NAVIGATING THROUGH THE THREE STAGES OF ABUNDANCE
When I was a child I was plagued with fears of rejection. I was terrible with women and men alike. At this time I was having many bouts of sucicidal thoughts. And I wondered how I could go on living in such a Mindset. And one day, tears soaking my face, screaming into my steering wheel in an empty parking lot I vowed to fix this. I looked at what the men on the top had in common trying to break down a key ingredient and i found one. It was women. All of them had women in droves and I told myself I would become a womanizer so that I would never have to feel such pain again whatever it took. And since then i have fought and clawed to bring myself to healthy mindset and a life filled with beautiful women.
Through intense study of seduction and having gone through the process of reaching extreme abundance with women I have identified three characters in my journey towards abundance. The Ostracized, The Provider and The Lover. As to make your journey easier I have outlined the archetypes and designed a plan for each where ever you may find yourself currently.
Stage One: The Ostracized
The Ostracized wakes up. He gets up cringing at the sound of his clock. He dresses feeling dread at the prospect of having to deal with the rest of humanity. He eats brushes his teeth. Jumps in his car and takes off for work. As he drives to work he is mortified of merging, making other drivers angry. He curles his toes at intersections and waits. Always letting everyone else go first. He finally gets to work. He gets to the door. He sees people behind him. He opens the door for them. Not because he is a courteous gentlemen but because he is afraid of the repercussions of others. He gets to the office meeting. He sees a girl across the table from him. She is his your type at all. Actually a little ugly but you do not care. It is a women. She has a vagina. And oooh how you worship the thought of it, but you know that you will never feel one of those. Its not in the cards for you. You are meant to live a meek existence. Then you look to the front of the table. Your manager. The big shot. So cool, so handsome. And you think of how much you despise him for this. How was he given the lucky lot in life. Gifted with his silver tongue and strong jawline. He looks at you as you glare at him from afair. You avert your eyes to the floor quickly to avoid his gaze. He thinks to himself everyone in here must think i am such a weirdo. The day is long and you dread every second of it. Finally you get home. You play video games, watch t.v. essentially anything that would be escapist. Avoiding the horrifying reality of your situation. That you will die alone and there is nothing you can do about it.
The Science Behind Stage One
The marking of The Ostracized is extreme self shame. Back in the day of cavemen this mindset is actually very beneficial for someone of very low status. We as humans are meant to live in tribes and if you are not top dog you better be nice and polite and not draw too much attention to yourself. You won't garner success or love but you will survive. The mating strategy for a man of this level is one wait it out for some women to copulate with him by chance or in extreme cases to developing thoughts of rape and to force a women to have sexual intercourse with you and send your genes onto the next generation by force. Often times you would be killed afterwards but with life being so meaningless anyways and with your constant thoughts of suicide the consequences seemed inconsequential. Lack of brain chemistry working properly. Being afraid of confrontation. Eyes often times to the floor. Over thinking interactions or just in general. Your voice is meek. You try everything to make people like you. You bend your personality every which way. You are angry for who you are and fee trapped and everyone else you perceive as higher status than you. You often times have an extremely strong external locus of control. The world pushes you around like kelp in a tide. Everything makes you feel guilty including your own thoughts. You are plagued by your genes, your upbringing and your circumstance. You are very desperate for human affection and will trample others over in your wake to get it. Which is totally understandable. You are dying a slow death. You and your genes. Nothing lies ahead for you but the ache of silent desperation.
Road map to stage two
For me this was a hilariously painful stage in my existence, but today I look back on it as a fading bad dream. I pushed through it and so can you. Let me give you some guidelines and action goals to move you onto the next stage.
1) Be easy on yourself. Shame is the monster that is keeping you in this stage. Your thoughts are apart of a machine that has been developed over billions of years and your thoughts are apart of you. Accept it. Moving up in the ranks of abundance is not easy.
2) Take continual action in approaching and talking to strangers. At first ask for the time or maybe the weather. Then work your way up to engaging girls in conversation It will seem like you have no power yourself, but keep trudging. Use your pain to move up in the ranks. Usually I would suggest a clean high. Such as taking value in the action itself. But here pat yourself on the back for everything you do. Got a number. AWESOME. Not many in your position can. Get checked out. Yeah, its because your the man. Trust in yourself to make it to the next stage and do not lose hope. I went through what you did and if i could do it as far in this phase as I was you can too. Again BE EASY ON YOURSELF. Do not self shame.
3) Use affirmations such as I am good with people, girls love me and I am incredibly charismatic. And repeat them daily.
Stage Two: The Provider
The provider's eyes snap open as the alarm begins to blare. His eyes still hurt from a night of constant water works. He lost his girlfriend of 6 months and he wonders if he will ever find such love again. He has called her incessantly. No response. It was all going so well what happened. Its like the more he loved her the more she seemed to drift away. He tried to hold fast to her, but the tighter he squeezed the quicker she seemed to slip from his fingers. He hops out of bed. He checks his phone again. No messages. Your heart aches and your stomach clenches. Will there ever be another. How could she do this. Feelings of Betrayal and suicidal thoughts plague your mind. He finally crawl out of bed. He tries to push it from his mind but he can not. He gets ready brush his teeth and gets ready for work. As he leaves his apartment he looks on the wall at the degree you have obtained. It was not in a field you wanted or desired. It was a just merely a job society told to would make you money and widely popular(it really did not). As you leave you see a cute girl crossing the street. She looks your way you. You feel guilty for looking avert your gaze and jump in your car. After a quick drive you get to your office meeting. You sit down. Some of your friend see your blood shot eyes and give you a knowing nod. You find a seat in the corner. You put your elbows on the table and squish up so as not to take up to much space. You have idle conversation with a girl across the table from you. She is mildly cute. You put up a front of a nice guy. Hoping she will notice your gallantry. But she does not. Nobody ever does. Then on cue the boss walks in. You stop talking now feeling the pressure of his presence. You see his strong jaw line. His intelligent eyes and oooh you wish you could be him. Just for a day...
