I think deep down many men have a fear of looking silly or dumb when they are talking to a girl. This fear can keep you from ever approaching someone and could prevent you from meeting the girl or guy of your dreams. You see, believe it or not, women also have this fear.

In fact, it may be hard to believe, but two of the world’s most beautiful and seductive women had a plan to combat this fear.

The stunning Sophia Loren and the chic Jackie O’ both employed a little trick that made them irresistible during conversations. They planned their ad lib discussions. What does that mean?

It doesn’t mean that they planned word-for-word what they would say to someone at a dance or dinner party. What it means is they would think ahead of time about possible discussion topics and then be prepared to bring these up during a lull in the conversation.

The key is to find subject matter that is NOT about you. It could be about a book you just read and disliked, a movie you saw and loved, the proper way to grill a steak on the barbecue, the current political battle and so on. It doesn’t matter, as long as you have an opinion on the subject. And that the topic is not about you. Too many guys just talk about themselves or even worse brag about themselves. Having an interesting conversation that isn't bragging or all about you, is the key to learning how to pick up women.

You see, there is a common misconception that a good conversationalist is someone who has a bunch of funny stories or witty anecdotes to share with others. This is so not true. A good conversationalist is actually someone who listens to the other person.

Leaders and powerful men (guys that were what we would call the alpa male)around the world were captivated by Jackie Kennedy Onassis. Not just because she was well versed on so many subjects, but because when she spoke to someone, that man felt like he was the only person in the world.

The ability to make someone feel this way during a conversation makes you a great conversationalist. By expressing genuine interest in what the other person is saying and asking questions, you will never run out of things to say.

But what if you are bored by what the person is saying? Well, then move on. Why on earth would you want to have a relationship with someone who bores you anyway? And if the person cannot engage in conversation after you have brought up some interesting topics, then move on, as well.

Have standards for whom you talk to.

Jackie O never suffered fools. If someone bored her, she would move along. She had no qualms about making sure she spoke to interesting people.

And please don’t be afraid that you aren’t interesting, because this is one area that is completely, 100 percent in your own control. You become an interesting person by – here’s the secret – being interested. By being interested in events and subjects other than yourself, you automatically become interesting. You can once and for all conquer that fear of being boring and not having anything to say.