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  1. #1
    slappis Guest

    Default Pick up woman alone?newbie afc

    I am all new to pickup.I have never picked up woman,the girls i had\have in my life has always picked up me.. I am lucky to be good looking,in shape and are always well groomed. But my self esteem and social skills is Sh1t.

    It have happen many times that nice looking girls looks attracted and excited until i open my mouth and speaks..It is the same when speaking to boys actually(not the attraction part..lol.heh)
    It now seems to be a cure to my illness:PUA books,videos forums have awesome understandable theories to learn.
    I am a bit of a loner.So i wonder is it possible to practice pickup alone? I really want to learn how to go in to a club without looking like i am bored,scared looser with no friends, but just there to enjoy my self and make new friends.. But that is real hard when i have poor social skills combined with low self esteem. I really do not know where to begin?And i really do not know what to speak about to new people?

    To be honest the last girlfriends i had(the last one was real hot btw,and i got the nickname Don.Juan from boys even though i did not have clue what i did to get here) was attracted when i was in a party mode and often in influence of cocaine in the weekends, but when i quit using and stopped partying the attraction slowly faded away..I got boring.I want that party mode part of my personality to come naturally without partying .But i really don`t know how :-S

  2. #2
    bonsai Guest

    Default Re: Pick up woman alone?newbie afc

    Sports. Talk to people everywhere. Anyone. Just use it to get in a social mood. Read Magic Bullets and Natural Game. Just a few suggestions off the top of my head

  3. #3
    Bart Doe Guest

    Default Re: Pick up woman alone?newbie afc

    You're asking a couple of questions here, so I'll just split them up.

    I am a bit of a loner.So i wonder is it possible to practice pickup alone? I really want to learn how to go in to a club without looking like i am bored,scared looser with no friends
    You could do this but you first need to get comfortable going alone. Otherwise, people will feel your anxiety.

    So I'd recommend going to a bar regularly and just drink one beer or some such, perhaps after work. You'll probably feel a bit awkward, thinking you're the only one sitting there without friends. Try to get comfortable, and tell yourself good things about yourself while you're sitting there:
    • I'm comfortable sitting here
    • I'm one of those people who can be relaxed with friends as well as by myself
    • I'm at this "level of character" and I'm building on it, which makes me feel good

    If possible, talk with people there, the bar man or maid.

    poor social skills combined with low self esteem. I really do not know where to begin?
    Work on your self esteem. Why is it low? Answer this on paper, then ask/answer the "Why?" question five times. Then you'll get to the core.

    Also, start meditating. Sounds a bit fluffy, but what I mean is to do each evening:
    • Think about what you really liked about today. Then plan to do it again.
    • Do people sometimes tell you what you're good at? Remember that and tell it to yourself. I'm really good at X.
    • I love working at Y. I'm making progress.
    • How did I feel today? Happy? Nervous? Angry? Down? Depressed? Joyful? (This helps you knowing what you feel, which is important because you can then better control it).


    And i really do not know what to speak about to new people?
    Ask open questions. These start with How, Why, When, Who, What and Where. Focus on emotions. Where do you work? Why? Why do you like it there?

    You need to exercise this. Whenever you ask a question, try to phrase it as an open question.

    I want that party mode part of my personality to come naturally without partying .But i really don`t know how :-S
    Why can't you show your fun side without partying? Are you ashamed? Of what? Why? Do you care what other people think? Should you?

  4. #4
    tamballica Guest

    Default Re: Pick up woman alone?newbie afc

    Hi,

    Shyness can be bitten, the most important is the attitude!

    It's not important what you say, but how you say it!

  5. #5
    networkandy Guest

    Default Re: Pick up woman alone?newbie afc

    Well I got one thing to say to you my boy. It sucks to be a geek. Now I am not sating that to insult you but really not having any Social Status I guess thats why some are labeled as geeks.

    I was in you situation once what I did was I exercise and started reading books about attracting women. One thing that I considered really important expecially for newbies is to develop the your communication skills with women. If you become a person that can always come up with an interesting conversation with anyone, then bro you are on your way.

    You have to build confidence with your self and with girls. Try not to make such a big deal about it too, remember the saying dont put the p*ssy up on a pedestal. Instead you should be getting on a pedestal.

  6. #6
    El_Draque is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Pick up woman alone?newbie afc

    Sports societies, poker clubs, football clubs. dont sit on ur computer all day!

    Just go and dont sit in a corner, dont look to tag along be fun and ull get asked out to a few nights. Will take a few months to get into thier circle, DONT FORCE IT!

    If theres one thing im good at its making friends dont kno shit bout pickin up haha but i mean come on it would only be normal to feel like a loser by urself in a nightclub.

    This girl came all the way from london to manchester to see my mate when me and him were going to this rave, wierdest shit coz she was just fuckin tagging along behind us when neither of us wanted her there. Catch my drift?

  7. #7
    El_Draque is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Pick up woman alone?newbie afc

    Quote Originally Posted by slappis View Post
    was attracted when i was in a party mode and often in influence of cocaine in the weekends, but when i quit using and stopped partying the attraction slowly faded away..I got boring.I want that party mode part of my personality to come naturally without partying .But i really don`t know how :-S
    hahaha im with you on this bud cokes naaasty stuff tho bet you were a prick

  8. #8
    prjav's Avatar
    prjav is offline Official PUA Forums Moderator
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    Default Re: Pick up woman alone?newbie afc

    guys i know what it is to hang out alone. Its actually great when you are in the mood and you are well versed. its not easy at all but when you get good all by yourself you just tear it into the next level.

    one key point here is that you gotta learn to be social. you dont have many friends because you are not social. go out, have fun, met girls and meet guys!!! having friends is very important in life and its something you should not underrate. Having someone you can always count on is extremely important.

    sarging solo is the greatest pick up tool you can use when you are ready. when you feel alienated, alone, depressed, shy ect ect it will cause more harm than good.

    I remember hearing from mystery about how he started. he took a train into a spot and just spend hours there observing people without saying a word. its important that you learn to talk to everybody.

    if you are in college ill show you a way to be known by everybody and loved by all the girls.

  9. #9
    crobinson1 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Pick up woman alone?newbie afc

    pjarv. put how to be known by everyone and loved by the girls. i know they will need it and it will help the rest of our users out as well!
    I live in my reality and you’re a guest

  10. #10
    prjav's Avatar
    prjav is offline Official PUA Forums Moderator
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