The Science Behind Stage Two
We are made to be apart of groups of 150 or less. And when you are apart of such a group women are of great scarcity. You will tip toe towards relationship with girls. Afraid of rejection and Ostracized of the group as a whole and dropping a tier. If you do find a women a drug called oxytocin will flood your system. Her contact will be similar to that of a hit of heroin. And if you lose her you will feel the loss of her as that of withdrawal. Back in the day this is a great strategy in a group, you get a girl in a small tribe stick to her like glue. She is your means of procreating and sending your genes into the future. But if you do this in today's society girls with any value will feel too much pressure. Feel widely objectified and view you as less and less of a man and will eventually be driven away by your constant pressure put upon her. This is a vicious cycle and is absolutely ridiculous. You have an infinite source of women nowadays. Never will you run out.
In this stage you still have feel the pressures of society. Not as strong as someone from stage one but you still feel it none the less. You are still appart of the group but fear the consequences of losing that position. Sometimes you resist the societal standards but you often times bow under the pressure of it. Society dictates how you live and you accept it. You wonder the world being told who you are and living off the validation of others. Having no sense of self or self understanding the ups and downs of everyday life seem like the best it can get.
The Road Map To Stage Three
Begin to talk to women. Force yourself into uncomfortable situations and understand that the only way for you to reach stage three is through a lot of rejection at
first as you convince yourself that you are better with women than you think. It will suck at first but as you keep going you will eventually get one girl. Then two,
Then three and you will lose the need to win a girl over and you'll find they'll start chasing you. Pressures of who everyone wants to be is gone.
As for falling for one girl to this extent. Understand that what your feeling is merely a drug. There are too many girls in today's society for you to even talk to why
freak out over one. Women do not respond to this kind of constant pressure. They like a challenge and if you do not give it to her she will cheat and or leave you.
Stage Three: The Lover
The Lover wakes up, energized and ready for work. He reaches over to his phone on the night stand. Somebody texted him its the girl from last night. She is apologizing for her previous actions of that night. She asks for forgiveness for bringing drama into his life and understands why he had to kicker her out. He rolls his eyes. He currently is dating many women and does not see the need to reingage with one that is nothing but trouble for him. He slides out of bed gets dressed and leave. As he leaves your apartment he spots a cute girl crossing the street. He jogs over and stops her. He give her a steady gaze as he does and she knows he is the Lover and she can not help but swoon in his presence. He grabs her number and asks when she is free to hang out. She says maybe next weekend. He tell her steadily that he is very busy and if she wants to postpone the date for so long she will have to text him constantly. She changes her mind about waiting so long to meet up and asks if he is ok with tomorrow. He agrees. He walks away. Jump into his car and heads to work. He gets there. He gives a smile to the girl at the front counter. She returns it. He enter the office meeting. He feels very open. The Lovers presence fills the room. He sees adoration in everyone's eyes. Smiles come spread across everyone's face, knowing you to be a beacon for fun. Finding your seat you take on a sitting position not thinking of trying hard to take up space in an act of defiance or trying. He just takes a sitting position that is comfortable. Conversations come naturally because you know you are a great conversationalist and anything he says is awesome and will be received well. The Lover knows anyone he talks to will love him. He knows nothing but love and ignores the negative feedback having a lot of positive feedback reinforcing he is the shit.
The Science Behind Stage Three
Lover- Back in the day of tribes, he is the top of the food chain. He is a great conversationalist, leader and often times has his pick of litter when it comes to women. Being in the position he is in he is being looked at by everyone and any slip up could result in the jealous underlings over throwing him and possibly killing him in the process. You do not benefit from being meek and ill minded like in "the ostracized stage". Such a mindset would have you dead within a week. So your mind is firing on all cylinders. Running at a high pace day in and day out. People apart of the community call this state or god mode.
In today's society this means you are the shit. You enter a room you feel it pushed out by your exuberant personality. No you aren't james bond. You are a fluid being. Highly expressive and full of life. You fight against societal norms if they don't fit your view of how things are. You have boundaries for friends for girls because you know that everyone is a piece of the machine. And if they don't work well in its inner workings than it can easily be replaced with a piece that does fit it better. You are in abundance of friends, women and even jobs. You fear no one and know yourself well. Life is good.
The Road Map To Maintaining Stage Three
In today's society, laws in place and in a stable society, this is a highly effective mindset for everything you do in life. But there are still some pitfalls I must
pre-warn you about in closing.
1) In this stage it can be hard sometimes to keep your ego in check. But do your best. Your confidence can be your greatest friend or your biggest
enemy. Don't let it get the best of you. Its hard sometimes when you garner a group of yes men who are constantly bolstering your ego and telling you how great
you are. Try to recognize your flaws and fix them. Being blinded by your greatness will ultimately lead to your destruction if your not careful.
2) Its to easy to base all your confidence on the external when you have a great environment built around you. Base your confidence as best you can
on yourself and your experiences.
I know it can be daunting to scale the stages of abundance but it is achievable. If i can do it, so can you. Have full faith it is possible. The pay off is fully worth it. With that being said PEACE OUT!