I apologize in advance if my question has been answered by others before.
Hi guys, Noctis just counseled me that I should stay away from indoor malls and day game and just work on night game in places like bars and clubs.
So, last weekend I explored the nightlife in my city for the first time. In the downtown area there is bar after bar and club after club. I went from venue to venue, spending in each, all over 5 hours.
Bars: (crowds come in earlier) 80% guys, 20% girls
Clubs (open later at night) 80% girls 20% guys. I observed that the girls who dance are not interested in talking. They just to move on the dance floor, which is 80% women, and they're just in their own little world, dancing with their girlfriends in little groups, not too interested in picking up men. Then there are girls along the bar sides and perhaps they are open to convo.
The girls in these places are generally 21 yo
I believe you could have a PUA who 70 or 80 or 90 years old but is so good in his game that the21 year olds would love to be with him.' So age is not the critical factor, as long as you have game. Game is the essential issue
So when I hear advice to do night game in bars and clubs, its I don't see how it can work. My big problem is that I am a 45 y.o. beta, with zero game, self esteem, confidence, social skills, and am awkward and can't even talk to guys less talk to girls.
When you have this completely inept 45 yo AFC going up to 21 year olds in a bar or club for convo, isn't it socially inappropriate in everyone's eyes? Doesn't it just scream creepy to have a 25 year age gap? Aren't the HB's definitely going to treat him differently than they treat those in their same age group?
I've heard instructors say that the age question is bullsh1t, but I don't agree because while alpha old guys do fine, beta old guys find HB's treat older men (especially those without game) differently than they treat their 21 year old peers. They just do. They treat them harshly, like they shouldn't even exist or be present in the room. There's no playfulness or openness or oh lets meet this guy he's new maybe he's fun. No its a prejudgment - too old, get away.
The night I went out recently, the girls wouldn't even make eye contact with me when I approached. And Two of them I approached, and as soon as they spotted me coming to them for convo, they just turned and walked away. It's like they have no time for middle aged men. Not even time for a hello.
So I don't know what I'm supposed to do with the advice to go to clubs and bars when they're all 21 year olds. If the goal is to get a #close, kclose, or more can those things really happen when they won't spend one second breathing the same air as you.
A 45 y.o. PUA with alpha game could do fine there. The girls would see he was projecting alpha and would talk to him. Girls will respond to alpha no matter the age, I think.
But when a beta is projecting beta, and screaming neediness outcome-dependence and aa and rejection anxiety and despiration, and low social skills and awkwardness and nice guy, its a different experience. The girls pick up on what you project. The Beta's age and state becomes an important factor.
Bottom line in bars and clubs I just feel like the creepy guy approaching young girls. I don'rt see other middle aged men out.
My ultimate goal is to do lots of approaches and try to get numbers, and I need some sort of venue for that, but when you're ignored and not given the time of day because they think your presence is creepy and socially unacceptable, then you don't get many chances to practice convo skills or anything other than rejection.
Despite all this should I still continue to go to the bars and clubs and just let whatever happens happens and I guess just collect lots of instant rejections from 21 yo? Without the option of really build skills like convo, teasing, kino, escalation, closing, etc.
How can a 45 yo AFC successfully learn his PUA skills during night game at bars and clubs? Maybe I don't have the right perspective? Any input to help me get the right perspective would be helpful.