Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Results 1 to 8 of 8
  1. #1
    Ricky Guest

    Default How Do I Approach Women In Bars?

    I always feel so intimidated trying to talk to people, it seems that everyone else knows each other and I don't know how to get women to like me. What the hell should I do?

  2. #2
    Playa's Avatar
    Playa is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 1,087, Level: 18
    Level completed: 87%, Points required for next Level: 13
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    31 days registered1000 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Posts
    104
    Points
    1,087
    Level
    18
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
    Rep Power
    75

    Default


    By far and away the single biggest thing preventing you from approaching women in clubs and bars is your attitude and Mindset when in those places. You can call it your state, you can call it your mood.

    Whatever name it is given, it can be the *one thing* that, if changed, can give you a huge improvement in your results when attracting women.

    So how do you get into the right ‘mood’ when you are in a club, bar or pub?

    The secret is going to come as a bit of a suprise to you. This is not going to be a run-of-the-mill flirting guide that gives you the standard bogus advice….

    I want to do a little mental experiment with you for a moment: Think of what it is like on your first day of work in a brand new job. (Stay with me here, this is relevant I promise) On your first day, you see all these people around you that you know you are going to have to get on with because you will be spending the next however many months/years with them.


    How do you act in that situation? If you are anything like me, you wanna make some friends, and generally get on well with people. Just ponder for a moment how you did this in your first day in your current job.

    Now, imagine, when you are in a club, it is really your first day at work, and the people that are there are your new colleagues. How do you approach this situation?

    You wanna be pretty nice, find commonalities quickly, and try to share cool things with them or help them out in some way. This attitude takes all the pressure off ‘getting laid’ or ‘picking up women’. Which are your natural (and self-sabotaging) focuses when you go out with a mindset of ‘how to meet women’.

    It’s like when your driving a car, you aren’t concentrating on your destination. You are concentrating on the road, the other drivers and the potential hazards that you may have to react to. Your main focus is driving your car, not arriving at your destination. The journey makes the destination inevitable.

    Focus on the *journey*. Let the destination take care of itself.

    In other words, stop trying to get laid, and start being a cool, friendly, social guy. Just like on your first day of work.

  3. #3
    rdc Guest

    Default

    Hey Ricky!

    I can'r really give more advice than the previous person, but can give a tip. I always set my iPhone to ring three minutes into my set. 1) dhv: iPhone and people probably call you a lot sice you've been speaking for less than 5 minutes and "ring ring"..... I'll put my finger in my other ear and motion to the ladies w/ my index finger "1 minute" and walk off. Come back, "OMG, you will not believe this woman that just called me ........"

    2) gives you a chance to bail if you're getting nervous (a time constraint of sorts). You can always come back and don't loose value of others watching.

    Just practice watching your body language in the mirror so it looks real. If you've got an iPhone the app is called Fake-a-Call and is phree!!!!

    Good luck dude; may the pickup gods be with you.

  4. #4
    rdc Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Playa View Post

    OMG, cute scissor gang mafia chicks. One on my left looks kinda shy and out of her comfort zone.....

  5. #5
    Bill Preston's Avatar
    Bill Preston is offline Owner - PUA Forum
    Points: 9,840, Level: 66
    Level completed: 48%, Points required for next Level: 210
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social31 days registered5000 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    1,171
    Points
    9,840
    Level
    66
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    20

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by rdc View Post
    Hey Ricky!

    I can'r really give more advice than the previous person, but can give a tip. I always set my iPhone to ring three minutes into my set. 1) dhv: iPhone and people probably call you a lot sice you've been speaking for less than 5 minutes and "ring ring"..... I'll put my finger in my other ear and motion to the ladies w/ my index finger "1 minute" and walk off. Come back, "OMG, you will not believe this woman that just called me ........"

    2) gives you a chance to bail if you're getting nervous (a time constraint of sorts). You can always come back and don't loose value of others watching.

    Just practice watching your body language in the mirror so it looks real. If you've got an iPhone the app is called Fake-a-Call and is phree!!!!

    Good luck dude; may the pickup gods be with you.
    Good idea, creates social proof and a real false time constraint.

    Bravo.

  6. #6
    Tango Guest

    Default

    I think for me... FTCs are something I need to work on more. I also need to re-inforce the FTC with a FTA (false Take Away) via rocking or some other non-verbal.

  7. #7
    Kyle Masters is offline Banned PUA
    Points: 57, Level: 1
    Level completed: 14%, Points required for next Level: 43
    Overall activity: 0%
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Location
    Jersey Shore
    Posts
    3
    Points
    57
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: How Do I Approach Women In Bars?

    Good Question, and I've found there to be quite a few right answers. I'm new to this forum so I wanted to quickly introduce myself. Check out the about section of website to learn more: njdatingadvice.com/about/(nothing to sell here - just my website where I publish a TON of free advice about my success with women).

    So on to the question....

    How to Approach Women in bars:

    Smile, laugh, look like your having a good time, and ask her simple open ended questions.

    Before you go to approach her, make yourself noticed by her while you are chatting with your friends. Do something silly that might attract their attention your way, but don’t make eye contact with her or any of her friends.

    Always be smiling and laughing. No girl wants to talk to negative nancy on the other side of the bar.
    Don’t think long and hard about what you are going to say to her. The more you think about it, the more likely you are to fark it up.

    When you finally muster enough courage to approach her, make it a casual walk by, make it look like you just realized she was there, and ask her an open ended question. (one that won’t let her answer yes or no geniuses)

    i.e. I usually go with something like “hey, on a scale from 1-10, how bad is my friends shirt?” All you are doing here is breaking the ice. Once she gives you an answer, say something funny back like wait until you seem him dance, that number will go up a couple of notches.

  8. #8
    daltonbrayall is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 4,526, Level: 42
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 24
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    1000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Location
    New Richmond WI
    Posts
    609
    Points
    4,526
    Level
    42
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    218

    Default Re: How Do I Approach Women In Bars?

    Post is from three years ago bro
    If i get a guy some a$$, he gets it for a day; if i teach him how to get it for himself, he's tappin forever


Similar Threads

  1. I can approach and open with ease. BUT WHAT DO YOU DO AFTER THAT?
    By Encore in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 5
    Last Thread: 11-06-2009, 01:36 PM
  2. How to get over approach anxiety!
    By RokStarz in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 2
    Last Thread: 11-18-2008, 02:25 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com