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  1. #1
    JustinMueller Guest

    Default Approaching in bars

    So I have been checking out the bar scene for the past couple of days and I'm still a little confused as to how a basic approach/pick up goes in these kinds of places.

    Every time I walk into a decent bar I notice that most of the good looking chicks are already busy talking to dudes...do you typically just walk up to these kinds of mixed groups? It seems like it would be lame to compete with a guy whos already tryin to work that girl.

    Id much rather walk up to a group of girls rather than a group of girls that already has a dude tryin to pick up on them.

    Also, I'd love to hear what kinds of things you typically do to work a bar pick up. Do you try talking to groups of just guys (and maybe some girls too) first to build social proof, do you make small talk with the bartender/bouncer and all of that? Or do you just go directly for what you want??

    I guess I'm just looking for a road map I can follow so I can have some sort of strategy going on in my head that actually works haha

    Any advice is much appreciated, thanks guys!

  2. #2
    drkeith is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Approaching in bars

    My favorite attraction to play on in a more social/possibly college type bar is social intuition. Despite the years of experience these guys probably have partying and socializing under their belts...they are still afcs. and remember that. Don't let the mixed sets scare you. When i first started running sets it really intimidated me. until i got excellent reactions opening mixed sets. I like opinion openers for these. Vibe for about 30 seconds then pop the q "how do you guys all know each other." If nobody says they are dating then your good. If the guy says hes dating one of them and she shows really bad body language when he does. then your good. A great thing is when they arent dating (which is most of the time) and you hold court in this group which thus attracts all the other women in the bar. Now, you are winning over the guys in the set by bringing them girls outside of their social circle and less of a social threat if things go bad or they are too foreward. They dont have to worry about how sleeping with the girl from their anatomy class will affect their social life monday morning if she regrets it. Try a simple energetic, " alright...a magic genie comes through that door *point to the entrance for effect* and he takes either you looks or your personality...what do you choose?" then start vibing about "well yeah fine say looks...but how are you gonna go attracting guys when your out at the club with a "smokin" personality." they will eat it up. drop a false time constraint and then bam. roll with it

  3. #3
    JustinMueller Guest

    Default Re: Approaching in bars

    Quote Originally Posted by drkeith View Post
    My favorite attraction to play on in a more social/possibly college type bar is social intuition. Despite the years of experience these guys probably have partying and socializing under their belts...they are still afcs. and remember that. Don't let the mixed sets scare you. When i first started running sets it really intimidated me. until i got excellent reactions opening mixed sets. I like opinion openers for these. Vibe for about 30 seconds then pop the q "how do you guys all know each other." If nobody says they are dating then your good. If the guy says hes dating one of them and she shows really bad body language when he does. then your good. A great thing is when they arent dating (which is most of the time) and you hold court in this group which thus attracts all the other women in the bar. Now, you are winning over the guys in the set by bringing them girls outside of their social circle and less of a social threat if things go bad or they are too foreward. They dont have to worry about how sleeping with the girl from their anatomy class will affect their social life monday morning if she regrets it. Try a simple energetic, " alright...a magic genie comes through that door *point to the entrance for effect* and he takes either you looks or your personality...what do you choose?" then start vibing about "well yeah fine say looks...but how are you gonna go attracting guys when your out at the club with a "smokin" personality." they will eat it up. drop a false time constraint and then bam. roll with it
    very cool.

    is the Genie thing your favorite opinion opener or somethin? Any other ones that you'd recommend that work for you?
    I think I'm going to use the Wheelchair one (asking if theyd date someone in a wheelchair) cuz i think that one's farkin hilarious so atleast i'll enjoy myself if nothing else goes my way haha

    After you open a set with a chick that you want, do you leave the set and come back later?? or do you just stick around and keep workin them until you're alone with her...

  4. #4
    jbardu87 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Approaching in bars

    show social proof, have fun and talk to anyone you want. thats the quick response ill elaborate tomarrow

  5. #5
    JustinMueller Guest

    Default Re: Approaching in bars

    Quote Originally Posted by jbardu87 View Post
    show social proof, have fun and talk to anyone you want. thats the quick response ill elaborate tomarrow

    theres got to be more to it than that. and the problem with "just talk to anyone" is that I naturally go blank when entering bars . im definitely an introvert even though I can interact with pretty much anyone. I really think that I need some kind of script to open up a bit ya know....but please do elaborate

  6. #6
    Sly91 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Approaching in bars

    I have to say, I love mixed sets!

    I have always enjoyed a challenge and recently I have been opening more and more mixed sets.

    The first thing to do in these situations is to show social proof that you are in fact a much better catch than the guys they are with.

    Something I like to do is to start with something like 'Hey it looks like the party is going on for over here" the girls normally love this because your complimenting them and the guys see this and go with the flow. It is at this point that I start a routine for example a cold reading about the group or an individual. This again demonstrates social proof. It can also lead into the whole 'so how d you guys know each other?"

    Once this has been done and the group is comfortable with you, you are in a situation to game the target and Isolate her.

