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Thread: In comfort, then freaks out!

  1. #11
    Swagman's Avatar
    Swagman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: In comfort, then freaks out!

    The fact that she is not fully over her ex is a sign that you have not built up enough rapport. If you have not built up enough rapport, her mind is going to trigger the defense mechanism that prevents her from going forward. Of course that will always remain there, but rapport makes it so that she's willing to go further and further with you. Just be careful that you don't build up too much and end up in the friend zone

    You are definitely right on the getting attached bit, at least not until you are her boyfriend. The moment you become attached is when you become outcome dependent, and when you become focused on the outcome you screw up your naturality AND your game. You gotta do whatever it takes to keep your head in the game. Just use this trick: when you leave her, she's going to do the same things the two of you have done with other people, just as she cuddled with you like she cuddled with her ex. You will do the same, she's doing it, everybody's doing it. It's a negative Mindset, but it does the trick in terms of eliminating outcome dependency.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  2. #12
    Jatzz is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: In comfort, then freaks out!

    LMAO ok the coin flip was amazing I give you that! LMAO I can not wait for me to use that!!!!!!!!!!!! but as far as your situation your going to have to turn her down when she asks for a favor you need to play hard to get I just got out of a relashinship and she still LOVED her ex and I tell you what I broke up with her because she still was after 2 weeks of having sex and kissing she still had feelings for him so I hung in there gave it 4 and she still did and I broke up with her and now she is with him! YOU need to make her pick you from the start! you need to play hard to get make her focus on you ONLY!!!! my mistake I should have broke up with her the day I planned on breaking up with her ( 2 weeks in) and maybe she would of tried coming after me and forgetting her ex!

  3. #13
    Asian_Watts is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: In comfort, then freaks out!

    These forums should be illegal haha! Swagman, that not getting attached idea is just brilliant! I will always use it now.
    Quick update:
    She plays the: 'I'm definitely getting too attached to you now :/' (by the way, the reason she says this is because I'm going to uni in 3 weeks, she doesn't want to get too attached to me... Apparently) in which again, I can't be the everyday person so I just say: 'Yeah I like you too but don't want to get attached. Maybe we should stop seeing eachother'

    It's a bluff.

    It's risky.

    It

    Pays off.

    She gives the 'Oh no! I didn't mean that! I want to see you while you're still here.'
    I then make her convince me to see her haha.
    She's telling me that Thursday night was amazing and she wants to relive it etc.

    Guys, I appreciate it. This is amazing.

  4. #14
    Mikalichov is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: In comfort, then freaks out!

    And that's when I have to say: booyah.
    Seduction is a martial art. Reading books and talking to experts is important, and helpful. But you won't progress unless you go out there and fight.

  5. #15
    Swagman's Avatar
    Swagman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: In comfort, then freaks out!

    Ahaha! Atta boy! Now you have the conversation in your control, which is the key to any interaction. When you have her on the defensive like you do now, it only gives you more and more power the more it rolls on. You can see that you are in a very powerful position due to the comments she gave you and how hard she is trying.

    Although you may be on a high right now, you need to get your head out of the clouds. Yea, things are looking great for you, but in a state like that right now you could easily screw everything up with a poorly thought decision. You need to constantly keep your head in reality, and you can't get comfortable until you have succeeded in what you want to do. I can't tell you how many times I had screwed it up because I got too confident and too happy, and I pulled a bad move to make it all blow up in my face. This is a crucial time that you can't afford to screw up because you started thinking with your heart or little head instead of your big head.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X


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