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  1. #1
    testing123 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default i asked an ex coworker to hang out and she kind of just ran away and hid

    ====long story short
    i went to my ex-work place talk to some of the co-workers (this includes the girl), ate, before i left, i spoke to the girl asked what she was doing after work, she said nothing etc...i then said we should hang out sometime, in like a quick/subtle (i want to identify it as confident nervous) response she said she was going to the fair tomorrow (i kind of chuckled because i didn't necessarily say that we should hang out tomorrow)i then said it's alright we can hang out another time, then someone said something and out of nowhere she quickly retreated and literally hid for a good 2Min.

    i hung out for about a min. to see her again and try and get a reply, she was kind of being quick with her movements and i don't play games, i sure as hell wasn't going to chase her and ask again, so i just left.



    ====Background story
    i know she thinks i'm cute, she has a boyfriend but always seems unsatisfied. I think she is unsatisfied with her guy, for several reasons one most important being, her being really excited about her birthday and asking where to go and then i see her like a week after her birthday and i ask her how it went and she said "it sucked" (something like that)she was unsatisfied and i know she hung out with her boyfriend because what girl doesn't plus she was saying that she would.

    however on her birthday i gave a nifty note with a memorable moment we had. It was a work joke but i know she liked it.


    ====How I Lead Up To The Question
    one of the most important things i did i feel was after i had a few bites of my meal, i called her over "hey come talk to me" she asked "about what", i just said "i just wanna say hi" and she then had this giggly smile to her and said "oh, hi". she continued to try and work as her boss accused me of "poaching his talent". He overheard us talking about her getting a job where i work. He fucking killed it when i hung around for that min. after i asked her because he asked the same fucking shit.

    I was a little disappointed in myself because i felt i made it to obvious that i was hanging around for her but i quickly realized what i was doing and went about my way.




    ====MY QUESTIONS
    1.) What i want to know is that. Is her behaviour a good thing? or did i fuck things up.

    2.) what would be the next "right" move?
    i plan on asking her when i see her again a week or so from now how her trip to the fair went, ill joke around a little from what she gives me, then i start a conversation about it etc... then i plan on asking her something like "so you never answered my question, when we should hang out" but then again i feel that if i just let that go and wait like 1 or 2 more visits i can pull a "hey i just found this great spot etc... you should come with me"

    i dont know what the hell i am doing, SO what would you do?

  2. #2
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: i asked an ex coworker to hang out and she kind of just ran away and hi

    Never ask a girl to "Hang out"...

    It makes you look indecisive & unsure of yourself.
    Women are attracted to confident, Alpha men who have a plan & aren't afraid of taking charge.

    Also, when you do mention getting together, you have to make it sound fun. (Fun is the ultimate attraction switch!)


    "Hey, do you maybe wanna hang out sometime?" - WRONG.

    "Hey there spunky-pants, you totally have to check out xxxx place. I'm going this Sat at 7:28. Roll with me & we'll have a blast!" = THE RIGHT WAY


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  3. #3
    testing123 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: i asked an ex coworker to hang out and she kind of just ran away and hi

    so whats the assumption on her behaviour, was her reaction a good thing?

    i realized last night that i forgot the tone she used when she said she was going to the fair. It could have been an invite??

  4. #4
    testing123 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: i asked an ex coworker to hang out and she kind of just ran away and hi

    Quote Originally Posted by T-Mal View Post
    Never ask a girl to "Hang out"...

    It makes you look indecisive & unsure of yourself.
    Women are attracted to confident, Alpha men who have a plan & aren't afraid of taking charge.

    Also, when you do mention getting together, you have to make it sound fun. (Fun is the ultimate attraction switch!)


    "Hey, do you maybe wanna hang out sometime?" - WRONG.

    "Hey there spunky-pants, you totally have to check out xxxx place. I'm going this Sat at 7:28. Roll with me & we'll have a blast!" = THE RIGHT WAY
    fucking A - so its not too late for a round 2?

  5. #5
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: i asked an ex coworker to hang out and she kind of just ran away and hi

    Your interest in her is pretty much evident now. To her and possibly others. And beings that she has a bf, and she doesn't seem like she's mentally there yet to just go "hang out" with you, I think pushing may just literally push her away.

    First thing, you have to hide her from her inhibitions. I don't know who all knows each other, but you can't ask her to out in front of people that may go back to her bf.

    Assuming that no one would go back to him you still have to hide her from her inhibitions. Don't set something up like it's just for you two. That's a date. Something, it seems, she is trying to avoid. Set something up as a group setting. Hell even bring a date for yourself!! You have to hide it from her so she doesn't feel guilty about it. Give her plausibly deniability.

    Once you're out in the group then let things progress "naturally" (meaning run Indirect Game). Because she has a bf you have to give the impression that "things just happened." Going direct is very risky at this point. Direct Game will force her to admit that she is playing a part in the seduction which would in turn make her feel guilty. If it was indirect and things just happened then she'd likely feel guilty AFTER things happened.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  6. #6
    testing123 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: i asked an ex coworker to hang out and she kind of just ran away and hi

    Quote Originally Posted by BatMan View Post
    Your interest in her is pretty much evident now. To her and possibly others. And beings that she has a bf, and she doesn't seem like she's mentally there yet to just go "hang out" with you, I think pushing may just literally push her away.

    First thing, you have to hide her from her inhibitions. I don't know who all knows each other, but you can't ask her to out in front of people that may go back to her bf.

    Assuming that no one would go back to him you still have to hide her from her inhibitions. Don't set something up like it's just for you two. That's a date. Something, it seems, she is trying to avoid. Set something up as a group setting. Hell even bring a date for yourself!! You have to hide it from her so she doesn't feel guilty about it. Give her plausibly deniability.

    Once you're out in the group then let things progress "naturally" (meaning run Indirect Game). Because she has a bf you have to give the impression that "things just happened." Going direct is very risky at this point. Direct Game will force her to admit that she is playing a part in the seduction which would in turn make her feel guilty. If it was indirect and things just happened then she'd likely feel guilty AFTER things happened.


    So what do i do now. Do i go back to her jobsite 4 days later, a week later etc (i don't have her number or anything) and when i do, how do i play it off, just wing it or should i have a plan? (what should the plan be?)

  7. #7
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    Default Re: i asked an ex coworker to hang out and she kind of just ran away and hi

    Well I'm not sure when you should. Possibly a week or two. But when you do you have to say or do something that shows she is not on your target list. Such as saying that you are taking a girl out with some of your friends and would like her to come. You should disqualify yourself. It'll be tricky since you have already shown interest. But if enough time has gone by then it shouldn't be too strange to think that you would have moved on from her.

    But keep in mind that she should "earn" that invite from you. Don't just throw it out there. Wait until you're in good convo before you suggest anything.

    In summary there are two things:

    - Find a way to disqualify yourself in order to hide her from her inhibitions

    - Have her "earn" the invite from you by saving it only after some good convo and she "reminds you" that she's a fun girl to be around.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."


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