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  1. #1
    jellymint43 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default How do you deal with a situation like this?

    I have a HB classmate, and at a party we hit it off and she was really into me. We danced and got close and flirted. She kissed me. Long story short we went out, almost hooked up and then she LJBF'd me, but she said she's really attracted to me.

    I'm not really looking for a relationship right now - i'm looking to hook up and the problem may have been that I told her upfront. I still would love to hook up with her. I'm really attracted to her, and I think I almost got her. I finally gave up and i'm Freezing Her Out now.

    What would you guys do in this situation? I see her quite often in class and going out socially.
    for instance last time we went out, she and i flirted, but another girl that I am hooking up with was there. HB didn't seem to care. (unlike another classmate I had hookedup with got very upset last time, and now that girl hates me)

    Just wondering how do you deal with this?

  2. #2
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    theBOB is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How do you deal with a situation like this?

    shes attracted to you, so treat her LJBF like LMR. agree, then see if you can plow through it. treat like any other girl you would approach, like the LJBF never happened.

    it seems you vibed well, didnt get the sence that you "gamed" her from your post, more that it happened naturally. freezing out here may make it seem like you want something from her and if you dont get it, shes useless to you. thats the problem with freeze-outs, and i think they are hard to deploy without sub-comming a deep underlying motive.

  3. #3
    jellymint43 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How do you deal with a situation like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by theBOB View Post
    shes attracted to you, so treat her LJBF like LMR. agree, then see if you can plow through it. treat like any other girl you would approach, like the LJBF never happened.

    it seems you vibed well, didnt get the sence that you "gamed" her from your post, more that it happened naturally. freezing out here may make it seem like you want something from her and if you dont get it, shes useless to you. thats the problem with freeze-outs, and i think they are hard to deploy without sub-comming a deep underlying motive.
    It's hard because she says hello to me like we're friends, and when i try to talk sexually with her, she looks confused.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: How do you deal with a situation like this?

    see its hard because it usually comes across naturally to me now if I want to be friends or if I want some sort of romantic involvement. I'd say try a soft Freeze Out (without being weird and forceful) and then come back strong. Make sure u control the frame and be the MAN.

    Its hard to get back to that place when your in friend zone. Keep going out and meet more women, sometimes sticking points correct themselves, when you meet better hotter girls lol. Let me know how it works, I'm interested now.

  5. #5
    Magnum is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How do you deal with a situation like this?

    Looking confused is better than a shut out, you have the comfort, you just may need to build back up the attraction instead of just jumping to sex talk.

    I don't mean to hijack the conversation, but theBob brings up a really good question-- how does one effectively perform a Freeze Out? I thought I had it down, but I've been called out on it a couple times lately, which really threw me off. How do you do it so you don't get back the "so you're mad at me now?" response? Maybe my bored face is just angry looking, I don't know lol

  6. #6
    theBOB's Avatar
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    Default Re: How do you deal with a situation like this?

    i should post that lol

  7. #7
    jellymint43 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How do you deal with a situation like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by Magnum View Post
    Looking confused is better than a shut out, you have the comfort, you just may need to build back up the attraction instead of just jumping to sex talk.

    I don't mean to hijack the conversation, but theBob brings up a really good question-- how does one effectively perform a Freeze Out? I thought I had it down, but I've been called out on it a couple times lately, which really threw me off. How do you do it so you don't get back the "so you're mad at me now?" response? Maybe my bored face is just angry looking, I don't know lol
    I got the "are we cool?" and "have i done something to offend you?" she like doesn't get it, and she thinks I dislike her now. I was near her once and she said, "Joe doesn't like me anymore" to a mutual acquaintance. oops.

  8. #8
    Magnum is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How do you deal with a situation like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by jellymint43 View Post
    I got the "are we cool?" and "have i done something to offend you?" she like doesn't get it, and she thinks I dislike her now. I was near her once and she said, "Joe doesn't like me anymore" to a mutual acquaintance. oops.
    I think like theBob said, you may have botched the Freeze Out and sub communicated your intention. Don't feel bad, we've all botched the freeze out at some point I think.

    If she's really attracted to as she said, the LJBF is a LMR. If not, well, you're in the friend box. your best bet is to try some of the 'how to turn a friend into a girlfriend' techniques. The only stuff I remember is the old stuff from Ross Jeffries, but it did used to work pretty well. I think some of the newer guys like diangelo and dicarlo have some techniques for you to read up on. Or earlier forum posts on how to bang a friend.

    Other than that, end the freeze out and just be flirty and confident.
    Last edited by Magnum; 04-13-2011 at 04:55 AM.

  9. #9
    studmuffin52 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How do you deal with a situation like this?

    I think freezeout swiftly or built trust in the relationship (friendship) here, then one magical day whether she's really happy or suddenly trusts you, then go for what you wanted. No sexual jokes for a while, this is when you need to act like you support her and want her ... even though you only to hook up with her.

    Just because it happened naturally, doesn't always mean easy.. it's just means you can skip to the fun part faster (by that, i mean flirting and gaming).

  10. #10
    jellymint43 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How do you deal with a situation like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by studmuffin52 View Post
    I think freezeout swiftly or built trust in the relationship (friendship) here, then one magical day whether she's really happy or suddenly trusts you, then go for what you wanted. No sexual jokes for a while, this is when you need to act like you support her and want her ... even though you only to hook up with her.

    Just because it happened naturally, doesn't always mean easy.. it's just means you can skip to the fun part faster (by that, i mean flirting and gaming).
    i'm almost afraid she thought we were friends and now she's legitimately hurt. She had been only coming up to me and asking how i've been ,and asking if i want to study together in the library. She seriously acts like we never even hookedup and i find it bizarre. She doesn't even react when I'm talking to or hitting on other girls. I have female friends, i dont think i need another one.


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