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Thread: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

  1. #21
    DirectIsBest's Avatar
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    Default Re: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

    Awesome! This really is the key to success in anything. Allot of times these PUA "techniques" just over complicate things and make guys over analyze situations. A few little tips here and there can help any guy with whatever he struggles with, but when you take it too far it hurts your game. When you just stop caring what people think and be yourself everything comes together. Keep it up!

  2. #22
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    Default Re: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

    Day 15: Insecurities

    First I would like to thank you all for the encouragement/support over this self enlightenment journey. It means a lot to me to have support from people who know what it feels like to try to break old habits and become more comfortable with oneself.

    This post isn't related to picking up a girl at all. It's something that happened today that really stuck out in my mind.

    A non physical altercation of sorts between a friend and I happened today at the dining hall. I handled it pretty smoothly and we are on good terms, it's the nature of the altercation that is hilarious/informative to me. I want to detail to you guys what happened and I want your opinions on it. To me it showed the insecurities in men when it comes to women's opinion.

    The Spark

    So I'm at the dining hall with my friends and it is pretty packed. We go there early so we had a good seat and still room left for 2-3 more people. A pretty good friend of mine and his girlfriend approach us and sits at the empty seats presuming that the seats were empty (which they were).

    Background on our relationship

    No this guy and I always joke around. We always positively embrace each other when we see one another and he always tells anyone around that he loves my chocolateness lol.

    The Smoke

    Me with my dry sense of humor sees him sitting down and looks at him and his girlfriend shake my head and go, "No you can't sit there"

    His girlfriend looks at me and say, "Oh someone's sitting here?" and gets ready to get up and put the chair back.

    I then intervene and with a huge smile say that I am joking. It's something I did yesterday and to almost all new faces when they sit next to me for the first time.

    So that happens and I don't dwell on it, I continue my conversation and my friend and his girlfriend go on eating then I get up to get a refill and this ensues...

    The Fire

    (This part all happens in his girlfriends vision, but not where she could hear).

    My friend approaches me as I am walking to the drink station and says, "Don't embarrass me in front of my girl"

    I thinking it was a joke laughs it off but he's as serious as (insert a funny simile here) and reinforces that he's not joking. He was legit mad that I made a joke to his girlfriend that she couldn't sit next to my friends and I.

    I realize he's serious and I don't back down, this is where I knew I shifted from my old self into a more socially savvy person.

    Instead of arguing back or just agreeing and apologizing I do NEITHER.
    He goes to shake my hand after reinforcing that he wasn't kidding and telling me to not embarrass him and as I shake his hand I pull him back towards my direction.

    The Extinguishing

    I pull him back and tell him to talk to me about why he's feeling this way. I calmly tell him that I was not trying to embarrass him and that it was a joke I do to lighten the mood. He goes into saying how his girlfriend is shy and that my joke made her feel unwelcomed all which was probably things he came up with as a defense mechanism.

    I don't apologize for my actions, I tell him in probably the most mellowed out tone ever that it's my personality to do that and my intentions weren't to make him or his girlfriend feel unwelcomed. I make sure he knows that's the type of person I am and I am not sorry for that but I don't express it in an confrontational way. He says it is cool or something along those lines and less angrily then before walks back to the table with his girlfriend.

    He shakes my hand again and about 30 minutes later texts me apologizing for overreacting.

    The key to this is, I didn't apologize for my actions.

    Past me would have backed down and apologized for my actions. I would have probably let it effect my Mindset and how I talk to people but now I don't. I accept the fact that by me being a more social person and saying things that I like, it won't always be received positively.

    What I Learned

    Guys get so insecure around women. He already had a girlfriend but he was so concerned with not being "embarrassed." I recognized this insecurity and I will make sure not to be that person. Something so little such as a little teasing joke made him transform and visibly upset. So many guys want to not be seen weak around women. The true strength is not in defending your ladies honor, but in not letting little things effect you. I understand why he was upset, and I can't help but just laugh at how much a little thing impacted his mood.

    So even though I didn't get any closer to being romantically involved with a women today, I feel like I learned a lot today from this situation. I realized that I don't like/need to argue with people. I don't let things get me down or effect my mindset. I use to get effected by any little shade or negativity thrown my way but not now.

