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  1. #1
    jshawn is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Question need help keeping conversation alive

    I met this girl at a college party and ended up getting her phone number. I texted her the following morning how she was feeling and we talked for a bit. I ended the convo with "if you are going out again, you should hit me up so we can hang out or something". I texted her two days later and used the debate opener and we texted a little but I made it seem like I was busy and told her I would talk to her later and she responded by saying "Ok later!. What I want to know is What should my next opener be? After I use a opener do I just make small talk or how do I keep the convo alive and interesting?
    Last edited by jshawn; 09-16-2011 at 01:31 AM. Reason: spell check

  2. #2
    Mr8Hyde6's Avatar
    Mr8Hyde6 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: need help keeping convo alive.

    I feel like it's all situational and depending on the conversation you had with her in person and how you are in person. I myself like to keep things short, up to suspense, and mysterious. I give bits and pieces of myself, but never really conversate to open up to them with full conversations. I save that for in person.

    I am a huge advocate on using like a personal inside joke to open up texts. (I have wrote this numerous times on this site), I use a little inside joke as a reminder to a girl of who I am and use it to open up texts. Example. Met a girl in NYC. She lived in uptown. Billy Joel song, "Uptown Girl" came on. I gave her the nickname Uptown Girl that night. When I text her up, I say, "Hey uptown girl............" and whatever else comes. This creates a feeling of comfort because the girl automatically remembers you for the time you had together. The inside joke is fun and innocent and she feels automatically at ease and not the weird, "omg what do I say back and this texting stuff is awkward."

    Now, in your situation, I do not know it fully so only you know what you two talked about and what you can consider an inside joke/memory.

    However, since you have already been talking to her via text. You may have to step it up a bit. It seems that your saying that the texting has hit a lull and kind of plateau. Instead of text, call her. It shows a lot of confidence and a lot of times, text game is too much overthought. When its phone game, it seems (for me) to come naturally. Try it out. It won't hurt.

  3. #3
    Striker9 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: need help keeping convo alive.

    Heres a tip ,stop putting too much emphasis on ,'openers' try to naturaly open ,i believe the only material that should be canned is stories because stories are actually canned because they are told over and over ,it wont be 'ethical' if you approached ten women who know each other with the same opener,u will be known as the guy who uses the same line ,but it will be ethical if you told them the same story cause its a story ,you will be known as the guy who can tell a good story . So focus on which story you should tell next not which opener i should use next, there is a thread on storytelling search 'storytelling' in the forum and look for 'tell stories to get the girl'.
    Dont have routines as the cards in your deck ,have skill instead ,because once a routine is done ,its done ,you cant do it again in the same interaction ,but skills can be done over and over ,so then you could play a card twice.

  4. #4
    idomiralin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: need help keeping convo alive.

    If you want to be able to talk to a girl, then you have to have the right attitude. You should not be her fan and kiss up to her, because she's not a goddess. Even if there appears awkward silences, you should believe, that it's her fault. Don't think about what you should say. You will do better, if you develop hooks, I mean you take subjective words from her sentences and build new once. You have to give her topics, to rely on and the conversation will flow as you want.

  5. #5
    Ecko30's Avatar
    Ecko30 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: need help keeping conversation alive

    what exactly is a hook? My neighbour tells me about her teachers and her misfortunes and blah blah...what kind of hooks can I use? what is a hook?

  6. #6
    mangofraky is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: need help keeping conversation alive

    Best advice. Be interested. Your predominate thoughts must not be sex if it is then you wont have nothing to say. Just get the feeling of wanting to know her and the conversation will run sweet. Trust me.

    LOL worst thing about that tactic is if the girl is down and ready for sex I am stuck lol

  7. #7
    mangofraky is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: need help keeping conversation alive

    one thing I learn its another sport. you need to practice

  8. #8
    Coup is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: need help keeping conversation alive

    I would forget about all the openings and on how to sound correct and funny. It seems like this is early and you two just recently met. That's good.

    Simply ask her out now. Call/text her: I'm doing [insert activity] at 9:03 (for example) and you are coming!"

    Or set it up later in the week. Give her only two choices of days.

    If she says no, move on. Or freeze her for a month, or until she contacts you. Trust.

    The text you used: "if you are going out again, you should hit me up so we can hang out or something" This comes across as being way too available and almost if you are going to be made or be broken depending on if she makes plans for you! You make the plans! You are busy, you are the one to be around. I want to even hang out with you! That's the attitude you must have 24/7. It's not a lie, it's truth.

    After you text her and tell her to hang out with you...depending on her response go from there. but get the invite out then worry about being witty. Come back for what to say, but first get the proper date set up...if she bites great, if not, move on or freeze her for a few weeks at the least!

    And most importantly, don't put her higher than you! She is on your level. Don't treat her like she is a goddess, because she is just a woman. You are the bomb, she will think so too. In fact she already does, refresh her memory.

    G'luck my good friend. I'm rooting for ya.


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