Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Results 1 to 9 of 9
Like Tree2Likes
  • 1 Post By BatMan
  • 1 Post By theBOB

Thread: Girls in group: handing out business cards?

  1. #1
    lucifer7 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 473, Level: 9
    Level completed: 46%, Points required for next Level: 27
    Overall activity: 31.6%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    130
    Points
    473
    Level
    9
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    28

    Default Girls in group: handing out business cards?

    There's always been much talking about girls in group and how to approach them.
    The whole "mystery method" is built around groups.

    THE ISSUE WITH GROUPS
    But I feel that no matter what you're always going to have a harder time with a girl in a group.
    And it's not just about the cockblocker thing.
    Much more so if it's a mixed group, but even in a group of just chicks the girl is likely to feel some "peer pressure" to say yes, to exchange phone number and to possibly being questioned by the friends on how it went etc. etc.
    And in case she's got a BF the group pressure is that much higher

    THE BUSINESS CARD FIX
    So I was thinking, rather than asking for phone number, facebook, dates and anything, couldn't it be a possible way to skirt the social pressure thing entirely by making your opening, state your interest, possibly talk/joke a bit and then... Handing out . That way she doesn't have to stand the social pressure of "saying yes" to you and feeling looked down by her friends for giving away phone numbers to complete strangers because she can do so alone at home, away from nosy bystanders .

    And... You'll save time, money and energies in (not) making the first step



    What do you think?

  2. #2
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
    Points: 31,552, Level: 100
    Level completed: 0%, Points required for next Level: 0
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social25000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Awards:
    Most PopularCommunity Award
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    2,151
    Points
    31,552
    Level
    100
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 12 Times in 12 Posts
    Rep Power
    1389

    Default Re: Girls in group: handing out business cards?

    It's an interesting concept, but I feel it falls a bit short. Beings that you approach with a business Mindset it will be tougher to transition into a natural convo later. It'll definitely be easier to get phone numbers, but the phone number isn't very important. It's what you do before you get it that's important. I'd rather have 2 or 3 solid phone numbers than 10 flaky numbers.

    Group theory works just fine. You see, if she has a bf and he's in the group it'll be fairly obvious. If not then just ask how they all know each other. If she has a bf at home then that's what bf destroyers are for.

    Trying to come in under the radar with the phone number so the friends don't find out is not something you have to deal with. If you run group theory properly then her friends will like you and practically tell her she better get your number. And they will speak highly of you when you separate. Why not take advantage of this? I mean, if you want to talk about peer pressure than that's the best kind.

    You should reach a point in the interaction where everyone knows you like each other and that's ok. I mean, at some point you have to at least let her know that you like her. Can't hide it from her forever.

    Your approach definitely has potential and as long as you fill in the gaps where it comes up short it'll make for an interesting play in field.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  3. #3
    theBOB's Avatar
    theBOB is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 324, Level: 6
    Level completed: 48%, Points required for next Level: 26
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    250 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    53
    Points
    324
    Level
    6
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
    Rep Power
    18

    Default Re: Girls in group: handing out business cards?

    Business cards are not great for pickup, but I have one trick that works well. As an opener that's not good, and as a "throw one out there- hope she calls" it's not great either. I'm a musician and I have cards, and even with super interested girls they rarely work. The key is handing them out to ONE girl discreetly and that your already in comfort with.

    I'll play it out (with a 9.5 who I ended up dating for 9months):

    After warm-opening (we had friend in common, although we met at a loud bar with a band) we talked all night, I showed pics of a recent trip, tons of Kino (even thumb wrestling) and all that. Text-book pickup so far. Her friends loved me but wanted to set me up with a DIFFERENT girl. again, I knew like 3 out of 8 girls (yes it was an 8-set). It wasn't a huge problem that I was obviously flirting with her and she was totally into me, I still thought there would be a problem if I did the obvious cell-out number exchange. To avoid the awkwardness when I said goodbye, I pulled her close in for a hug (her arms around my neck, mine around her waist. I slid a business card into her back pocket and said "I know how you feel, here's my card text me tonight". The fact that I picked up on her friend situation was a huge social dhv and the way I did it felt pro and had a huge confidence she would call me. Five minutes later on the ride home she lit up my phone and two meet-ups later was the f-close.

