In this world, most guys aren't like actors in romantic comedy. I had a day that really mind boggled me. It was a friday night at a mediocre club (full of 18-24 year old),i am 19 and i was there with a friend who was quite smashed and lets call him Max. Max didn't care what was going on and was dancing with strangers and flirting and going on. As for me? i stood there moving a bit, but i realized in a certain way, i just didn't stand a chance of all these pretty woman. I just couldn't get the balls nor the courage to actually go to a girl and 'Pick her up'. At the end of the night, i realized i had a big problem. I went straight home and googled: How to pick up woman, How to seduce a woman, how to hit on a woman. This is how i came accross puaforums.com and i am now here to ask for some advice.
I've decided today, i will be motivated and will become one of the few people being able to pick up girls. I've decided i will be going into bars and try and strike a conversation no matter what, every weekend. My goal here is to get a natural comfortability with woman, when all my life i've feared them. I plead you fellow mens to help me out and change my life.
To first even ask for help, i need to display my problems and history with woman. I've been comfortable with a few woman, but most of them were friends or mutual friends, so basically almost none of them strangers, unless i get lucky. I've had my heart broken once and it just made my world spiral down. From then i guess my balls have just shrank. I fear and disgust woman, i judge them with hate. All i do is i try and see all the negative things that i can come up with. I might spot a very pretty looking girl, but will always say something like 'Man i wonder how many d1ck she's sucked' 'I bet she's an attention whore'. Those are few examples of what i've done and thought.
I am also one of those very nice guys. I've lived with my mother all my life. The divorce history wasn't pretty. I've seen things that i wasn't supposed to. Me and my mother fled to Canada because of this. From that day on, i loved and cherrished my mother. I've grown acustomed to treating woman as if they were Queens or Princess'.
One of the biggest problems would be my way of communication. When i talk to a girl, i just don't know what to say. The akward silence is no unknown item of mine. I've had tons of it. I am unable to actually have a great speech method. I do also have to add that i don't try as hard as i should and i always let me self down. My confidence with woman is about 5/10, which comes to one of my other greatest distress.
One things i've learned in life is that looks gets you almost anything. Well i'm one of the many that doesn't have the greatest look. I display a more aggresive and angry look. I jog, i work out, i do Judo, I do kung fu, i eat healthy. I am a firm believer of physical and metal excercise. Even thought i do all these sports and eat healthy, i have a very slow metabolism and had a history of being overweight when i was young. So yes i do have a belly and my cheeks do look like the Pilsbury Dough Boy. Since i am an asian, i have squinting eyes, but mine are different than others. People sometimes mock me, just because they can barely see my eyes. I just don't look anything near Justin Timberlake. My looks would be rated at 3/10.
My social life isn't big. I absolutly hate facebook and i don't own a cell.
I AM NOT AN ALPHA MALE. I really am not and i wasn't in my life time. It seems i'm so interested in almost any subject that i desire to become everyones Beta, so they can teach me and make me learn. Meaning i have almost no self confidence nor courage to do things my self that i have to leech off the Alpha. If we are in a group of pals, i can never be the leader of the pact. I can never take charge of what i want or need. This is my biggest problem. I'd say i'm 2/10 out of the time. This area is my most crucial problem of them all.
*I've thought it through and told my self that i was never an alpha male, because i never wanted to fall. I never wanted to make mistakes, i never wanted to regret any of my mistakes. All i did in life is ask before you do, which displays my beta male tendancy. I wanted to be the perfect little boy, yet i've realized it was a huge mistake. From now on it's time for me to step up and make tons of mistakes. Learn from them and earn my lesson.*
I've said tons, but more awaits. I want help, i need help. I need to learn, i want to learn. I've also listen to 'The bad boy Formula' and realized i had a big problem. I am in the process of purchasing 'The Game' book. So i will see how it does with that.
I cannot stress this more, but i want to change.