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  • 1 Post By meteora

Thread: What do I do wrong for PU in a club?

  1. #1
    qwarck is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default What do I do wrong for PU in a club?

    Hi guys,


    I`m newbie in all this stuff, so please dont make fun of me.
    First of all, I want to say that before some things happened to me over the last week, I used to think that I`m an average good-looking guy, but after I went to club (for the first time here) my self-confidence went low, and now I think that I`m ugly.
    So I`m an international student and I study in a small college town, so most of population here are students. And there is only one club here. And I`m 24.
    I went to club like 3-4 times. So, let me give you some summary. All girls (except one) lied to me: they disappeared after I paid for their drinks.
    So, I will tell you how I approached the girls, so basically I was approaching saying "hey how are you? what is your name? can i get you a drink?" and then when she agrees, we go to the bar counter, while we were standing/sitting at the bar counter waiting for our drinks, I was asking her questions like "are you student here? what do you study?" and etc. and after she gets her drink she fuckin disappears. so in one day I payed like for 5-6 girls and all of them disappeared after they got their drinks.
    Just only once I was lucky to speak to girl after she got her drink, and we got to the point that I was hugging her and kind of kissing her cheeks, telling her that I like her, but she was saying like "how can you like me if you dont know me" and we went outside, her fuckin friend started pulling her like "lets go" and telling her something, then again I talked sweet to her she was like "I feel like I`m convinced", I even kissed her, she asked smthing (I can`t remember exactly) but it was something like "where we gonna go", I said "to my apartment" she said "no", I said "to hotel", she again said "no" ; then again her freakin friend told her smthing and she was like no we dont know each other I have to go.
    I can`t understand if she really liked me or she was just playing to get free drink.
    And the interesting thing is that I had a small talk to that crazy friend of her, she was saying like "you dont know each other take her out one day" she herself gave me her own number like "I will text you my friend`s number".
    The next day morning I texted to her friend asking for that girl`s number and she didn`t reply. I can`t understand why they lied, if she didn`t like me, she could just reject me politely without playing around with me.
    I also want to add that yes, to be honest, at the beginning I was lookin for One Night Stand, but then I changed my mind, I wanted to date her.
    And also sometimes I had a problem to understand what she is saying (I mean pronunciation, I couldnt hear) because of 2 things: I`m not a native speaker and it was very noisy in the club and outside. So is it because of that I failed? I mean, is it because I`m not American and I`m not native speaker she was not interested in me?
    And also I want to add that I`m White/Caucasian, I`m not Asian.

  2. #2
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    meteora is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: What do I do wrong for PU in a club?

    I used to think that I`m an average good-looking guy, but after I went to club (for the first time here) my self-confidence went low, and now I think that I`m ugly.
    So I`m an international student and I study in a small college town, so most of population here are students. And there is only one club here. And I`m 24.
    I went to club like 3-4 times. So, let me give you some summary. All girls (except one) lied to me: they disappeared after I paid for their drinks.
    ugly or not, buying drinks for women you don't know already is a recipe for getting used. instead of immediately offering to buy her a drink, talk to the girl for at least 20 minutes and get an idea of how interested she is in you before you consider getting her a drink.

    we got to the point that I was hugging her and kind of kissing her cheeks, telling her that I like her, but she was saying like "how can you like me if you dont know me"
    this is every woman's biggest fear, that men only appreciate them for their looks and would be happy to f*ck mannequins that look like them. women want to be appreciated for who they are, not what they are.

    I even kissed her, she asked smthing (I can`t remember exactly) but it was something like "where we gonna go", I said "to my apartment" she said "no", I said "to hotel", she again said "no" ; then again her freakin friend told her smthing and she was like no we dont know each other I have to go.
    I can`t understand if she really liked me or she was just playing to get free drink.
    she definitely liked you, you were just too pushy with her. when she said "where are we gonna go?" she was hoping you would take her on an insta date somewhere nearby where you could get to know her better before you take her back to your apartment for the wamba mamba.

