If you want to pick up women, the first thing you need to do is ask yourself why? Are you looking for a one-night stand or are you looking for your future wife?

I don’t think that your approach varies too drastically in each of these scenarios, but you may be looking for two different types of women. Someone who is OK for one night may not be the one you want to spend your life with. So what you should do is know what you want before you go looking.

What I mean by that is know what traits you are looking for in a woman. Put these characteristics and qualities down on paper. That way you won’t be sidetracked by a beautiful package if the rest of what you are looking for is not there. Or, conversely, if all you want is a beautiful woman then you won’t worry about the other qualities that don’t cut it.

In addition to knowing what you do want, it helps to write down what you DON’T want. This helps clarify what you are looking for in a woman and can save you a lot of time.

OK, now that you know what you are looking for, start the hunt. Based on the kind of woman you are looking for, you can decide if you are going to find her at the farmer’s market, at the trendy bookstore, at the ballroom dancing class, at the library, on the volleyball court, at the hip night club or at the corner bar.

When you see a woman you want to meet, you can try several approaches. You can try to pick her up with standard but effective pick up lines, with magic tricks to attract women, with a smile and long glance, it all depends.

Once you have decided on your approach, if you haven’t already, it is a good idea to try to make her laugh. Either by your self effacing behavior or your wit or you silly jokes. Once she laughs, her barriers are down and you have a chance of her really getting to know you.

If you have done your homework, you can tell immediately by her body language if she is responding to your advances. If she is, keep on going, but don’t lay it on too thick. I think the key is to treat her just like anybody else you have just met in any other scenario, but to add a very subtle, very small flirtation element to the interaction. That way she understands you are not looking for a new best friend that you are interested in her as a woman.

Don’t stick around too long. You want her to know you are a busy guy with lots of fun interesting things going on in your life, but that you would definitely like to meet up with her at another time. This is when you can get her phone number and give her yours, if that is your style.

I wouldn’t call her the next day, but you might want to text her later that night, saying it was great meeting her and you hope to be able to talk to her more at a later date.

If she responds immediately, you can continue the conversation from there, but if she doesn’t’ then I would wait and call her the following day and arrange a time to hang out. Good luck.

Bill has been studying how to pickup women for the last 5 years and has been sharing advice as a guest instructor at the top Pickup Artist boot camp in NYC.