said...."I heard and appreciate what you said. You had no fault...in your own way you were communicating your unhappiness, and I should have put my pride aside and been the man you needed."

  10. #60
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to alpha communicate with new exwife.

    Wow it went pretty well.....i added a couple words here and there such as at the end i said i was working to be a better Christian man. She was startled, actually shook her head in disbelief or whatever.
    That text was a bit emotionally charged.as said previously its best not to feature being a Christian man often.just go ahead and be if you may.

    I told her we should have a joint birthday for our son which is in early September, but she said she wasn't there yet. Went to kiss on her forehead and she leaned her cheek instead.

    Nice escalation there bet you miss kissing her forehead.it was a bit too soon...but then its ok.next time remember its a process.i know you are unaffected by her reply to that and understand it was a bit pressure.shes attracted.theres a lot to do.

    Text later was "the queen still looks pretty cute in the mornings". She said "thx U! have a safe and fun trip."
    She is really on about this trip this is a second subliminal ioi in that regard.you must love sweet talking her.attraction foremost..

    Where are u from Hardrock? Curious where your English is from.
    woah yur outta line man ...

    I later validated what she said...."I heard and appreciate what you said. You had no fault...in your own way you were communicating your unhappiness, and I should have put my pride aside and been the man you needed."
    Hmm you shouldn't have said this.she may be drawn a bit so it lessens the blow but then its like accepting you made a huge mistake which u kind of did but then...wil show one thing below.


    You have done extremely well and are on the right path.you can't look back now.even though you made a few mistakes overall it was good but some statements you made...remember with women little details count.

    if you haven't sent her via text the blueprint extraction message you must while you are away.copy and paste now if you can why?all our structures are built in that sort of and you must solidify your position.no half ass red hot attraction.its RED HOT ATTRACTION.i don't believe in broad strokes but nailing things that are pertinent to your dynamic.Whilst you are away there are some things you must do.in a nutshell you did well but copy and paste that text to create a fossil in her mind.theres more work ahead .get that text on her phone.its salvageable


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