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  • 8 Post By Vere
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Thread: The Quick And Dirty Guide To Manufacturing Confidence

  1. #1
    Vere is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default The Quick And Dirty Guide To Manufacturing Confidence

    Hey guys I have some good news for you regarding confidence.
    It may be shocking to you, or perhaps it's obvious.

    CONFIDENCE DOESN'T REALLY EXIST.

    Well...not as most people understand it anyway.It is nothing but a feeling that you have the right focus, and the perceptions that others will have of you when they see you behaving with that focus.

    In fact, I believe that telling a man ' just be confident' is absurd. Confidence itself is an illusion! Telling someone to be confident presupposes that they are not confident, and the words alone have a weakening effect on their state.

    In addition, telling someone to "be confident" is interpreted as "instantly change your beliefs", which is nearly impossible.

    Our beliefs change over time as a result as a result of Our Actions And Social Feedback.

    New beliefs aren't even that crucial in the short term. You don't have to have perfect beliefs to make a few changes in your focus or behavior and start and start getting better feedback (results) from women.

    I'd like to propose a new definition of confidence. I'd like you to stop thinking of confidence as being certain of success; think of it as the ACTION OF GIVING WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING THE ENTIRETY OF YOUR EFFORT.

    When we see what we believe is confidence, we aren't actually seeing a person's thoughts of the future, or of success. We are seeing the outer result of their focus.

    Think about a recent post-game interview with a star athlete. when he or she was asked, "Did you know you will make that shot? what were your thoughts going into the game? were you worried? Did you get upset after you made that mistake? How confident were you going into this crucial game?"

    WHAT DOES EVERY SINGLE ATHLETE SAY?

    "I wasn't really thinking about the other team, or how many points I got. I just knew that if I worked hard, and did what I had to do, we'd come out with the win. I wasn't concerned with the final result at that point-I just focused on my game, and in the back of my mind, hoped for the best"

    I just focused on my game.

    THAT IS THE REAL CONFIDENCE.

    Now with this in mind, knowing that confidence does not really exist, Imagine what we can do on task that require confidence. WE WILL BE UNSTOPPABLE IN THE FIELD!!!so gentlemen, lets apply this to our game and never again fear the unknown

    I hope this helps a lot of people that has confidence as their sticking point when approaching girls...Cheers fellas
    Whether you think you can or you can't either way, you are right-To believe in the heroic makes heroes

  2. #2
    Rexxx is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: The Quick And Dirty Guide To Manufacturing Confidence

    Great post man,I never saw confidence in this perspective. Thanks for sharing

  3. #3
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    Default Re: The Quick And Dirty Guide To Manufacturing Confidence

    Great Post and Interesting perspective on Confidence. Thanks for posting!

  4. #4
    K man is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: The Quick And Dirty Guide To Manufacturing Confidence

    Wow........dude what a dope confidence. Thats a great post again, where did you get it?

  5. #5
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    Default Re: The Quick And Dirty Guide To Manufacturing Confidence

    Love this post - it's so true. To take it a step further, don't even focus on "game". Don't even think about it. When you talk to a girl, just DO it. If you make mistakes, think about them afterwards and correct for the next time.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: The Quick And Dirty Guide To Manufacturing Confidence

    I agree with aforementioned explanation of our take on the word "confidence". It has become rather cliche in our society and just telling a guy "be confident" or society telling us "Women love confidence" sounds dumb since confidence in and of itself holds no substance. However this concept of "manufactured confidence" makes sense and actually has application unlike "confidence" which has zero application. It's like trying to mix oil and water by saying "have fun and be confident" because if you are having an off night, rough night, or not enough targets to work on you will not have fun which only lowers your confidence not increases it. Like what point is there to be confident if you are having a bad night?

    However manufacturing your own confidence will give you the right frame from the get go (having fun before the targets arrive or before you start approaching). We think far too ahead and I catch myself thinking (once the girls get here then I'll start having fun) and while this method works you need to bring the fun to survive in Set with an HB! Because regardless if it is a good turn out or a bad one you are going down with a bang and even if it sucks you know it's not you it is just an off night and not enough game to run or your game is not on point that night. I will be using this concept in field this Summer and will let you know how it goes.

    It's like when am I the most confident?
    1. After a couple drinks (Night Game only)
    2. Do 2-3 warm up Sets on lowball chicks 6-7's (No need for warm ups in Daygame)
    3. Looking my best (helps if you work out and good fashion sense)
    4. Be social with others first (social proofing and increasing my value)
    5. Get IOI's before the open (warm approaches)

    These are the best things for me to follow in terms of a daily or nightly sarging layout. Since I never start off on a HB9 at Night but I will open one off the bat during the day. Daygame is different since I don't need liquid confidence to be confident in Set. I love DayGame for this reason but it is sometimes harder to open for this reason and makes aa stronger. You will get blown out more frequently during day game if you are not confident since there is a lot more social pressure to not come off creepy. This is why a Bar Pull is expected but a Gym pull is going to take shear will!
    When you let go of your feelings you can really then embrace your surroundings
    Love is a game that's why I don't worry about it anymore. When you let go of your feelings you find your meaning.
    -Capn_Jack

  7. #7
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    Default Re: The Quick And Dirty Guide To Manufacturing Confidence

    I can't say that I agree with any of these perspectives.

    Confidence in the english language is defined as "the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; a firm trust".

    A synonym of confidence is conviction; a firmly held belief or opinion.

    A synonym of conviction is belief; trust, faith, or confidence in someone or something.

    So what more is self-condifidence as it applies to game, than a firmly held degree of trust in one's own worth and capability?

    In addition, telling someone to "be confident" is interpreted as "instantly change your beliefs", which is nearly impossible.
    I disagree.

    Our beliefs change over time as a result as a result of Our Actions And Social Feedback.
    I agree, action and social feedback are key. However I've personally experienced instant and radical change in my belief systems and have impacted instant change in friend's & clients belief systems.

    There are no shortcuts. Confidence is cultivated, not manufactured. Of course this is one just one man's perspective


    Good thread Verve!

  8. #8
    Naughty Napoleon's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Quick And Dirty Guide To Manufacturing Confidence

    If I am not wrong, this is quoted from Attraction Code.

    Good post!

    I remember as the time I am a basketball player, my coach telling me this:

    'Forget everything you heard about confidence.

    From my experience, you will have confidence when you have a solid process that will lead you to your goal. And you totally know how to go though that process.'

    I still remember that quote by my coach and always inspire me to find a solid process for everything I do..include pickup & seduction.


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