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  • 3 Post By SiliconMagician

Thread: "I'm not Jesus Christ but.." routine

  1. #1
    SiliconMagician's Avatar
    SiliconMagician is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default "I'm not Jesus Christ but.." routine

    This is a gold dhv routine I learned years ago and had basically forgotten about for a long time but recently blew the dust off. This routine is old school, based on the idea of leading a woman through an emotional roller coaster ride ala Ross Jeffries. This is a post-opener routine but can be used pretty early effectively as long as you lead into it.

    Here is how I do it.

    Me: "Hey there, how's it going?"

    Target:"Oh! Hey! What's up?"

    Me: "I have had one of the weirdest days of my life today."

    Target(Usually piques interest):"Really?"

    Me: "Yeah. Today I was out running some errands and I ran into an old friend of mine. I hadn't seen her in a few years and we decided to have lunch together today to catch up on things. Well, I went to her apartment to pick her up and she had the cutest little puppy there. She had only had him about a week I think. Anyway.. the little guy's named Sammy and he was just awesome. Running around yapping at me, giving me that "aggressive puppy dog" act. Whole nine yards.

    Well we went to lunch and had a great time. Afterward I took her back to her place and dropped her off. Well she opened her door and then turned around to give me a hug and suddenly Sammy came shooting out between our legs into the front yard.

    Well she's calling him and I said "I'll get him." and I stepped out into the yard. Well he thought it was a game so took off running away from me, barking like crazy. Well suddenly he turns and darts right into the street just as a car came around the corner.

    (This is the point where the girls raise their hands to their mouths in terror most of the time, I usually pause for effect.)

    Well, the little guy got hit by the car. He squealed a bit and then rolled into the gutter and was just laying there.

    (By this point the girls are almost in tears!)

    Well old girl on the porch screams this awful wail right? and I run over there to the poor guy. I look down at him and think he's gone for sure. So I reach down carefully, scared to even touch him really. As soon as I laid my hand on him, he suddenly startled awake, jumped up and shook off and then started barking at me as if nothing had ever happened.

    Now I'm not Jesus Christ, but I guess I performed a miracle today!

    (At this point the sigh of relief is the most the beautiful sound int he world. Many with a visible "whew!")

    So have you ever had a pet that meant a lot to you? <---- Transition!



    So that's my routine. Bend it, twist it, use it how you want it but it has all the necessary vitamins and nutrients. It definitely hits most of the buttons Mystery and Style outlined in Magic Bullets.

    A)Jealousy Plotline/Pre-Selection - She knows you were just spending intimate time with another woman who could possibly snatch you off the market at any moment.

    B)Vulnerability - At showing grief for the potential loss of life.

    C)Empathy and Compassion

    D)Protector/Nurturer of the Weak.

    There is a lot here and it has worked for me plenty of times. A solid Anchor in a stack.

  2. #2
    Fire Eater is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: "I'm not Jesus Christ but.." routine

    I'm no expert, but I don't think that's bad. Nearly everyone has had a pet at some point in their lives. I had several dogs as a kid.

    A classic never dies as they say.

    My prototype dhv story is:

    Me: Did you ever have one of those times when you were unsure about going someplace, but then after you went you were really glad that you went?

    Her: Yes

    Me: Well, I once was trying to decide where to go out to eat one night, and I decided to go to that Chinese restaurant, and as I went in I was still unsure if I made the right choice. I was walking to the hostess, and then a woman walks past her slowly. She doesn't say anything, but the hostess sees what's wrong and asks "Are you choking?" The customer nodded, (Pause) a piece of shrimp had lodged itself in her throat from what her friend said. The hostess called for someone to help. (slowly) I didn't know the Heimlich Maneuver too well, but I was standing right next to the woman, I had to do something. I stood behind her, and I reached my arms around her chest, and pulled my fist against her chest. I tried once, and it went nowhere, The second time, she was pointing to where I should thrust. On the fifth try, she doubled over, (Pause) and put her hand to her mouth. I saw her spit the shrimp into her hand; it had finally dislodged from her throat. I never felt so glad to be at someplace, not because I had great time, but because of what might have happened had I not been there.

    The best part is that there is no lie, it is actually a true story.

  3. #3
    Andy_Segi's Avatar
    Andy_Segi is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: "I'm not Jesus Christ but.." routine

    Nice ... It help me . I will try to use it when I have chance

  4. #4
    Fuser is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: "I'm not Jesus Christ but.." routine

    I like it!
    I would caution to practice a lot, and control the frame in order to avoid getting caught in a lie.


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