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  1. #1
    lez999 Guest

    Default A quick little help

    I met this girl a while back. This was all before I discovered PUA so my game was pretty weak. i came off as a little needy i suspect but I was making her laugh her ass off so I think it balanced out. We really hit it off and got her digits. Made plans to meet up with her and she stood me up. Not cool at all and I was not impressed. Thing is I didn't handle it well at all. I'm pretty sure I texted her a couple of times asking what was up, got not reply. Eventually I sent her a facebook message telling her what the hell? She shouldn't have left me hanging. She wrote back saying really sorry, she really likes me but she got back together with her ex and didn't know how to tell me. I wrote back saying come on, that's bullshit. You made plans to spend time with me and blew me off. You disrespected me and disrespected my time and I don't put up with that. My rule is, if someone makes a commitment to me, I expect them to keep it. If they can't keep it, at least let me know.

    Naturally, she didn't reply. Haha.

    Anyway it's been a good 9/10 months now and I have learnt a lot of the PUA stuff. I wanna have another shot with this girl. Thing is I'll never see her randomly so it's either via facebook or texting. My question is, what do I say?

  2. #2
    crobinson1 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: A quick little help

    haha umm yeah not long enough you need to make some life changes and stuff before you try and game her again. but after that, im pretty sure she isnt forgetting that or ignoring that, that not only made you look needy but controlling, jealous and overall not good boyfriend material. i highly doubt that you would be making her change her mind. i mean i guess since your a little smoother now and you could maybe say family death or something had you on edge and you didnt mean to blow up but i still highly doubt it. best thing you could maybe keep the conversation light, funny and try and gauge her attraction and naturally apologize for what happened but dont be overapologetic. just say it and move on. maybe a

    "hey stranger long time no talk. Im sorry for the last time we talked that i blew up. i had a ____ but thats no excuse. We should make it up to each other and meet up for a coffee" making it mutual as in you farked up blowing up and she farked up flaking that could help. meaning you are taking some of the blame. but i still highly doubt it. but wth give it a try. just dont invest too much cause your biking uphill with this girl
    I live in my reality and you’re a guest

  3. #3
    lez999 Guest

    Default Re: A quick little help

    Quote Originally Posted by crobinson1 View Post
    haha umm yeah not long enough you need to make some life changes and stuff before you try and game her again. but after that, im pretty sure she isnt forgetting that or ignoring that, that not only made you look needy but controlling, jealous and overall not good boyfriend material. i highly doubt that you would be making her change her mind. i mean i guess since your a little smoother now and you could maybe say family death or something had you on edge and you didnt mean to blow up but i still highly doubt it. best thing you could maybe keep the conversation light, funny and try and gauge her attraction and naturally apologize for what happened but dont be overapologetic. just say it and move on. maybe a

    "hey stranger long time no talk. Im sorry for the last time we talked that i blew up. i had a ____ but thats no excuse. We should make it up to each other and meet up for a coffee" making it mutual as in you farked up blowing up and she farked up flaking that could help. meaning you are taking some of the blame. but i still highly doubt it. but wth give it a try. just dont invest too much cause your biking uphill with this girl
    Oh for sure, don't worry, I'm not crazy in love with this girl that I have to have her. she was just hot and i'm pretty confident if i met her i could get her so i thought heck, why not. haha.

    I'm not sure apologising is the way to go. Surely that makes me look a little needy? I mean I haven't spoken to her since then so almost a year now. By suddenly sending a message out of the blue and apologising it looks a little pathetic no? I was thinking surely better to go with something light and playful and have an excuse why i am emailing her. Something like oh i thought of you recently cos i found cos i found this really cool place and then i met your friend there! or something. no?

    The funny thing is i got that original message where i told her off from a PUA site...

  4. #4
    crobinson1 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: A quick little help

    well i mean usually apolgizing looks needy but you have to eventually face that you were being a dick so i meant you to send that message as a way to be a PERSON not a PUA. cause in retrospect you fucked up big time with this girl. i doubt if you will ever get the chance with her again. lets say you send her something playful and fun. she probably just thinks this "oh shit him again, wow i wonder if i dont text back if he is going to be a creeper and yell at me again!!!" so i think your best bet is to take the bull by the horns. but in the end its your call bro, personally i would leave it be and get another girl.
    I live in my reality and you’re a guest

  5. #5
    lez999 Guest

    Default Re: A quick little help

    Quote Originally Posted by crobinson1 View Post
    well i mean usually apolgizing looks needy but you have to eventually face that you were being a d1ck so i meant you to send that message as a way to be a PERSON not a PUA. cause in retrospect you farked up big time with this girl. i doubt if you will ever get the chance with her again. lets say you send her something playful and fun. she probably just thinks this "oh Sh1t him again, wow i wonder if i dont text back if he is going to be a creeper and yell at me again!!!" so i think your best bet is to take the bull by the horns. but in the end its your call bro, personally i would leave it be and get another girl.
    Don't worry, I'm not counting on this girl. I just thought, heck why not.

