I have always been a shy guy until I have a few drinks in me. Last weekend was my first attempt at approaching and it worked great.
I didn't think anything of it as I was going to get my drink at the bar I asked a girl who looked bored why she wasn't dancing. She got interested and we started dancing at the bar and then moved it to the dance floor after talking some.
Anyways that night I had more than a few in me, I wasn't drunk I just had a solid buzz going. That got me relaxed enough not to care about any possible rejection. Now I realize that is not good I need to have the confidence to be able to do that sober.
Tonight I went out and since I was driving I told myself only 1 drink and I stuck to it. I spotted a 3 set and decided I would try to approach them with the "Are you shy?" I grabbed a buddy and told him we were going over there and that's what we would try. I walked up and a little passed them and turned to face all of them with the approach as I did not want to approach them from behind. I delivered the line and the first indicator I knew it was failing was I guess I did not say it clearly and confidently. I got a "what shots?" It was a failure on a few fronts and I realize that I did not approach with confidence and they saw right through it.
The good is I had the courage to go up to them without needing to be buzzed, the bad news is it seems my confidence is at the bottom of a bottle and without it I can't expect to succeed. Also the rejection was not as bad as I built it up in my mind. Not fun, just not as bad.
I don't call the night a complete failure I was able to flirt a little with a friends friend and was doing some serious grinding with a friend of mine (although she was pretty drunk and it didn't require much more than me being there and putting my hand on her hips). Although in the past I would have been shy and quiet and not carried on the conversation some and I would have gone all stiff and wall flower with the dancing portion, so some improvement.
It seems this is a process but does anyone have any advise or tips about successfully opening sets with confidence without any liquid courage?