    I genuinely am not even phased by negativity and I love it. Letting rejection or negativity phase you is a sign of weakness and girls don't like weak men.

    Comments on similar situations/How you've handled someone disagreeing with your personality are appreciated

    Unlike before, I am legit in the mood to meet/pick up some new women. Hopefully tomorrow brings a good story or two.

    - Othello
    Stop Thinking,Start Living!

  3. #23
    Shark1804 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

    This is truly inspiring! You, my mate, have inspired me to start fighting against my aa and my social insecurities ASAP!

    Will deliver some field reports whenever I get the chance

    Keep inspiring us Othello! (Off topic: I feel a strong urge to read Shakespeare now)

  4. #24
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    Default Re: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

    Day 16: Question. When to turn up the Heat?

    Sup playboys?

    I'm still doing pretty well. I am maintaining a strong core, the thought of reverting back to shy ways sickens me.

    The thing is I feel as though I am being too situational and not transitioning well enough.

    The thing is I have no problem talking the that girl behind me in line or making a funny comment to someone with loud headphones BUT I feel like I come off too friendly and I don't build attraction. I want to be number closing more to set up later meet ups.

    My question is : After a situational opener, how soon do you guys transition into flirting and attraction building? And how do you go about it?

    I feel as though I am coming off as more of a funny guy then a guy they want to cuddle with (keeping it PG for the kids out there).

    I was thinking of just going, "I like your (insert personality trait here)" and telling them I want to talk to them again soon then.

    I also want critiques/advice on Dining hall opening. I see the same 2-3 girls (separate from one another). Would pulling the "I see you everywhere" opener at their table do the trick?

    I'm trying not to over complicate things here I just want to fix these weaknesses in my game. I need tips on how to not be seen in such as platonic light. I probably need to be more flirty sooner. I guess what I'm asking for is Flirt Tips. That sounds strange but I recognized a long time ago that I don't do it nearly enough.

    Look forward to some helpful insight!

    Stay sexy,
    - Othello
    Stop Thinking,Start Living!

  5. #25
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    Default Re: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

    I know a guy who has Asperger's and he's very confrontational. He used to comment on how I would flirt with every single girl that walked into the student lounge and insist that I was dating a different girl every week. Obviously, girls would hear this.Instead of ignoring his comments and bashing him, I simply told him that I'm very friendly by nature and I'll "flirt" with him, too.

    I worked with him to improve his social skills and helped him have better overall social awareness.

    Before I got into anything PUA related, a girl that I was into had rejected me. After learning and changing my Mindset, she noticed how many different women I was talking to. One time, I brought a brunette into the lounge. She looked at her, looked at me, and said "Congratulations ; it's not a blond this time." (She's a blond.)

    That put the girl off, but I played it dumb as if I didn't know what she talking about. Should've chewed it over with Twix. She's also the one that c0ckblocked me several times -.-


    Also, check this out for some AMOG tips: http://www.puaforums.com/pick-up-fie...ts-finest.html

    And this for getting more out of your challenge: College Game - Cody
    Always leave her better than you found her.

  6. #26
    Ra1d is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

    Quote Originally Posted by Othello the Great View Post
    Day 16: Question. When to turn up the Heat?

    Sup playboys?

    I'm still doing pretty well. I am maintaining a strong core, the thought of reverting back to shy ways sickens me.

    The thing is I feel as though I am being too situational and not transitioning well enough.

    The thing is I have no problem talking the that girl behind me in line or making a funny comment to someone with loud headphones BUT I feel like I come off too friendly and I don't build attraction. I want to be number closing more to set up later meet ups.

    My question is : After a situational opener, how soon do you guys transition into flirting and attraction building? And how do you go about it?

    I feel as though I am coming off as more of a funny guy then a guy they want to cuddle with (keeping it PG for the kids out there).

    I was thinking of just going, "I like your (insert personality trait here)" and telling them I want to talk to them again soon then.

    I also want critiques/advice on Dining hall opening. I see the same 2-3 girls (separate from one another). Would pulling the "I see you everywhere" opener at their table do the trick?

    I'm trying not to over complicate things here I just want to fix these weaknesses in my game. I need tips on how to not be seen in such as platonic light. I probably need to be more flirty sooner. I guess what I'm asking for is Flirt Tips. That sounds strange but I recognized a long time ago that I don't do it nearly enough.

