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  1. #1
    xrm9963 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Older man, younger women

    I am almost 50 yo, recently divorced. I am physically fit, average+ looking ( I look younger than my age).
    Since my divorce I have dated/slept with a few women around my age or maybe 5-6 years younger (all around their mid 40's or up) and there were two main drawbacks in it:
    1 - they were all emotionally messed up because of bad experiences and/or bad divorces.
    2 - they were all physically messed up because of several births (saggy bellies, loose vaginas and falling tits), they were all too "soft" and out of shape.
    I would like to have the tools and skills to approach and date YOUNGER women, in their late 20's or early 30's, but i find myself hittting the same walls over and over:
    How do I approach a MUCH younger woman, without appearing creepy, how do I make myself interesting, intreguing and attarctive enough to have them disregard the age differences?

  2. #2
    RockNRollOutlaw is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Older man, younger women

    HI xrm9963. I'm an aspiring PUA like yourself so it's hard to give advice but I did notice you mentioned in your reply about not wanting to look creepy and age difference. You need to start looking at your inner game and forget this nonsense about being perceived as looking creepy and age differences. Don't care about what other people think, age is just a number, it's how you feel inside and more importantly how you act that is the main thing. Be confident, relaxed and enjoy yourself.

  3. #3
    Mikalichov is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Older man, younger women

    Ok, I'm not as far as you, but having hit on 10 years younger girls a couple of times, here is what I got

    First, no, it's not creepy. It's creepy if you think it's creepy. Women care about confidence, status, self esteem, experience with women and all that. And that's actually what age gives you. You're actually more attractive to her than a man her age

    And second, don't ever feel ashamed of your age, that's what makes it creepy. A 50yo trying to act and dress like a 25yo to hit on girls is creepy. A 50yo acting like a 25yo and hitting on girls, acnowledging that she is 25yo, is... a man, simply.

    Accept the difference, and embrace it. If she were looking for what another 25yo could give her, she would be with a 25yo. Think about what you can give her. You know more places to go, know more stuff, like salsa or whatever, your conversation is probably more interesting, and all that.

    As for the approach... If I hit on a girl 10 years younger than me, I will brace myself for really huge bitch shields. So I would totally ignore them, and be at my best, until they come fighting for my attention. And when I'm hitting on them, be clear about it.

    I actually know a 50yo guy who is kind of succesful with younger woman, and he also goes very direct very fast. Your age is an instant disqualification (they will tend more to think you are not actually hitting on them), so you will need to make it clear that yeah, you actually are.
    Seduction is a martial art. Reading books and talking to experts is important, and helpful. But you won't progress unless you go out there and fight.

  4. #4
    RockNRollOutlaw is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Older man, younger women

    Quote Originally Posted by Mikalichov View Post
    A 50yo trying to act and dress like a 25yo to hit on girls is creepy.
    I whole-heartedly agree. I've seen too many men having mid-life crises and trying to act and look younger. It is painful to watch.

    Accept the difference, and embrace it. If she were looking for what another 25yo could give her, she would be with a 25yo. Think about what you can give her. You know more places to go, know more stuff, like salsa or whatever, your conversation is probably more interesting, and all that.
    Exactly. Don't compete against any other guy. Be yourself and play up your strengths.

  5. #5
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    skicat is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Older man, younger women

    I'm 53 and gaming a 25yr old now. They're out there, by the hundreds you just have to keep looking. Stay in the gym and keep yourself up in everyway you can. Dress for the venue you're attending but do it in a mature way. I would really like to know...why is it that women hit 40, cut their hair the ears and get fat?

  6. #6
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    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Older man, younger women

    Honestly. Don't be ashamed of your age and the girls you want to date. Just think of Ross Jeffrey( even though I never saw his infield video). He seems like he knows what he's talking about
    You lose some you win some, learn from your mistakes and get better!

  7. #7
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    Suave Kino is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Older man, younger women

    Quote Originally Posted by xrm9963 View Post
    I am almost 50 yo, recently divorced. I am physically fit, average+ looking ( I look younger than my age).
    Since my divorce I have dated/slept with a few women around my age or maybe 5-6 years younger (all around their mid 40's or up) and there were two main drawbacks in it:
    1 - they were all emotionally messed up because of bad experiences and/or bad divorces.
    2 - they were all physically messed up because of several births (saggy bellies, loose vaginas and falling tits), they were all too "soft" and out of shape.
    I would like to have the tools and skills to approach and date YOUNGER women, in their late 20's or early 30's, but i find myself hittting the same walls over and over:
    How do I approach a MUCH younger woman, without appearing creepy, how do I make myself interesting, intreguing and attarctive enough to have them disregard the age differences?
    I'm 38 and counting the last few girls I dated they were, 28, 28, 22, 25, 22, and 22. My point its that's an average of 13.5 years, not to mention the girls I turn down.

    I don't act any age, I look good and my game is tight. I project self confidence and my conversation is brings them up to my level not me down to theirs. Good luck

  8. #8
    xrm9963 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Older man, younger women

    Thanks for the replyes.
    I had bee looking for Adam Gilad's products ( he has a new one about dating younger women), just to shed some light on the approaching issue, because THAT seems to be the hardest part for me, how to approach and create the initial connection, considering the age gap.
    Would you know a GOOD product, or maybe a "tool-set" to initiate connection or raport with a younger woman?

  9. #9
    xrm9963 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Older man, younger women

    Quote Originally Posted by skicat View Post
    I would really like to know...why is it that women hit 40, cut their hair the ears and get fat?
    I think it comes from frustration.
    think of it: she is 40, she probably has been hurt in a previous relationship so she is insecure, she is surrounded by younger women that get more attention than her etc.
    Add to it the first signs of aging (periods are not as regular as they used to be, her hormonal cycles gets messed up, maybe she already experience some sort of menapause) and you get a messed-up person.
    So she gets intimidated, her insecurities grow, she feels like she is in no position to compete, so she thinks "what the hell", cuts her hair, neglect her body, gets fat etc.
    And then men like us ACTUALLY stop looking at her...
    Its a viscious circle

  10. #10
    RockNRollOutlaw is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Older man, younger women

    Quote Originally Posted by xrm9963 View Post
    I think it comes from frustration.
    think of it: she is 40, she probably has been hurt in a previous relationship so she is insecure, she is surrounded by younger women that get more attention than her etc.
    Add to it the first signs of aging (periods are not as regular as they used to be, her hormonal cycles gets messed up, maybe she already experience some sort of menapause) and you get a messed-up person.
    So she gets intimidated, her insecurities grow, she feels like she is in no position to compete, so she thinks "what the hell", cuts her hair, neglect her body, gets fat etc.
    And then men like us ACTUALLY stop looking at her...
    Its a viscious circle
    The place where I work is full of mature married woman with kids. Thankfully in my team there are a few cool guys which keeps me sane but sometimes these woman have conversations which I find interesting and join in on occassion. One of these conversations occurred the other day when one of the woman was talking about the life. She mentioned that after she had her first kid, she had to give up on her career, settle down, grow up, be responsible and that sort of thing. I guess that the mothering instinct kicks in, it isn't about her any more and she has less time to do what she wants. That's fine if a woman is in a stable relationship but if she becomes single, it is harder for her to get into dating, focusing on new relationships etc. On top of that, I expect it becomes much harder when a woman becomes older with what you say. I don't know much of that is true but just an observation from that conversation and others I've heard from woman.


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