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  1. #1
    Revivia Guest

    Default Friends with Benefits

    I am interested in having sex with this one girl and she told me she isn't really ready for a relationship right now because of a breakup a few months ago. That being said, should I be upfront and honest with her and tell her I want to have sex with her and be friends with benefits with her?

  2. #2
    Raven Guest

    Default Re: Friends with Benefits

    Heck no. If she's still tender from a break up, that is a sure fire way to drive her away altogether. That is just saying "I only want to use you for sex, I don't really care about you otherwise." If you cared about her, and a woman can sense if you do, you will want a relationship with her. If she was not the relationship type, then she probably would not be so tender from a broken relationship. Therefore, trying to make her a friend with benefits is probably not going to work, let alone being up front about it.

  3. #3
    Salaami Guest

    Default Re: Friends with Benefits

    Be a sweetheart, continue with keno, build sexual Tension, let her start most text conversations, be alpha around her.

    When girls tell you that they don't want to do anything with you, its not actually what they're telling you. They are saying they are going to end up doing something with you, and they want to have a way out if something goes wrong (they "said" they didn't want to do it...)

  4. #4
    Pinai Guest

    Default Re: Friends with Benefits

    Since I don't know the particulars of the when and why and how she told you she isn't up for relationships yet, I guess you should just stop letting her talk to you so much about relationships. In fact, no serious anything at all. Hang out with her sometimes and do flirt with her and create sexual Tension. But don't be the guy she turns to when she's feeling all sad.

    Now, take your cue from her too. She might be setting expectations actually and isn't averse to sex with you either.

  5. #5
    Coyote Guest

    Default Re: Friends with Benefits

    Quote Originally Posted by Raven View Post
    Heck no. If she's still tender from a break up, that is a sure fire way to drive her away altogether. That is just saying "I only want to use you for sex, I don't really care about you otherwise." If you cared about her, and a woman can sense if you do, you will want a relationship with her. If she was not the relationship type, then she probably would not be so tender from a broken relationship. Therefore, trying to make her a friend with benefits is probably not going to work, let alone being up front about it.
    I dont agree with Raven's stance altogether. No offence to the other great trickster in our pantheon.
    I feel that if you take your approach of saying hey lets just be friends with benefits you are showing that you are honest and not just going to waste both her time and your time with this LJBF shit. Put it out there. Say you value the friendship. Say you value her. But be honest to your needs. Give her enough time as you see fit, but dont waste any more time than necessary mate on one piece of Fluff.

    She wants you to lead and set down some ground rules

  6. #6
    Raven Guest

    Default Re: Friends with Benefits

    Aye, I agree with Coyote to a degree. Let us know what you do and how it works out, I am curious.

  7. #7
    Revivia Guest

    Default Re: Friends with Benefits

    Thanks for your comments Coyote, Raven and others. I have 1 month before I see her again due to winter break. Should I just text her that I want to be friends with benefits, or wait until mid january till I see her again and tell her in person?
    Last edited by Revivia; 12-19-2010 at 02:47 PM.

  8. #8
    cutflow is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Friends with Benefits

    lots of flirting, sexual escalation. Kino. she just broke up with her bf but she wants to have sex. who will she have sex with?

    definitely not someone who's going to ask for it, "hey friends with benefits?" that's an instant no, and its the same as asking for a kiss. you don't ask for a kiss or sex, you make it happen, using techniques like the ones mentioned above and like this you turn her on. your view should be, "what ever i want i get" if you have to ask for something you want then sorry, game over. this is your game, not hers.


    cf

  9. #9
    Blue Guest

    Default Re: Friends with Benefits

    You're overthinking this. At the end of the day, either she is sexually attracted to you and is emotionally capable of engaging in a sexual relationship with you, or she's not. The fact that you ask or just try to alpha your way into it is not going to change the way she feels about it. It is much more dependent on the attraction and comfort you've built with her. Asking her will neither blow it nor make it happen when it wouldn't have otherwise.

    Just relax. She brought up the relationship thing. That means she's thinking about it. She likes you. Now get out of your own head and enjoy being with her to whatever extent that you are, let the definition of 'what you are' come out naturally.

  10. #10
    Pinai Guest

    Default Re: Friends with Benefits

    Create sexual Tension during the winter break. Make her want you Cross the bridge of whether it's going to be a fubu setup or a relationship when you get there. At the very least, you have someone to practice your game with


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