    I can`t understand why they lied, if she didn`t like me, she could just reject me politely without playing around with me.
    lying was their way of rejecting you politely (and honestly that sounds more like the girls friend didn't approve of you so she cock blocked you with that little ploy)

    And also sometimes I had a problem to understand what she is saying (I mean pronunciation, I couldnt hear) because of 2 things: I`m not a native speaker and it was very noisy in the club and outside. So is it because of that I failed? I mean, is it because I`m not American and I`m not native speaker she was not interested in me?
    And also I want to add that I`m White/Caucasian, I`m not Asian.
    my best friend is also ESL. I helped him better his English significantly, though he still has trouble with certain figures of speech. the only advice I can give you there is to just keep practicing talking in English with friends and reading books written in English. slowly your language skills will improve.

    So I`m an international student and I study in a small college town, so most of population here are students. And there is only one club here. And I`m 24.
    I also live in a small college town, and I can tell you from experience that that changes the game. the club is actually the worst place to meet women near campus. you may come to notice that most of the girls who leave the club with a guy just so happened to already know that guy beforehand. as mark redman would say "in a college town night game is played during the day". you are far better off meeting women at the gym, club meetings, residence life activities, and house parties.
    once you make friends with enough people (guys and girls), you will start to see them everywhere, and then when you just so happen to bump into a girl you know at the night club, you can give her a big hug and ask her about something you know about her. having some comfort built before hand makes it take much less effort to hook up.

    also, having lots of friends and acquaintances will enrich your life in ways you can only imagine. in college social proof is your golden ticket to all kinds of fun and all kinds of women.

  3. #3
    qwarck is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What do I do wrong for PU in a club?

    Thanks for a big good reply!

    I have found her on facebook, do you think I should add her? Do you think that if her friend didn`t reply me I should forget about her, even if I don`t mind serious relationship with her? I mean, maybe her friend didn`t reply because they think I want only sex, maybe I should text or smthing explain her that I want to date her, add her on fb?

  4. #4
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    WillEdward is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: What do I do wrong for PU in a club?

    Quote Originally Posted by qwarck View Post
    Thanks for a big good reply!

    I have found her on facebook, do you think I should add her? Do you think that if her friend didn`t reply me I should forget about her, even if I don`t mind serious relationship with her? I mean, maybe her friend didn`t reply because they think I want only sex, maybe I should text or smthing explain her that I want to date her, add her on fb?
    I agree with what meteora said. She definitely liked you but you pushed it a little fast and there was practically no plausible deniability. You could have gone for a bounce and isolated her and build more comfort and attraction for the pull later.

    To answer your other question, I wouldn't add her on FaceBook. The best thing you can do is game other girls for now so you don't get too caught up with this one and when you do see her again, build a little more comfort and attraction and suggest an activity at a high point in the interaction and Number Close her.

    If you see her friends again, then work on befriending them and don't anything personally. Act like nothing happened and start fresh with them. Qualify them and reward them with relevant statements and then ask them another qualifying question so you have a more engaging conversation. Check out my post on having an interesting conversation.
    Elevate Your Game | Check out my blog for lay reports, attraction and dancefloor game tips !

    willedward.com

  5. #5
    meteora's Avatar
    meteora is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: What do I do wrong for PU in a club?

    I have found her on facebook, do you think I should add her? Do you think that if her friend didn`t reply me I should forget about her, even if I don`t mind serious relationship with her? I mean, maybe her friend didn`t reply because they think I want only sex, maybe I should text or smthing explain her that I want to date her, add her on fb?
    maybe you should chill out and forget about these women unless you bump into them in person again (witch will happen eventually since you're in a small town)

    adding her on facebook reeks of desperation. same goes with telling her you want to date her when you barely know her.

    what they think of you doesn't matter, as a matter of fact, these girls shouldn't matter that much to you at all.

    your primary focus in college should be to befriend lots of people and not put too much pressure on girls to date you. once you have enough Social Status, you can almost just let the girls come to you begging for your attention.


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