Hey, guys. I am a coach in Albuquerque, New Mexico and I wanted to pass on a few tidbits of advice that should help you progress in the game.
First of all, for those with Approach Anxiety stop hitting on women. Guys you have no idea, if this woman is worth your time. She may be beautiful, but maybe she is a horrible person, perhaps she is boring, or just dumb as a brick. You goal when conquering approach anxiety is just to open. Don’t even bother escalating until you can open smoothly without fear of rejection. I can’t even recall the last time I blew an open. I promise you, it does get easier.
Secondly, use a maximum of three openers and stick with them. The reason being, if you use the same opener 10 times you will hear nearly every possible response. This allows you to formulate a response that allows you to maintain control over the conversation. For example, I had a buddy get called out for being a PUA, the first time this stumped him and he blew the set. He wanted to be ready for the next time and crafted a brilliant response for future use that I was lucky enough to see. When this girl called him out for being a PUA “like the guys on that show”, he immediately used the slashing motion at his neck and yelled “cut, cut, cut, she’s on to us, stop the tape” It was pure comedic genius and by controlling the situation in a fun playful way, she totally backed down.
Also, guys this next tidbit will help you immensely. Make it about her (them) as soon as possible. While people are marginally interested in cute little stories about other people, they are always EXTREMELY interested in themselves. My favorite hook is “I bet in five minutes, I can KNOW your friend as a person almost as well as you have gotten to know her in the past five years”. Women can NOT resist this. Women pride themselves on their intuitive nature and they want to see if you are right. You can talk about crazy stories, flossing before or after brushing, give dhv examples and etc. Or she can tell you her sexual desires and things that spark her emotions. I can assure you the fastest way to lock her in is getting her to talk about herself and let her give you all the ammunition that you need to seal the deal.
Finally, the second most powerful weapon in my arsenal is eliciting and feeding back values. I have a very deliberate strategy that makes women crazy. As they are talking about themselves, I make a mental checklist of a few points. She says she loves to travel and spend time with her family. I file that away in the back of my head and make small talk for about 5 or ten minutes. When the conversation shifts to me I say something like “I love to see new places with my friends” (i.e. travel.) and talk about how much fun it is to take my niece and nephew for ice cream (i.e. spend time with family). They never catch on to this and soon she will swear that you are soul mates. I actually used to feel guilty because I had two or three new “soul mates” a week.
Good luck gentlemen!!!