    Alternatively, if you don't want to open the whole group you want to go straight the target, you can always isolate a target, by coming in from the side and asking an opinion opener. For Example, saying "Tell me what they hell is that girl thinking dancing like that" or "What do you think of that guys suit, etc etc. Another one is slightly nudging her and making it seem like an accident she will turn round and has her back to the group which means you can attempt an opener straight away.

    hope this helps!
    Best of Luck
    Sly

  7. #7
    jbardu87 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Approaching in bars

    Alright heres my expanded bar game:
    A bar is a place that people go to chill out and have fun. So what do you want to do when your at said bar? You wanna have fun. Stop caring about meeting women, or what to say. Go to the bar with the intentions of having fun with friends or by your self (what ever your preference).

    So now your at the bar and having fun. Basically, if you see a set of girls walk up to them and talk. Yes catchy openers are awesome for the most part. But in a bar they really are not needed. UNLESS, you are opening a mixed set. Which sometimes you need to do but from what I've learned is that if you look there really are alot of sets of just girls. I really like what sly said! That will work with mixed sets. In a mixed set you really just wanna open the group and then AMOG the group. Tell a funny story, get the set in a good mood and laughing. Find your target, neg her alittle but dont show her too much attention. once she is wondering why your not showing her attention, acknowledge her alittle then Isolate. But if its just a set of girls, you can pretty much walk over and say hey if you want. one of my favorite things to do, is walk over to a table of girls and just sit down with them. then say something like "im sorry but me and my friend were arguing and he doesnt believe how gay he looks in that shirt, he looks gay right?" at least something to that effect. something silly that can start a convo. or even, "hey, i gotta smoke a cig can you watch my beer. ive been roofied before and id be okay with you doing it" or say something as simple as "hi,I'm bardu". a bar is a place people expect to meet people, the more girls you talk to the more numbers you'll leave with.

    Another great way to meet girls at a bar is outside in the smoking section. the one reason i like that you cant smoke inside. Usually its only one or two girls outside smoking together so it already broke up the set and you dont need to worry bout opening a mixed set. Outside while smoking, IF YOU SMOKE, you can say to a girl with a big sh^t eatin grin on your face, "you kno smoking is soo bad for you!"

    I also agree with DR.keith, social proof in a bar is absolutely the best thing you can have going for you. When i go to a bar i always introduce myself to the bouncers, and continually say what up to them when walking out. lets put it this way 2 times to a bar i never need id to get in again. but women notice this, they see a guy walking off the street, skipping the lines and not showing id. he must be popular, he must be high on the social ladder, i want to know him. the other people to know are bar tenders. if its a pub that has alot of regulars you can get to know them to, and eventually when you walk in everyone will be saying high to you and vying to say what up. you are now god in that bar and every girl will wonder who you are that you know so many people. however bouncers should always be first person you should introduce your self to. they provide the most social proof possible!


    the best advice i can give you is to get outa your head, and stop thinking in just sarging terms. go out to have fun, go out to enjoy your life. if you make meeting girls a priority your wasting your time. like i said, have fun, talk to anyone and everyone, and bring social proof to the table and you will meet girls.
    Last edited by jbardu87; 01-31-2011 at 10:11 PM.

  8. #8
    livingstan84 Guest

    Default Re: Approaching in bars

    Quote Originally Posted by JustinMueller View Post
    theres got to be more to it than that. and the problem with "just talk to anyone" is that I naturally go blank when entering bars . im definitely an introvert even though I can interact with pretty much anyone. I really think that I need some kind of script to open up a bit ya know....but please do elaborate
    I kind of agree. Sometimes I'll just draw a blank when I go in there. At the same time, I've been getting better at it lately because I've been focusing on trying to talk to strangers in general. You know, talking to cashiers and people on line at the supermarket, etc. It seems to be helping a little bit, but I definitely still get Approach Anxiety kinda bad sometimes...

  9. #9
    ThePrep is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Approaching in bars

    One of my absolute sure-fire openers would be the following;

    Note this works best with a set of HB8 +
    Simply walk up to the set and introduce yourself with the following;
    "Hi, I just came over to give you guys a warning..." (naturally they'll all be like "OMG! what?", immediately at your mercy if you look serious)
    "Well, i can see you're drinking, and i jsut came over to warn you that there are some really unattractive guys in here tonite, and i wouldn't want you to fall for their cheesy pick up lines..." (end this with a charming smile and they will love it!!!)

    if there is a Bitch Shield thrown up, even better!!! the most common bitch shield response will be something along the lines of "oh what? like the cheesy one you just used?"
    the response i would use for any comment like this would be to neg like so
    "ouch! you're good! listen, if any guys do come over, just push her to the front...she can scare them off with that look! you'd make a fortune as a bouncer, darling"

    from there you can easily slip into a cold reading and isolate your target!! good luck dudes!!!

    Note
    I admit this is not my own routine, and i can't remember who posted this on here first, but it is brilliant, so whoever posted this opener....i salute you!!!

  10. #10
    Kingy is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Approaching in bars

    approach everyone! mixed groups are easier. Remember to always say, "how do you both know each other" or "how do you all know each other" usually the girls dont know the guy, friend from work, or brother.


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