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  1. #1
    Steve31 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default do you think that this a good opener for a girl in my building?

    I had previously opened with a girl that works in my building with something simple asking what movies shed recommend and we got to talking for a couple of minutes and i told her how i had free movie tickets...however i was unable to close at that current time.

    My plan to to re approach with this:
    Hey, i only have a couple of minutes(time constraint) but you seem like you need to get out more (neg) so im gonna help you out(demonstrating value?) by letting you use my extra movie ticket with me

    Thoughts?...

  2. #2
    keepurcool is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Is this a good opener?

    movie is a bad first date. suggest something else my dude. just because you talked about movies it doesnt mean you have to go to one. there is a post on the forums with a bunch of great ideas, i think its under the dating category.

  3. #3
    StringBeanz's Avatar
    StringBeanz is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Is this a good opener?

    lol ..
    Mr. Solo

  4. #4
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    Mr8Hyde6 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Is this a good opener?

    Movies are one of the WORST first date ideas. You don't get to have enough time to build comfort and rapport because you really can't talk much during the movie. Unless you want to be those people that everyone gets annoyed at. Choose a different first date/hang out.

  5. #5
    Steve31 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Is this a good opener?

    I just pretty much the same line and said:
    “hey so I only have a couple of minutes (time constraint) but you seem like you need to get out more (she laughed) so ill do you the favor by taking you to Princeton tomorrow”. She said “oh” disappointedly which first made me think she was busy, however she then told me still sounding disappointed, that she had a boyfriend. It kind of seems like she did because she seemed sincere.
    I just left it at that and said see you later. Is there anything i could have done differently, and is there a way of telling if someone really has a boyfriend?

  6. #6
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    Mr8Hyde6 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Is this a good opener?

    Stalk her and find out. I am kidding. There isn't a sure way of seeing if she does or doesn't. Sometimes just reading signs and being able to read a person well can tell you if she really has one. But, look at it this way... If she was lying about her boyfriend, what would her reasons be to lie to you about it?
    If a girl was interested in you, there would be no reason to tell you she had a bf if she really didn't.
    I sometimes just go with the, "Oh, I didn't know you can't have guy friends." Or I go along with something like, sounding sincere like all I wanted was is to be friends, "Oh, I didn't mean to give you the wrong impression. I wasn't asking in a date sort of way, just in a friendly sort of way."

    Princeton is a nice town/area. Assuming you are from New Jersey. (Got to represent lol)

  7. #7
    Steve31 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Is this a good opener?

    thanks that helps alot because i really didnt know what to say after she said she had a bf..and yes i am from NJ...do you know any wings that live in the Princeton area?

  8. #8
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    Mr8Hyde6 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Is this a good opener?

    I have a few buddies in the South Brunswick/Robbinsville/Hamilton area. Not really much wingmen. I tend to open up the sets, but they can handle their own though.

  9. #9
    Steve31 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Is this a good opener?

    I dont know if you could tell, but i am just a beginner so i guess what i mean is that im in the "can hold my own" category opposed to leading the set.
    but thx for your shared knowledge

  10. #10
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    Bradders is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Is this a good opener?

    i agree, movies are terrible fisrt date ideas. anything other then coffee is a bad idea, i'll explain and give you anidea in amo, fisrtly to your origional question.

    you cannot ask a girl out from an opener. you mightaswell just say"want to go ona date" which puts you 1 step above a little boy asking a girl for the same thing becasue your an adult now. and if shes hot, you better beleive she gets it alot.
    if you open her, dont open with a neg, negs are for hot girls that need to put you int he catagorie of"not interested" but are ment to be off the cuff, as far as negs go its not a bad one but in the wrong place and may not be nessasary.
    negs should really be used in clubs or situations she will be warey and have her sheilds up, in which to knock down, otherwise your just being mean. by all means be funny, use it in a jokey way later on when your getting on, but go up to a girl and say" you look like you dont get out much" makes YOU look worse then she will feel, but she'll still feel bad.
    try opening for the converstaion, dont be afraid to play the long game, especialy if you both work in abusy environment.
    so you open, you joke, but nothing to mean if mean at all. if shes uninterested and needs tob e taken down then maybe a neg but dont start off with it.
    second you start your jokes, its 101 sarging but remember people act differntly in differnt s ituations, shes not all defensive becasue shes not out having loads of guys hit on her, but at the same time shes not in asocial mood either. the same principle can be applied to the hot waitress, she may feel attracted to you but she wont make amove becasue shes working and has less chance or motivation to talk to you or even care!

    so you have to take the attention, but bare in mind their are more ways to give people the fake time constraint then just telling them! in a work area simply your body language will do
    have yourself slightly facing away like your ready to keep walking at any moment, dont approach her head on otherwise it looks like you have purpose, instead try and walk past and pretend like yo ujust noticed her doing something
    if she looks up set or frustrated say
    "you look like your having fun"
    if she looks engrossed or overworked say
    "hey seeing as though you have alot of time on your hands could you do me afavour?" be sure to smile and look li ek your joking then carry the thread on to a more "how have you got so much to do" type thing.

    just little things comment on it in ajokey way take her mind off it. if on the otherhand it seams she has not alot ot do or having fun say
    "shouldnt you be working? come ony ou cant modle yourself off me"
    or si miler to.
    play the long game, take off maybe see her agai n in the day(unless it was out of your way) but by all means initatie contact, be as funny or witty or intelelrefnt or mysteriouse(whatever your game is) and keep going afte r a day or so or several contacts, make acomment that you have abit of fun

    "ha yeah..well i gotta go, shame though you were just getting interesting" sly laugh and smile if your building enough reppore then she will get the joke
    "tell you what, come meet me after work tomorrow evening we'll get a coffee or something and talk about work, it only makes sense as we talk about anything but it here"

    that end only works based ony our conversation but you get the idea! the date should start off in a cafe or something, start wi th a sweet, a cake something nice, nothing too big for adrink ceretnly not alchoholic and try steer her away from a caffinated drinks. say it would mess with the taste of the cake ro something(iv done that plenty of times) dont make abig deal about the money and shoot ehr down if she does
    just pay if she says anything look at her like she just said your tie wasnt in the perticular bow for the standereds of a working envrionment and say
    "...its fine" and laugh carry themout and dont mention it.
    talk laugh get close but its important to take her to another place a quiet bar or something, this is where you can get a drink or two sit close etc
    the trick to this(and its evil i'lladmit but it works)
    it gives the impression to her that you've been dateing longer then you have. becasue you go to severasl locations in 1 evening.
    at the next event simply be closer be more liberal with keno and play it cool, there are little tricks and the like buti m not writing a book ehr i can help you more if you like but im sure you'd cope iv answered your question and thens ome

    best of luck
    "It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent, but the one most
    responsive to change." Charles Darwin


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