    Do you think its better if i text her or facebook her? I'll do the apologising thing. I was thinking then a text, let me know what you think:

    "hey stranger long time no talk. i came across your name in my phonebook and remembered you. Im sorry for the last time we talked that i blew up. i had a bit of intense period with university in England but thats no excuse. We should make it up to each other and meet up for a coffee"

    Should I add at any point who it is?

  6. #6
    crobinson1 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: A quick little help

    lol not bad. no there actually is a way to answer the who is this message. so if she puts that you can make a funny comment and start building attraction.
    examples:

    “Your Prince Charming…duh!”
    “You didn’t save my #?!!! I’m so hurt…sniff sniff..lol”
    “{your name}. the ridiculously unattractive guy who was boring…haha ”
    “Your future ex husband of course ”

    all of these are good examples of how to make the who is this message funny playful and different rather than what most guy would do. "oh hey it chris from the other night at duffy's. dont u remember?!?" lol yeah thats lame. making it fun and different will cause you to be memorable and she will always smile and laugh when looking at your text messages.
    I live in my reality and you’re a guest

  7. #7
    tcomea2 is offline PUA Forums VIP Member
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    Default Re: A quick little help

    if you do it over facebook then no. I imagine she has deleted your number for the way you acted before. So if you do it by text you might have to.

    personaly i think your barking up the wrong tree. I seriously doubt you will ever get a chance with her again. And if you do you have to be a copletely differnt person with a bigger stronger frame then before, and know how to control it.

  8. #8
    lez999 Guest

    Default Re: A quick little help

    Quote Originally Posted by crobinson1 View Post
    lol not bad. no there actually is a way to answer the who is this message. so if she puts that you can make a funny comment and start building attraction.
    examples:

    “Your Prince Charming…duh!”
    “You didn’t save my #?!!! I’m so hurt…sniff sniff..lol”
    “{your name}. the ridiculously unattractive guy who was boring…haha ”
    “Your future ex husband of course ”

    all of these are good examples of how to make the who is this message funny playful and different rather than what most guy would do. "oh hey it chris from the other night at duffy's. dont u remember?!?" lol yeah thats lame. making it fun and different will cause you to be memorable and she will always smile and laugh when looking at your text messages.
    Surely that's weird to write a message saying sorry and then suddenly to joke around. I mean won't she be like 'err..ok then...'?

    Secondly, should I do it by text or facebook?

  9. #9
    crobinson1 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: A quick little help

    no its not wierd. cause if you focus on the problem its just like being overly apologetic. i gave you these as examples. by expressing that you can apologize and then joke around you are having a much stronger and confident frame. she will be a little hesitant and maybe just be like "umm yeah what do you need." but all you have to do is act completely different and be almost a whole new person with a stronger frame and bigger respect for people. lets do an example with her just completely shutting you down.

    You: "hey stranger long time no talk. i came across your name in my phonebook and remembered you. Im sorry for the last time we talked that i blew up. i had a bit of intense period with university in England but thats no excuse. We should make it up to each other and meet up for a coffee"
    Her: "who is this"
    You: "chris. the riculously unattractive who was boring...haha"
    Her: oh i remember. do you need something?
    You: "no i was just flipping through my phone and thought why dont i text that stranger, its been forever and ages!! :P"
    Her: "maybe not long enough!!"
    You: "oh yeah it totally hasnt been long enough. i mean r u still the girl who watches gilmore girls. i cant talk to girls like that "
    Her. "lol oh come on thats a great show"

    i showed how she might be thinking and their is going to be one of two outcomes. 1) she will stop texting and just ignore you or 2) she will loosen up and just start talking to you. so what you want to do is stay positive and try and get her to laugh
    I live in my reality and you’re a guest

  10. #10
    reivaj_86 Guest

    Default Re: A quick little help

    crobinson is right... two possibilities but you don't lose anything by trying right?
    I could add something to you post, by saying that if you wanted it to be more indirect, you could try sending a very cool msg like: "This weekend some friends and I are throwing this big BBQ party bla bla bla, (make it interesting and fun), yous are all invited to come!! Woohoo!" ("you sent the msg to you phonelist contacts")
    If she deleted your phone number, she'll probably ask who you are.
    And then you can start you advance, the thing here is that you don't appear like you were thinking about her, it's pure "coincidental" and you appeared fun already!
    So you can say: Ow, i sent the msg to all my list of contacts , but i think i remember you, long time no talk....


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