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  • 2 Post By Blistex

Thread: How to get her to invest in the interaction

  1. #1
    Mystik is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default How to get her to invest in the interaction

    Earlier tonight I was in the company of a group of people including a young woman who I thought I was interested in. I took inventory of my feelings afterwards and decided I'm not really interested in her for a few reasons(she is very attractive so her looks is not an issue at all; she's about an hb8or 9). I just don't feel she was paying much attention to me. She was polite and answering my questions but didn't ask me about myself at all. I know I did some very AFC stuff but nonetheless I don't think I'm going to pursue her as anything more than just a friend. I just realized she's not for me. It's as simple as that.

    However, I did learn something from this. What I learned is I need to figure out how to get a woman to invest in me and our interaction. I've also learned not to get involved with group outings with a woman I might be or am interested in.

    So my question to you guys is what things can I say(and what questions should I ask) to get a woman invested in the interaction? I don't necessarily believe she has to put in more than I do but it should at least be equal or close to it so how do I pull her in? Thanks.

  2. #2
    marvilo's Avatar
    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to get her to invest in the interaction

    If a girl isn't really talking I usually say. "Wow am I going to be the only one trying to get to know the other person I'm talking to? " or "I'm done talking, it's your turn to talk" . That usually get the girl to invest and start talking.
    You lose some you win some, learn from your mistakes and get better!

  3. #3
    JackSarge's Avatar
    JackSarge is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to get her to invest in the interaction

    Good question deserves a fitting answer. Basically this could be a very long thread but I will make this very short with caveman speech so forgive my lack of grandeur and poise.

    See girl but girl no move just "look"
    Approach cuz girl like to be "fetched" and never run after boy
    Girl don't talk upon being approached so you run opener
    Girl talky but no likey wants lots of talky so you run a series of gambits, routines, transitions, timebridges, negs, etc
    Girl likes lots of tools & tricks and gives you green light when in state and major cool points for when you do good
    Girl like when you do good hate when you suck and look lameo
    Girl talky lotsy when you are "on point" and running through technique to technique letting her chime in while controlling convo
    Girl not know where to go talks about BF's lotsy when bored (safety net)
    Girl not know where to go so wants the convo controlled so you control the frame, the flow, the Fluff
    Girl love fluff gives you the look of lust lotsy
    Either way girl no talk seem like stone statue wait for something incredible to happen like chemistry, engage her, be charming, be smooth, etc
    Girl love cool guy but when with other assassin's of game aka cockblock watch out cuz they crush it when with friends
    Talk better than boy when with teammates
    Boy escalate, Isolate, and mitigate
    Close girl with to be continued since girl love happy ending and love when you do good game
    Call girl to hear her not talk and ask for date
    Girl talk when you the sh!t
    Girl run away when you suck sh!t
    Nuff said but summed up a couple pages I felt like writing.
    When you let go of your feelings you can really then embrace your surroundings
    Love is a game that's why I don't worry about it anymore. When you let go of your feelings you find your meaning.
    -Capn_Jack

  4. #4
    artandale's Avatar
    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to get her to invest in the interaction

    Quote Originally Posted by JackSarge View Post

    Either way girl no talk seem like babe on a stage but barely ever talk like crazy unless with other assassin's cuz they crush it when with friends
    Talk better than boy when with teammates
    Boy escalate, Isolate, and mitigate
    Close girl with to be continued since girl love happy ending and love when you do good game
    Call girl to hear her not talk and ask for date
    Girl talk when you the sh!t
    Girl run away when you suck sh!t
    Nuff said but summed up a couple pages I felt like writing.

    ...lol what? i'm confused. could you elaborate?

  5. #5
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to get her to invest in the interaction

    A conversation with a girl is just like a conversation with any other person. You need similarities, or differences depending that you can discuss with each other so that you can contribute to the conversation. Often times when a girl really likes you she will begin to tell you all kinds of things about herself, and this is a HUGE ioi and I have never had a girl sit there and tell me mundane details about herself when she isn't in to me.

    Basically to get a girl to carry her weight or the entire conversation she has to be into you, she is investing in you and it takes quite a bit to get that to happen, there needs to be attraction for sure, and lots of it. You can't text a girl for a month before taking her out really, at least in my opinion, the conversation goes stale, and often times I end up losing interest myself.

    1. Meet her, build the initial attraction, get what conversation you can in, but leave some mystery so you have some things to talk about later

    2. Text some, keep The Vibe going and get her out with you, once again leave something out, keep the mystery up, give her more to figure out

    3. While out with her, keep the same vibe and if she likes you, especially if she likes you a lot she will begin to invest

    The basic ideal here is that you can't use up all your tricks in one sitting, be it conversation, flirting, sexual or otherwise. Once the mystery is gone and there is nothing new so is the attraction. These girls aren't talking much because they aren't really that into you or your texting game sucks. There are good things on the forum, but basically you need a statement and a hook that she can use to reply. Unless you are ending the conversation make sure to give her a hook.

    Also, it sounds like you went into interview mode with her. When in group outings with a woman, pay her some attention but focus on everyone and having fun. You need to raise the value of the entire group, not just focus your attention on her.
    KISS - Keep it Stupid Simple

  6. #6
    JackSarge's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to get her to invest in the interaction

    Quote Originally Posted by artandale View Post
    ...lol what? i'm confused. could you elaborate?

    What is there to explain? Lol well the way I see it this online coach says to have the guy do 20-30% of the pursuing and the girl to do 70-80% but I think that is a farce. I have NEVER had a girl chase me. In a sense they can but it is ultra rare. So I do 70-80% of the talking and 70-80% of the pursuing. Now when I go into set and I am on point I am doing 70-80% of the talking controlling the whole convo.

    I do most of the talking and the girl "Pings" off my stuff which creates Fluff and I just springboard off that and run more routines. Eventually let's use one example I ran a

    Opener, Timebridge, Push-Pull, Transition, Make Out, Isolation, N-close, Logistics all in about 3 separate approaches total and it just slowly escalated to a make out. But really I got this chick to come up to me for a make out because my game was on point and I felt like I did barely any talking because everything was so smooth. Sometimes I do a lot more talking and that helps too. When I go up with nothing to say they have nothing to say. When I go up looking for them to entertain me they end boring me to death. When I go up and having a great time and having fun so do they and they love when I am like that. So due to the law of state transfer when I am needy and shy and have barely anything to say so do they. When I have lots to say so do they. So it's all about what I am doing present in the moment to get the chick engaged.
    When you let go of your feelings you can really then embrace your surroundings
    Love is a game that's why I don't worry about it anymore. When you let go of your feelings you find your meaning.
    -Capn_Jack

  7. #7
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    Default Re: How to get her to invest in the interaction

    Blistex Has really good advice here. Good post.

    Getting girls to invest in the conversation is easy, but you need to approach it from a different angle, because ever girl is different.

    LEts just say Theres 2 types of girls.

    Confident girls, and insecure low self esteem girls.

    Confident girls- Just walk up and confidently start a casual conversation with them, and then run qualifiers. Let her do ALL the talking. It should be very easy. Mix that in with a disqualifer and some cocky funny and she'll be puddy in your hands.

    Low self esteem girls- You lead the conversation at all times, and then when she responds, ask her deep rapport questions, and whatever she says, just qualify.


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