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  • 2 Post By T-Mal
  • 4 Post By dave_xxx

Thread: What should I do with her?

  1. #1
    emanus is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default What should I do with her?

    Hi

    Met a girl at the bar yesterday and we were talking for a bit. We happened to have a common interest that we're both somewhat passionate about (cooking) So I got her number and told her we should totally see each other again. She had no problem giving me her number or telling me where she lived. But afterwards I realized I never really ioi'd her. Just touched her every now and then but never worked for a kiss or anything like that, didn't try to build any attraction whatsoever, at least not consciously.

    When I see her again should I just directly let her know that i'm into her in a sexual way so she knows what i'm up to? Cause i'm not really sure what she thinks..

    Haven't texted her yet, thought I should wait a day or something. Think i'm gonna text something like "hey, I wanna see you, maybe cook something. yes? no? maybe? let me know"

    what do you guys think?

  2. #2
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: What should I do with her?

    Quote Originally Posted by emanus View Post
    Think i'm gonna text something like "hey, I wanna see you, maybe cook something. yes? no? maybe? let me know"
    Don't send that text...
    Read that one for yourself.

    What sort of message does it convey?
    Confidence? Bold? Decisive & having a plan? No.

    Girls hate that wishy-washy, timid approach.

    THAT text is basically saying, "I don't want to inconvenience you, and I'm sorry if I did... because I'm not sure if I'm cool enough to be with you... but maybe if you're feeling sorry for me, you'll have pitty & maybe give me a chance? That is, if you want... but if not, that's OK too."


    You need to flirt! Get her having fun & looking forward to hearing from you & hanging out with you.
    Then, get a plan together & tell her what it is.


    I have several of examples of HOW to set the date in my "Texting do's & don'ts" thread.


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  3. #3
    dave_xxx's Avatar
    dave_xxx is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: What should I do with her?

    T-Mal gave you great advice that you need to flirt more and guys need to take that advice.

    Flirt,flirt,flirt and flirt some more. Did I mention you should flirt?

    Text her this:

    "Hey, on the news they said there was bout of food poisoning at a local restaurant and some crazy but sexy female cook was to blame for that. I immediately thought it was you. I was going to let you cook for me but after that news I am thinking twice about that now "

  4. #4
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    Default Re: What should I do with her?

    Genius!!
    Simply brilliant work there my friend!


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  5. #5
    emanus is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What should I do with her?

    Thanks guys

    Did what you said and last thing I did I asked her out and the respons I just got was "Haha, wednesday 19.37? Sorry, i'm busy "

    What should my response be? First thought was "ok, 19.24 then"

  6. #6
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: What should I do with her?

    It seems like you have to raise your value. Cooking could be something that you use to raise your value rather than being a simple common interest. If you truly are a good cook then ignore her cooking talents and make her want to try your cooking by tempting her with photos or how great a chef you are 'I always use fresh herbs blah blah blah'. Lead her and make her chase you. Right now she's saying she is busy without offering a substitute date. She's not showing much interest. So you need to build more attraction and value so she really wants to meet up. By responding '19.24 then' you are just continuing to let her lead the frame and focussing too much on getting acceptance for a date rather than building attraction. Forget about asking her out for a while and get her emotionally charged.

    Cooking has some opportunities for emotions: 'Do you find it sexy when a man cooks?'. Trying to tee up a cooking date can be successful however is generally a lot of work (unless she is offering!) and not essential. The main thing is if you can get her out again and into a great conversation. I personally don't ever really directly say I want someone sexually unless we are in full cyber sex mode and the gates are already open. But indirectly you can sexually escalate to a fair degree in many different ways. Indirectly might be something like 'I liked your dress at the bar the other night...very sexy' or even just sending her a kiss emoticon. As others said - flirtation.

    There are no maybe's - you have to have the attitude you are successful and are going to attract lots of women. Exude that with 100% conviction and fun confident flirtation and she will hopefully not want to miss out.


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