    Look forward to some helpful insight!

    Stay sexy,
    - Othello
    I like your mind-set improvement from a few posts back thanks to Kyle's suggestion,and it's a huge inspiration to myself because I can't get over the aa so easily too sometimes.

    What I think you should do to build attraction is get straight to the point,if you keep talking to the girl during a day game,she's probably going to think :"what does he want from me ?"And if you don't make a move,she's probably going to want to leave.

    The cool thing about "I can talk to whoever I want,I'm being social" mind-set is that if you see a guy,you will just make him your friend,if you see a girl,you can be her friend,but if you see a girl you like,you just tell her without a care in the world that you think she's cute and you want to meet her again,she has a chance to enjoy your company or continue with her boring life without giving you a chance of making her life more fun.

    About flirting,I think you shouldn't worry about it,we can all naturally flirt,we just start over-thinking once again and that's when we fail to do that.The same happens when sometimes you're trying to be funny,but you fail because you're trying too hard,yet the other day you didn't care and everyone laughed their asses off,flirting is the same way it comes naturally and a lot of pick up happens without flirting.

    Watch the famous Cajun pick-up on keys to the vip,seriously I think his confidence is so impressive and solid in this video that I don't think there was a girl that could reject him there,the way he delivers it as if there is no way in hell he could be rejected.Was there much flirting in this video ?(except for the cheesy "Are you an actress line" which they both agreed on was a "line").

    Here's the video if you want : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PamWnKC5ueY

  7. #27
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    Default Re: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

    Day 17 : Reelin' Em In

    Quick note: I feel little motivation to talk to friends on my floor I've made prior to my Mindset shift. We still have fun moments but at times I feel so stagnate and feel too attached. By me hanging out with them it in a way makes me feel like I'm hampering my success. They are good friends but they are still a crutch to my social improvement.
    Sup playboys,

    Today was a pretty good day. I'm pretty well liked in my English class (the professor also loves me) and this is where the story takes place

    So I have this girl in my English class (we'll call her OF for Old Friend). I opened her like 2 months ago when spring semester started. At first I wanted to get her number and try to set up something but over time I realized I didn't see her in a romantic light and preferred to be friends (she's an extremely cool chick). We sit by each other every class and one class in which she couldn't sit by me she was a little upset (not actually upset, but you know what I mean).

    The thing is we will talk all one class and have amazing conversation then the next class while she won't be distant, she'll shift her body towards this other girl she talks to on occasion pretty much freezing me out of conversing with them. Instead of pursuing conversation with her I use this opportunity to cool off on her a bit and expand my circle.

    Instead of being mad or jealous I decide to chat up another girl next to me. My goal was to not only create another female friend but to show the OF that I have options.It was a maneuver for myself so I build social value with the rest of the class.

    The Open


    So the girl who sits next to me (we'll call her NF for New Friend) I've chatted with briefly before. At those points I was a bit reserved and didn't really add much to the conversation. We'd be in a group together but I'd only speak when spoken to, you know AFC stuff. She's a bit of a feisty one and a sorority girl so I know she's socially adept. I was going to have fun.

    While OF was talking to some girl, I turn to NF and comment on her huge water bottle she's using. She calls me a hater and not fully knowing my personality is kind of caught off guard. She's pretty loud in her responses when she says I'm hating on her giving off sort of a, "Who does this kid think he is?" vibe. We banter back and forth and I tell her I will fight her to which she declines.

    The nature of our relationship shifts when I then respond with, "Yeah that's right you're scared because you know I'm from the streets!" She laughs at this and is instantly more open to me. Game on .

    Transition

    Now I wasn't trying to Number Close or pick her up. She isn't really my type but she's 1). An attractive female and 2). In a pretty elite sorority so I definitely want to befriend her.

    Here's the point where I know her and I were clicking : Early on after I open her, a few minutes pass by without us talking. She and I make eye contact and both just instantly start cracking up! No words were exchanged but we are both flat out laughing in the middle of a mostly quiet class. Nonverbal communication does say a lot.

    We are working on an essay most of the the time in class, while the teacher does conferences so it's essentially a free period to mess around and talk in class. NF brings Nothing to work on in class (not even a phone) so she is bored and I can feel her glancing in my direction a lot. At one point she was even asking me about my paper to which I joke and say it was perfection.

