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  • 1 Post By whitedragon

Thread: How to ask girl out after a one week freeze-out?

  1. #1
    freestylpolaris is offline PUA in Training
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    Default How to ask girl out after a one week freeze-out?

    First date, girl stays the night. Movies, great conversations, tons of Kino. She actually ends up sleeping in my bed with me (no sex though). Next day she texts me first apologizing for teasing me to which I acted unaffected. Later that night she asks me to stay the night, I couldn't that night.

    3 weeks pass, less and less talking. Got to the point where I asked her out 4 days ago and didn't even get a reply (among other messages in the past). Have been Freezing Her Out these past days with the exception of snap chat (to which she actually did reply to). Plan on freezing her out until Thursday then asking her out for drinks and seeing what happens. So just a few questions:

    Should I wait until the day off to ask her out for drinks or plan it a day before so I don't get any excuses the day of?

    If she tries to contact me should I continue freezing her out until the day of (or day before) or just reply back with a real convo or douchey one-liners?

    Thanks!

  2. #2
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to ask girl out after a one week freeze-out?

    I'm not sure why you needed to freeze her out. You should have slept with her when she stayed over. All that would have taken is the right kind of Kino Escalation where you get her hot and wet enough she won't resist. Sometimes you need to be aggressive and push through last minute resistence. In most cases if a girl stays over at your house she is saying yes to sex. By not taking that opportunity she maybe unsure about you, hence the 'apology' about teasing you or worse has now lost complete interest in you. The momentum has been lost. You probably need to re-build attraction.

    When she asked you out the next night and you were busy, you should have made an alternative arrangement as soon as you could to strike while she is hot.

    Since then she could have met any number of guys, might have been through her period and is moody or simply lost attraction to you because you went from almost everything to nothing.

    Forget about Freezing Her Out anymore, if there is no need to, and there's never any reason for douchey one liners - aim to build attraction and meet up again.

  3. #3
    freestylpolaris is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to ask girl out after a one week freeze-out?

    Great advice. I agree. She even commented to her friend she thought I was attractive so the sex probably could have happened; to be honest by the time we got to my bed it was 6 in the morning and I was barely awake. I escalated things after that but it was too late; she even commented how crazy it was that she stayed the night at a guy's and didn't do much.

    I did try to re-schedule immediately. She was busy at that point, and been trying to re-schedule since; it probably looks desperate. That's why I am Freezing Her Out, I have been trying and trying to see her and at this point what is talking to her going to achieve if she won't come out? I feel like she needs to come to me. If I talk to her what the hell am I going to say? Just ruin more conversations we could be having in person?

  4. #4
    freestylpolaris is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to ask girl out after a one week freeze-out?

    She's online. I messaged her. Conversation going good so far. Thank you so much about the freezing out tip. It was driving me nuts wondering if she was talking to other guys or meeting other guys while I'm sitting here forcing myself not to talk to her.

  5. #5
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to ask girl out after a one week freeze-out?

    Quote Originally Posted by freestylpolaris View Post
    .
    and been trying to re-schedule since; it probably looks desperate. That's why I am Freezing Her Out, I have been trying and trying to see her and at this point what is talking to her going to achieve if she won't come out? I feel like she needs to come to me. If I talk to her what the hell am I going to say? Just ruin more conversations we could be having in person?
    You don't need to Freeze Out IMO as that just draws out time even more, you need to rebuild a desire in her again for you. Forget about schedules and locking in a date because that is a very masculine clinical thing...focus on getting her excited about you emotionally by:
    - making her laugh
    - making her smile
    - making her respond
    - making her wet

    You just need to go back a few steps as the lights have changed from green to red. Rather than focussing on actually meeting up for the time being, focus on the above and she will hopefully naturally open up and maybe even suggest meeting up herself.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: How to ask girl out after a one week freeze-out?

    I agree with dragon here. This is one case where you have to strike the iron while it is hot.

    A lot of new guys make the mistake of over-using freeze outs for the fear of looking needy. NEVER Freeze Out when a girl is attracted to you. It kills the momentum, drags out time, and makes her wonder if you are interested.

    As for douchey one-liners? Are you a douche? If not don't use em, if it is not congruent to who you are. It's a harsh lesson learned if you act like something you are not and turn the girl off, and then regret and say "aw fvck if only I had been real it wouldn't have happened."

    As for planning for a date. Don't plan for anything. Whenever you "plan" you are setting yourself up for expectations. You want to keep your expectations low. If anything, just casually throw it out there naturally whenever you want.

  7. #7
    freestylpolaris is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to ask girl out after a one week freeze-out?

    Yeah and I think that's what got me in this situation. I wasn't striking in the right way. I was "striking" but probably to her it just looked needy or desperate for another chance or for sex in general. Instead of "oh hey come over here for a movie" I should have just invited her out with a group and gone from there. Or for food/drinks, just not straight back over here.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: How to ask girl out after a one week freeze-out?

    Need to plan only a few hours in advance. You don't have enough attraction for her to commit to anything in the future with you. If you know where she'll be, bumping into her there is best. But if it's a weird location, her stalker alarm might go off.
    The Official Tinder Playbook--> http://conquerdatingapps.co m <--Stop swiping, start hooking up

  9. #9
    freestylpolaris is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to ask girl out after a one week freeze-out?

    I'm actually going to a bar she is at often with another girl tomorrow hopefully. I'm not planning on going there to run into her or anything (it would be funny though), it's just a good close bar to take a girl for a few drinks.


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