    THAT'S how you use business cards. Added bonus is the hand-on-butt necessity of sliding the card in the back pocket, big kino, kind of necessary, and really ices the cake.
    --theBOB--

  4. #4
    lucifer7 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 473, Level: 9
    Level completed: 46%, Points required for next Level: 27
    Overall activity: 31.6%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    130
    Points
    473
    Level
    9
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    28

    Default Re: Girls in group: handing out business cards?

    Quote Originally Posted by BatMan View Post
    It's an interesting concept, but I feel it falls a bit short. Beings that you approach with a business Mindset it will be tougher to transition into a natural convo later. It'll definitely be easier to get phone numbers, but the phone number isn't very important. It's what you do before you get it that's important. I'd rather have 2 or 3 solid phone numbers than 10 flaky numbers.

    Group theory works just fine. You see, if she has a bf and he's in the group it'll be fairly obvious. If not then just ask how they all know each other. If she has a bf at home then that's what bf destroyers are for.

    Trying to come in under the radar with the phone number so the friends don't find out is not something you have to deal with. If you run group theory properly then her friends will like you and practically tell her she better get your number. And they will speak highly of you when you separate. Why not take advantage of this? I mean, if you want to talk about peer pressure than that's the best kind.

    You should reach a point in the interaction where everyone knows you like each other and that's ok. I mean, at some point you have to at least let her know that you like her. Can't hide it from her forever.

    Your approach definitely has potential and as long as you fill in the gaps where it comes up short it'll make for an interesting play in field.

    Very true, there's a danger of coming off a bit cowardly.
    Showing up, saying hi giving the card and leaving is only guaranteed to have the card taken and have your name read out loud to "give a name to the creepy idiot who just came by"

    The point is, it shouldn't be used as an excuse not to man up and/or to make a good conversation/impression.

    Everything should go as normal, the card should only be used to overcome the possible jealous friend cockblocker and the possible shyness/peer pressure the girl would feel in giving out the contact details.

    Also it presents a possible upside: you can come off as very unneedy, the guy who doesn't even need to ask, like saying "I'm not even asking your number to call you, here I am, if you wanna have this great chance give it a try, if not, nice meeting you".


    @TheBob, seems an interesting point of view, just started reading, looking forward to get back to that

  5. #5
    lucifer7 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 473, Level: 9
    Level completed: 46%, Points required for next Level: 27
    Overall activity: 31.6%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    130
    Points
    473
    Level
    9
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    28

    Default Re: Girls in group: handing out business cards?

    Quote Originally Posted by theBOB View Post
    Business cards are not great for pickup, but I have one trick that works well. As an opener that's not good, and as a "throw one out there- hope she calls" it's not great either. I'm a musician and I have cards, and even with super interested girls they rarely work. The key is handing them out to ONE girl discreetly and that your already in comfort with.

    I'll play it out (with a 9.5 who I ended up dating for 9months):

    After warm-opening (we had friend in common, although we met at a loud bar with a band) we talked all night, I showed pics of a recent trip, tons of Kino (even thumb wrestling) and all that. Text-book pickup so far. Her friends loved me but wanted to set me up with a DIFFERENT girl. again, I knew like 3 out of 8 girls (yes it was an 8-set). It wasn't a huge problem that I was obviously flirting with her and she was totally into me, I still thought there would be a problem if I did the obvious cell-out number exchange. To avoid the awkwardness when I said goodbye, I pulled her close in for a hug (her arms around my neck, mine around her waist. I slid a business card into her back pocket and said "I know how you feel, here's my card text me tonight". The fact that I picked up on her friend situation was a huge social dhv and the way I did it felt pro and had a huge confidence she would call me. Five minutes later on the ride home she lit up my phone and two meet-ups later was the f-close.

