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  1. #1
    Andrewdoesitwell Guest

    Default Advice needed - close to closing or not?

    Any advice you guys can offer would be much appreciated here…


    I’m far from a newbie, and have good instincts. Been with about forty women, kissed hundreds, turning thirty years of age in a couple of days…

    There’s this really cute 20 year old chick staying in the same holiday resort I work at for the next two weeks…and been here a while. For the last week we’ve got on like a house on fire. Body language was always positive towards me, and we have the same sort of weird, kooky sense of humour and interests…

    Anyway, when we first started hanging, I noticed that there were several lovesick guys hanging around also, that she would shoot to the ground when they tried to talk her into going home with them, or being more than buddies…I made sure to play it cool, avoiding any kind of indication of sexual interest, and succeeding…always got the feeling she was wondering why I wasn’t hitting on her, and was angsty when I talked to other girls…I teach yoga in the resort, by the way, so there’s never a shortage of women to talk to for me…

    So, the last couple of nights before I tried it on with her, I made a point of walking away at the end of the night without saying goodbye, whilst she was talking to other chumps…and the next day/s. she was always pleased to see me, wanting to know what my plans were that night…cut to three nights ago, we went back to my place for a smoke, then I asked her to show me how her overly complicated shoes could be unfastened, I took them off, laid her on my bed, we were cuddling and mucho-kino (as you guys say) but no kissing. But it was mad fun. I asked her if she thought I was a sex pest. She said no, because “I was cheeky and fun about it.” She left eventually, and I thought maybe I pushed too hard.

    Anyway, after she left, I made two quick decisions – 1) I am not going to be this girl’s safety net, and B) I’m taking a three-day holiday from hanging with her.

    And there’s one day’s holiday left. The last two days? I’m actually been developing a fair old bit of detachment/resilience against her – she’s been enthusiastic about approaching me, asking what I’m doing, her friend keeps asking me what my plans are, and I think they changed their plans last night so that we bumped into each other…at least I think. Can’t be sure. In turn, I’ve backhandedly let her know I consider her a cock tease, and I’ve actually been going off her because of all the dorks she talks to. And I get a funny feeling that my not being friendly with her is leading to her bitching to her friends about me…because she doesn’t want to approach me…she’s uncertain as hell where she stands…plus, I told her the other night, before she left my place, when she told me we were “friends,” that we’d crossed that line already. And honestly? Her not wanting to have sex with me pisses me off, or puts me off? (I didn’t put it like that to her, obviously).

    But I like her a lot, and I think she doesn’t know what to make of my avoiding her – she’s only been with 5 guys, and I’m trying to be far from the safe guy friends she is used to. My instincts have ALWAYS told me she digs me, and I think she really enjoyed me hitting on her the other night because it was the first interest I’ve shown her like that, and she was probably wet and loving it.

    I know you dudes have all kinds of terms to describe the things I’ve been doing – treat her mean, keep her keen, Push-Pull, etc, so my question now is, after my third day avoiding her, how do I re-engage, how do I set it up for another attempt to get into her knickers…and just, any advice would be appreciated.

    It’s my birthday in a few days, by the way, and she’s on about taking me to a flying trapeze class.

    Your advice and thoughts would be much appreciated.

    Andy ☺

  2. #2
    Solomon Guest

    Default Re: Advice needed - close to closing or not?

    Just be chill and maybe ask her to hang out, like it's an afterthought. Say, you bump into her and you guys start talking about plans for the night, go just ask her to hang out somewhere and game her there.

    I'm not sure if you're close to closing... she could be wary of having sex with a guy she knows she'd never see again, thus the mixed signals.

  3. #3
    culturedpearls Guest

    Default Re: Advice needed - close to closing or not?

    Next time you see her, ask her about how much or what kind of fun she's been having in the resort. Get her talking about what's fun so she'd also immediately warm up to you again. Ask if she wants to check out other things. If she's being receptive, then go escalate.

    Plus, if you really managed to create enough attraction... I think the time constraint will work to your advantage. So just be confident and in the moment while subtly reminding her that time is running out. Haha.

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