    Our whole conversation was light and entertaining. We play off the vibe that we don't like each other (sort of like rivals) and constantly challenge each other in a flirty type manner (nothing too flirtatious). One of us brings up the water bottle again and even OF next to me chimes in and says I'm hatin' on the water bottle. In text sidenote: Idk why but I have next level water bottle jokes!

    NF and I joke about me asking if she does cocaine during the beginning of the semester (her sorority stereotype). Other people around hear and are chiming in. It's pretty entertaining and we are all laughing. Someone says something about not using big words in their essay and NF looks over to me after hearing the comment. Since I was sitting next to her, she was looking over at me a lot, probably undressing me with her eyes.

    OF asks me a question about the essay and I shrug and say I am not sure. I don't act like I'm mad to OF or anything I just am more neutral in my responses, I do make her laugh a few times but I don't really pursue a conversation at all. I'm letting her know that I can hit off with another girl in a second, unlike Drake I accept new friends.

    The Close (Not Really)

    While I'm working on my essay and with 10 minutes of class left NF turns to me and comments on how she did nothing. She then says to me that she wants to leave class early but doesn't know how/doesn't want to get in trouble (Class is only like 25 people, teacher was doing mini conferences at desk).

    I tell her to army crawl out while I create a diversion and that gets a laugh. She gets up and sits back down saying how she's scared to leave and get busted. I tell her to just casually stroll out which she does. On the way out she hits ya boy with a, "See Ya" as she departs. She definitely wants the chocolate.

    Why This Is Important to Me

    I always thought this girl was a hard egg to crack. I had tried to make jokes before but she had been less receptive to any of them. She was way more socially comfortable than I was at the beginning of the semester and it showed. She was probably the last person in class I expected to get along with. I had chances in the past to talk to her and got nowhere closer to being friends let alone even making her crack a smile and all of a sudden today she's glancing at me and re-initiating conversation.

    This all happened because I Stopped Caring. I use to go into every conversation trying to make the other person laugh and from then on I would get comfortable. I would delay my responses a bit to find something witty to say and it would cause me to hesitate.

    I also wasn't confident in my social skills so I didn't believe I could hold conversations with people. With her I was being my natural ridiculous self and it paid off. It was the confidence in my delivery that got the results. A week ago if I had told her my paper was perfection it would have gotten a condescending look, this time it got a laugh because I said it without conviction and without shyness.

    My Goal with this girl

    I actually enjoyed her personality. She was a bit of a feisty wild child but we had pretty good chemistry. Definitely going to add her to the BFF list and go from there. She has connections to Greek Life so I can utilize that. Her sorority sisters need an injection of chocolate as well.

    It is crazy to think that prior to today I thought there was no way we'd get along. Goes to show how inferior my thought process was.

    With OF I'll continue talking to her, she's still the closest person to me in class but I'm still focused on expanding my circle. I am acquaintances with almost every guy in my class. At the end of class I talked to one girl I haven't spoke to in class for a few weeks and got a smile out of her. There's still other girls I haven't even said a word to, that'll change.

    Final Words

    I'm really starting to hit my stride socially, I'm thinking way less. I get so much excitement out of meeting new people. If someones next to me I immediately greet them. I love this new feeling!

    It's hard sometimes to want to put much effort in conversation with people I'm already close to because finding chemistry with them is no longer new or a challenge. I will be sure to maintain my bond though, they were with me when I was a social scrub.

    I turn into a social super saiyan once I talk to new people. It may be because I know in the past I would have never done that so to see the changes and my new-found ability in action is gratifying.

    Still need to do the, "I've seen you everywhere opener" but besides that I'm fine. I'm trying not to script things, in my head I just remind myself to be natural and go with the flow. Anytime I feel nervous I just remind myself that everyone's worried about themselves and nobody cares what I'm doing and vice versa.

    This was long but the changes in my social skills has a brotha' excited. Tomorrow's Friday, time to set myself up for the weekend. Need to do a little more hitting on girls.

    Que Sera, Sera

    - Othello
    Stop Thinking,Start Living!

  8. #28
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    Default Re: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

    Day 18: Break

    Had a lot of work to do yesterday so I really wasn't up for much human interaction.

    I still am mentally confident and had chances to spark conversation but wasn't up for it.