    THAT'S how you use business cards. Added bonus is the hand-on-butt necessity of sliding the card in the back pocket, big kino, kind of necessary, and really ices the cake.
    No, no way as an opener .

    Liked your story, you took a risk in exchanging contacts only at the end .

    The way I imagine can be a bit like your situation but not across a whole night (even though it might even be).
    As much as you won't get a date and a lay from each girl you meet, you won't get a girl texting you back from a business card either, but it might enhance your chances in several occasions.

    And if she does contact you back, that has already upped your value: she contacted you first.

  6. #6
    Suave Kino's Avatar
    Suave Kino is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 12,701, Level: 73
    Level completed: 63%, Points required for next Level: 149
    Overall activity: 80.0%
    Achievements:
    Social10000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Albuquerque, NM
    Posts
    612
    Points
    12,701
    Level
    73
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
    Rep Power
    542

    Default Re: Girls in group: handing out business cards?

    Ok, I see where you are going with this and I hate it. You can easily and quickly, identify who is in the group, build social value within the group, and then Isolate her so at the very least she will turn her back to the group and engage you one on one. At this point a number exchange, kiss, and filthy dirty sex talk is all fair game. You just need to work on your skills.

  7. #7
    lucifer7 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 473, Level: 9
    Level completed: 46%, Points required for next Level: 27
    Overall activity: 31.6%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    130
    Points
    473
    Level
    9
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    28

    Default Re: Girls in group: handing out business cards?

    Quote Originally Posted by Suave Kino View Post
    Ok, I see where you are going with this and I hate it. You can easily and quickly, identify who is in the group, build social value within the group, and then Isolate her so at the very least she will turn her back to the group and engage you one on one. At this point a number exchange, kiss, and filthy dirty sex talk is all fair game. You just need to work on your skills.
    Fair enough when you're able to do that, but good luck doing that if it's day time and the girls are just waiting for their tram...

    Or if it's somewhere and the group is your friends rather than her friends and she feels scared of a group of guys, or if it's a queue to the ticket office for a lyrical opera etc. etc.

    Anyway, I still appreciate criticism as that's the best way too see the possible shortcomings

  8. #8
    theBOB's Avatar
    theBOB is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 324, Level: 6
    Level completed: 48%, Points required for next Level: 26
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    250 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    53
    Points
    324
    Level
    6
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
    Rep Power
    18

    Default Re: Girls in group: handing out business cards?

    I suppose I've used cards as kind of an Anchor or familiarization thing. I definitely remember giving them and making the "if you never see me again...." Joke to her friends before. If they're giving you stink about isolating, I felt since they had my info it was "keeping me honest" so to speak. They trust you alone with their friend if they can easily contact you. It happened once that the targets friend texted me to tell me the girl liked me (no shit were at a booth alone....).

    Another way they can help, but still never drop and walk.
    --theBOB--

  9. #9
    lucifer7 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 473, Level: 9
    Level completed: 46%, Points required for next Level: 27
    Overall activity: 31.6%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    130
    Points
    473
    Level
    9
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    28

    Default Re: Girls in group: handing out business cards?

    I was thinking that another possible use would be when for example the two of you are really in a hurry and/or have to move on the spot without time to take out the phone to exchange contacts -imagine her train has just come and you don't have to board it-.

    The best possible outcome would actually be telling her to wait for the next train while she talks to you and she complying... But it's not always possible and it's good to have a plan B.


Similar Threads

  1. How do I talk to a group of girls?
    By theSkap in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 3
    Last Thread: 01-08-2013, 04:13 AM
  2. How to approach girls in a group of guys and girls
    By astonaidan in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 0
    Last Thread: 01-01-2013, 09:06 AM
  3. group of guys 2 girls
    By benjam60-2012 in forum General Questions
    Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 11-01-2012, 03:28 AM
  4. How to approach a group of girls?
    By Philboss in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 5
    Last Thread: 09-26-2012, 09:57 AM
  5. business cards
    By Ba$$Hunter in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 0
    Last Thread: 07-20-2011, 07:33 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com