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Unread 05-13-2012, 03:10 AM
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Default Is she interested or just being nice?

Hey, I'm very new to this subject( Litteraly just found this
website.

I honestly wanted to ask you guys about this situation I have with a coworker, her being 19 and I 21.
Well, this girl at work (We work as cashiers at a pretty big supermarket) is a very bubbly character. Atleast when I speak with her, as I havn't really noticed how she interacts with other people.
I've always been a very shy guy, but I've been trying to fix this lately. So her and I started talking lately, during breaks or when we're substituting eachother at the register. I've been trying to be more talkative, smiling, sarcastic in a nice way and poking fun of her, and it seems like she doesn't hate me. A typical response she has been making whenever I tease her is "Thanks, I love you too!", obviously with a little smile on her face. Whenever she does that I tend to break.
I'm usually very withdrawn when it comes to personal space, to be more specific, I don't mind being close or touching people, but I always fear that they do.
But a few days ago at work, when she was substituting me, she'd stand very close to me, while waiting for me to get through the costumers and I thought I'd try telling her the "best reverse knock knock" joke in the world - Which I shamelessly stole from reddit: knock knock, come in, ....
While that joke didn't exactly.. Resonate with her. Out of nowhere she started giving my shoulders a light massaging, and saying "You're cute when you try to be funny". ( She actually repeated the cute part a few moments later, without the "when you try to be funny" part)
Keep in mind all of this happended in font of a line of customers, I'm surprised I wasn't more embarressed than I was.
I find this girl interesting and different. I enjoy talking to her, and I want to make something happen. I realise physical contact is a part of this, sadly I suck at that. I feel like a complete weirdo whenever I touch people by my own volition, as a result of this, I havn't touched her a single time yet, while she has touched me several times. How do I fix this? I've already friendzoned myself once, by not being able to make a move. I do not want that again.
Might as well ask, do you guys think she is even interested in me? She is usually the one who opens conversations with me. Though I've been getting better.
Yeah, I realise this post is WAY longer than it should be, and horribly formatted. And for that, I apologize.



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Unread 05-13-2012, 03:25 AM
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Default Re: Is she interested or just being nice?

She obviously feels comfortable with you, have you tried a little more contact to see how she reacts ? Id be tempted to ask her to meet up after work or at least get her number.

Im a little rusty to the game. im sure some of the seasoned experts will give you thier input.

Good luck mate.


 
Unread 05-13-2012, 06:34 AM
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Default Re: Is she interested or just being nice?

I am by no means an expert, but I would say she's definitely digging you. I have a hard time cracking the touch barrier at first, but you in a position to make it easy. Throw a hand on her shoulder or arm as you guys are switching up at the register, of if youre feeling really lucky, go for the middle of her back.

I would say to definitely work on asking her out too... I know it's a tricky situation because you guys work together, so just be cool about it, and if she shoots you down, it's no big deal either. But make a move sooner than later before she loses interest!

Also, her touching you, telling you your funny and calling you cute, twice, are big signals!

Good luck


 
Unread 05-13-2012, 06:51 AM
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Default Re: Is she interested or just being nice?

Quote:
Originally Posted by roland82 View Post
I am by no means an expert, but I would say she's definitely digging you. I have a hard time cracking the touch barrier at first, but you in a position to make it easy. Throw a hand on her shoulder or arm as you guys are switching up at the register, of if youre feeling really lucky, go for the middle of her back.

I would say to definitely work on asking her out too... I know it's a tricky situation because you guys work together, so just be cool about it, and if she shoots you down, it's no big deal either. But make a move sooner than later before she loses interest!

Also, her touching you, telling you your funny and calling you cute, twice, are big signals!

Good luck
She is ahead of me regarding the back part... She already touched my lower/middle back, as we were doing the actual switching. I guess I am being the shy girl in this ordeal? Haha.

I do want to make some kind of real move, but I have low selfesteem towards strangers. I tend to be very outgoing when I'm with close friends, but around people I havn't known for many months or years, it's a whole other case. Gotta fix that.


 
Unread 05-13-2012, 06:57 AM
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Default Re: Is she interested or just being nice?

I know exactly what you mean... I'm the same way usually. It's all basically a mind game for yourself. Try to envision her as a friend you've know for a long time to trick yourself into upping the Comfort level.

Haha, yes it sounds as if the roles are reversed and she's almost running game on you, but that's ok too. You just need to swing the momentum back.

I don't know if this is bad pua form, and maybe an expert can comment on it, but you could always ask her out on a double date with some one who your good friends with and their bf/gf. Then the four of you could go bowling or shot pool or something. Just make sure the night IS framed as a date, and not hanging out!! Having a friend around might help easy you and coax you out of your shell.

Also spend some time lurking around here, I've picked up some good tips!


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