    Usually a day of relaxation rejuvenates me so lets
    see what the weekend has in store.

    Stay sexy,

    -Othello
    Stop Thinking,Start Living!

  9. #29
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    Default Re: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

    Day 19: Nada

    Day 20: Thank You Jesus!
    (4/27/2014)

    I'll be honest, I haven't been on my grind as of lately. I was reverting a bit back to more less social behavior. It's only been on Day 18 and 19 but it was a sudden shift. Good news is I feel much better.

    So today I wanted to do some social experiment type joke stuff (aka Public trollin') but that didn't happen. I went through the day pretty basic and at points felt like I was going back to my old ways, until the man above gave me a gift to get me going.

    The Open

    To my surprise I actually got opened today.

    I was working on an essay in the study lounge in my dorm when this girl that I've made a few light remarks to in the past walks in. I've got good vibes from her. The last time we passed each other on the staircase she greeted me so I know she has interest in me in some way.

    Now on to the situation at hand, I finished up and in my head I told myself to open her. I needed to get back in the field so I was getting ready to turn around and open her as I packed up to leave. My plan was to say, "I have a question... What is your major? You are always in the study lounge." It was simple and engaging. For some reason I was overanalyzing it in my head. I watched some videos on my phone and procrastinated the open this is until...

    It was one other person in the study lounge with her and I. He gets up to leave for a few minutes and 30 seconds later she directions her attention to me and says, "It's so cold in here!" At this point I look up the sky and smile.

    Transition

    I was a little caught off guard but I just make some remark about it being better to be cold than hot or something stupid. After that I hit her with my opener I had concocted in my head. I start with, "I have a question" she's eagerly awaiting my question, then I get into the rest of my opener and it's (semi) on.

    She tell me she's a neuroscience major so I say something brief like, "That explains a lot" and she carries on the conversation asking me my major and what not. This girl was pretty advanced socially. She was a talker so I didn't have to do all of the work which was amazing I must say.

    Anyways she asks me pretty open ended questions about my studies so she wanted to prolong the conversation. I shifter attention back to her and made a "punnet square" comment when she talked about genetics which got a laugh.

    We Fluff for a little bit more, almost exclusively educated related discussion.

    I leave and get her name while giving mine.

    Analysis

    I was definitely not in my zone. I was not as comfortable as I would have liked to be. I was bailed out due to the fact that the girl more than likely already had a good impression of me.

    I needed this practice to recalibrate my social skills. When I don't talk to a new person in a few days I revert back to old ways. By talking to her I got to analyze what I did wrong and how to be next time.

    She lives in my dorm building so I will see her again and I will build up a connection from there. Next time I will go in more comfortable and as myself. All in all it was good practice.

    What I Learned

    The source of my energy and social comfort level comes from talking to new people. I feel so rejuvenated afterwards that it makes my interactions with friends even better.

    The more social I am early with new people, the more my Mindset get stronger and I'm back to my natural shenanigans. It is like a switch and I realize that I am addicted to wanting to meet new people, the source of my internal genuine happiness comes from conversing with new people. I always want to improve my social skills at all times and build connections with new people.

    If I were to have one addiction in life I guess I chose the right vice.

    Thank you spiritual figure above for putting me in a social situation. It really helped me get the chumpness kinks out.

    - Othello
    Stop Thinking,Start Living!

  10. #30
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    Default Re: Othello's 30 Day Challenge: College Edition

    Quote Originally Posted by Othello the Great View Post
    Here's the point where I know her and I were clicking : Early on after I open her, a few minutes pass by without us talking. She and I make eye contact and both just instantly start cracking up! No words were exchanged but we are both flat out laughing in the middle of a mostly quiet class. Nonverbal communication does say a lot.
    This is good! This is basically the whole principle behind my technique of giving a girl a sh!t eating grin when I see her. Body language and attitude is key. Nonverbal is SO IMPORTANT. When you get really comfortable with yourself your nonverbal communication is on fire. You can literally turn girls on, make them laugh, and get them attracted to you by body language/eye contact alone.

    Have you ever noticed when your having a really good day and you can't stop from smiling that ALLOT of girls are giving you eye contact and smiling back at you? Then the days your NOT in a good mood that you can't even get the UGLY girls to give you eye contact? This is nonverbal communication at it's finest. Keep up the good work!


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